Gaining by accident and don't know how to stop it now

Joined 2 years

Canuck:
this is a topic that i really relate to. i was a thin, fit feeder for so much of my adult life. i started gaining by accident, and haven't really been able to stop it since.

i've posted about my experience over the last 4 or 5 years, so i won't rehash all that. but i wanted to talk about how lifestyle contributes to this. i sympathize with @otherday66 because i've tried to go back the gym a few times, i've tried to change my diet a few times over the years (including this year) and for the most part it hasn't been successful.

part of it is how seductive the feedist lifestyle is... it's kind of built on pleasure, abandon, and sloth. to move to a mode of discipline, effort and abstinence (from food!) is a really hard change to make. and it's too easy to be tempted back into indulgence, i find (again, and again...).

i'd be interested to hear from anyone who has found success in striking that balance after going to the fat-side?

Morbidly A Beast:
If you indulge don’t beat yourself up about it just eat it and move on, can’t just give in if you’re serious about the goal. The problem is not indulging it’s indulging consistently all the time

Lair your fitness goals yeah starting out you might not be where you used to be but give it a month of light cardio after being a sloth xD get yourself some good shoes even if your old ones from before are good you’ll need some more ankle support

This is what I was told during my anorexia recovery but I didn't trust people. When I eventually started fo believe that indulging now and then wouldn't make me fat, I quickly realized my fear had been justified. My body holds on to any extra calorie I give it, so I'm starting to think that maybe I should try that keto thing and try to stick with it. When I managed go cut processed foods and refined sugar from my diet, I felt less tired and my mood was better, too (but it might have been because I was losing weight).

2 weeks

Gaining by accident and don't know how to stop it now

Monthofdays

Joined 17 years

Otherday99:
Maybe this is the wrong place to ask for advice, but I've seen people with the same thoughts. Lmk what you think.

This kink has been with me since I can remember, but I never considered gaining, actually feeding someone is more my style. I've been thin my entire life... until I went to a medical appointment 6 months ago and to my surprise I was 20lbs over my ideal weight. This actually made me feel insecure and thought of losing the weight, but my best friend told me that the BMI metrics and all of that can go to hell and I had to accept myself.

I've noticed that I'm addicted to carbs now. Everyday I eat (at a bare minimum!) an ice cream or a McDonalds meal just to taste something good. If I'm not outside, I crave entire chocolate bars during midnight. I started going almost daily to the fridge at 2am to crave something and then continue sleeping due to the hunger. All of these bad habits obviously made me gain a couple pounds. I don't have a scale at home, but I'm sure I'm passing the 200lbs mark by now. I noticed that half my wardrobe does not fit anymore, I'm starting to have a double chin and my arms actually doesn't fit in some of my shirts anymore. Not to mention that my belly is now resting in my lap, which I never had the chance to experiment before. I went to a store to buy a size 12 jeans, and I was shocked when I tried on a size 16 and it wasn't closing. And that was the biggest size they had.

As erotic as this may sound, the reality is that I'm starting to feel bad about my body. Don't get me wrong, I like eating, and the thought of having someone to tie me up and feed me fast food is a big turn on for me, but at the end of the day I feel like I'm slowly destroying my health and I don't feel pretty. I'm also involved in a modeling and gaming entertaimment kinda stuff, so getting my way into obesity is not the ideal thing to do if I want to continue in this project.

The obvious solution is to start exercising now, but I actually hate physical activity due to bad experiences and everything is set up for me to gain more: all members in my family are fat and always giving me candy, and at work (which is sitting all day at the office) they're always gifting taco Tuesday, pizza day, beers after work... some of my coworkers told me that they got fat due to this type of job and I can see them struggle with diabetes or mobility issues at their 30s and 40s!

Any advice on how to balance both lifestyles, or how to start a positive change? I feel ugly and I'm afraid that when I start losing the weight I'll be too big or even with health issues.

The good news is that no one can force calories into your body.

Put the fork down. Increase your activity level, if you're able.

I would also recommend using a fitness tracking app that has a meal logging function. It's tedious, but if you record your meals for about two weeks you will quickly realize how calorie dense the modern diet is. This should help you be more mindful when eating and planning meals. There seems to always be some gimmick diet that is in vogue on Instagram but the simple truth of the matter is weightloss is /primarily/ a result of consuming less calories than you burn through out the day. Set a kcal goal and track your eating. If you're honest with yourself(and the app lol) you should slowly lose some weight.

You didn't get fat over night(unfortunately). Ergo you aren't going to lose weight over night(unfortunately).

Keep at it and as long as you are disciplined more than not you will have success.

As for the kink aspect of all this, a good rule to abide is never do anything to someone(or yoursel) that you aren't willing to undo.

Good luck!

2 weeks

Gaining by accident and don't know how to stop it now

Glitter Jelly

Joined 2 years

I've tried calorie tracking apps and I'd have to eat less than 1200 calories to lose any weight. My metabolism has been ruined by years of undereating/restricting.

2 weeks

Gaining by accident and don't know how to stop it now

Monthofdays

Joined 17 years

Glitter Jelly:
I've tried calorie tracking apps and I'd have to eat less than 1200 calories to lose any weight. My metabolism has been ruined by years of undereating/restricting.

Insulin resistance is pretty rough. Cardio will help reset your metabolism.

I would recommend at least thirty minutes to one hour a day to start.

Ninety minutes would be ideal if you can eventually work your way up to it.

The important thing is to stay positive and try. Don't get discouraged by the set backs. Just think positively about moving forward towards your goal.

Losing weight isn't easy or particularly fun for that matter.
Negative thoughts about yourself and what you have to do can stop you before you even try.

Don't get discouraged. Earnestly try it. Remember, if it doesn't work for you, there's something else out there that will.

Additionally, as your physical activity increases your stamina and mood will improve. You will also be able to eat more than 1200 calories.

When I was training for a power lifting competition, I was eating 3500 kcal a day just to maintain my weight.

It was to the point I was sick of eating and would mechanically eat oatmeal, eggs, chicken, grits, broccoli, etc.

It sounds like your base activity level is about zero. At this point anything would be an improvement. Even 30 minutes of uninterrupted walking. That's easy enough to do. I usually listen to a pod cast about war hammer 40k when I do mine. I like to go a bit before sunset, you know, that golden hour. It's relaxing and the evening sun feels good on your face with sun glasses on.

2 weeks