I have distinct memories of stuffing a pillow in my shirt or my pyjama onesie from like 3-4 or so... in my cot while napping after lunch. I remember it felt so comforting to have a full stomach and then my huge pillow-belly to hug.
I also figured out very early that if i used elastic but robust materials I could recreate the kind of pressure I felt when I overate, I had this one fairy or mermaid leotard thing for dress-up and it was very shiny and very stretchy but also extremely resistant to force.
I already had quite a tummy back then and I would put on that leotard over a very thick and fluffy sweater that i'd stuffed more clothes under and oooooh the compression on my big tummy felt so good, and also how enormous it looked... I'd waddle around my room, arching my back, sticking my tummy out as far as it went and rub my hands all over it's shiny smooth roundness.
Later I evolved to wrapping stretchy blankets around my empty tummy, then putting on my swimsuit and then eating and eating to get the pressure to increase. I started seriously bingeing in secret once I got put on my first diet, and the padding kind of became part of the ritual... as soon as I was alone, or when i'd feel the kind of uncontrolleable need to eat coming on I'd like frantically wrap the blanket I had hiding in the back of my closet for that purpose around my gut, throw on my swimsuit and some clothes back over it just in case someone came home unexpectedly and caught me... and rush downstairs and start shoving food in before I even had time to sit down.
And then lie on my bed, stomach swollen and aching, and still keep the layers on as long as I could bear it, feeling my glorious rising belly and feeling utterly sated.
Eventually I got fat enough I didn't need padding to feel like my belly was huge, but to this day I like putting on a tight top that compresses my gut a bit before overeating...
I also figured out very early that if i used elastic but robust materials I could recreate the kind of pressure I felt when I overate, I had this one fairy or mermaid leotard thing for dress-up and it was very shiny and very stretchy but also extremely resistant to force.
I already had quite a tummy back then and I would put on that leotard over a very thick and fluffy sweater that i'd stuffed more clothes under and oooooh the compression on my big tummy felt so good, and also how enormous it looked... I'd waddle around my room, arching my back, sticking my tummy out as far as it went and rub my hands all over it's shiny smooth roundness.
Later I evolved to wrapping stretchy blankets around my empty tummy, then putting on my swimsuit and then eating and eating to get the pressure to increase. I started seriously bingeing in secret once I got put on my first diet, and the padding kind of became part of the ritual... as soon as I was alone, or when i'd feel the kind of uncontrolleable need to eat coming on I'd like frantically wrap the blanket I had hiding in the back of my closet for that purpose around my gut, throw on my swimsuit and some clothes back over it just in case someone came home unexpectedly and caught me... and rush downstairs and start shoving food in before I even had time to sit down.
And then lie on my bed, stomach swollen and aching, and still keep the layers on as long as I could bear it, feeling my glorious rising belly and feeling utterly sated.
Eventually I got fat enough I didn't need padding to feel like my belly was huge, but to this day I like putting on a tight top that compresses my gut a bit before overeating...
1 year
