Nocticula:
I know most, if not all of us have been into this lifestyle from the very start of life. So my question is... what is your earliest memory of it?
Mine is not a specific memory, but rather something I was borderline obsessed with when I was a little girl.
I am an artist and I have always loved drawing. When I was little, I used to love drawing people. I remember distinctly I would always draw skinny people and then something would happen to them and they would become fat. Whether it be eating too much, a sneaky friend trying to make them "undesirable", etc. I would draw them in tight clothes, or not fitting into spaces, or people humiliating them, and at that age I didn't understand my infatuation with this topic, but when I first started having a sexual identity, it all started to make sense.
I still have those drawings... somewhere?
Before I was old enough to go to school I used to draw 'fat people'. I would make the head as small as possible and make the body as round and as large as I could on the page. I used to fill the pages of my drawing books with these images. I also remember being fascinated by fat people I saw in real life such as a couple of the playgroup moms. I wanted to be them.
Oh and where I lived at that time we used to have a mobile library visit. Someone would set up some chairs on the pavement and read us kids a short story. I love the 'Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly' story especially as a larger lady used to read it and I imagined her in that scenario.
