General

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

MarkSeanDavis17:
I've been with one FA and we spent weeks getting to know each other first, establishing trust and respect. Then when we met, the physical things felt natural and we had established trust and communication. If we didn't get along so well, there's no chance we'd meet and continue with fun times together.

Stevia:
Exactly! I definitely think that this is how it’s supposed to go anyways.

Munchies:
A lot of people are ashamed of this kink. And I get it. I do. But I see a lot of FAs (and feeders) who try to keep that part of them a secret so they don't lose whatever relationship they want to be in.

Do not do this. This will not end well.

Instead, do what Mark does: Take the time to get to know the other person, build trust, and communicate well to establish mutual trust.

Maybe you aren't right for each other. And that's okay. There are over 8 billion people in the world. Statistically speaking, you can find at least a couple of people that you vibe well with depending on how you go about things.


Your advice is as golden as always! You had pretty much emphasized what Mark said and I can relate to some of what you experienced as well. Because I’m sure it’s something that many fellow FAs would think the same, or should! Lol.

I just hope that you weren’t trying to criticize me for agreeing with Mark here. 😅
5 months

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

MarkSeanDavis17:
I've been with one FA and we spent weeks getting to know each other first, establishing trust and respect. Then when we met, the physical things felt natural and we had established trust and communication. If we didn't get along so well, there's no chance we'd meet and continue with fun times together.

Stevia:
Exactly! I definitely think that this is how it’s supposed to go anyways.

Munchies:
A lot of people are ashamed of this kink. And I get it. I do. But I see a lot of FAs (and feeders) who try to keep that part of them a secret so they don't lose whatever relationship they want to be in.

Do not do this. This will not end well.

Instead, do what Mark does: Take the time to get to know the other person, build trust, and communicate well to establish mutual trust.

Maybe you aren't right for each other. And that's okay. There are over 8 billion people in the world. Statistically speaking, you can find at least a couple of people that you vibe well with depending on how you go about things.

Stevia:
Your advice is as golden as always! You had pretty much emphasized what Mark said and I can relate to some of what you experienced as well. Because I’m sure it’s something that many fellow FAs would think the same, or should! Lol.

I just hope that you weren’t trying to criticize me for agreeing with Mark here. 😅


Nah, I was addressing the broader FA base. You good, love.

The common advice I hear is that you should give up on finding someone who shares your kink because of how niche it is. Instead, some people recommend dating a fat person outside of the kink, never tell them, and just admire them in secret.

I'm not saying dating a non-feedist is bad. But if you are going to do that, you have to be honest and value them for more than their body. If you don't, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak.
5 months

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

Shades:
I'm sure this will be familiar to many here and many will have similar experiences: you tell someone you like you're an FA and they don't take it well. It's happened to me quite a few times and I'm wondering if it happened again today... Sucks, doesn't it?



Personally? This doesn’t happen to me. In my experience, people are usually relieved, some have even blushed when they find out that I’m attracted to fat bodies.
5 months

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

MarkSeanDavis17:
I've been with one FA and we spent weeks getting to know each other first, establishing trust and respect. Then when we met, the physical things felt natural and we had established trust and communication. If we didn't get along so well, there's no chance we'd meet and continue with fun times together.

Stevia:
Exactly! I definitely think that this is how it’s supposed to go anyways.

Munchies:
A lot of people are ashamed of this kink. And I get it. I do. But I see a lot of FAs (and feeders) who try to keep that part of them a secret so they don't lose whatever relationship they want to be in.

Do not do this. This will not end well.

Instead, do what Mark does: Take the time to get to know the other person, build trust, and communicate well to establish mutual trust.

Maybe you aren't right for each other. And that's okay. There are over 8 billion people in the world. Statistically speaking, you can find at least a couple of people that you vibe well with depending on how you go about things.


Not sure what you mean by "this will not end well?" I'm a closet FA myself in a relationship and I would never push my boyfriend into gaining unless I knew for sure he was into it.
2 days

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

MarkSeanDavis17:
I've been with one FA and we spent weeks getting to know each other first, establishing trust and respect. Then when we met, the physical things felt natural and we had established trust and communication. If we didn't get along so well, there's no chance we'd meet and continue with fun times together.

Stevia:
Exactly! I definitely think that this is how it’s supposed to go anyways.

Munchies:
A lot of people are ashamed of this kink. And I get it. I do. But I see a lot of FAs (and feeders) who try to keep that part of them a secret so they don't lose whatever relationship they want to be in.

Do not do this. This will not end well.

Instead, do what Mark does: Take the time to get to know the other person, build trust, and communicate well to establish mutual trust.

Maybe you aren't right for each other. And that's okay. There are over 8 billion people in the world. Statistically speaking, you can find at least a couple of people that you vibe well with depending on how you go about things.

Glitter Jelly:
Not sure what you mean by "this will not end well?" I'm a closet FA myself in a relationship and I would never push my boyfriend into gaining unless I knew for sure he was into it.


Let me put it to you this way. If you aren't able to trust the person you are dating with the deepest, darkest parts of yourself, you might wanna reevaluate things.

It's good that you have no intentions to get him to participate in your kinks secretly. But you should examine why you are closeted with him. Do you trust him? If not, why?

It's okay if he doesn't share your kinks. I'd say it's fairly normal for one person to be into things the other isn't into. My partner is really into chastity play and orgasm denial. I like pregnancy and breeding. These aren't shared interests, but we trust each other enough to talk about these things.

Some things we'll play around with. Other things, we explore by ourselves. No one right way to go about it - just what works for the relationship.
1 day

Reactions to you telling people you're an fa

Shades:
I'm sure this will be familiar to many here and many will have similar experiences: you tell someone you like you're an FA and they don't take it well. It's happened to me quite a few times and I'm wondering if it happened again today... Sucks, doesn't it?


Rejection is a gamble that will always be there, and you’ll roll the dice every time. The good news is you get used to it, and it will stop fazing you.

Reactions depend on when does the person I like find out I’m an FA. Some would hate it, some would love it. So I try to use it as a filter by tastefully mentioning it maybe on Tinder (“BBWs swipe right, please” for example). This way potential matches are better fits, and it should cut the disappointment hopefully.
1 day
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