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Attaker2z   United States
Joined 5 months
Does anyone else feel the way that I do? I’ve been on and off this site and feabie for a bit and I feel like I’ve been stuck within a death spiral for about 4 years now. I really want to enjoy feederism and the people in it as much as possible, but every time I come back, there are just so many bad actors that being a feeder feels tiring rather than satisfying. It’s not just the creeps and scammers, but it’s the entitled people who constantly ask for money and shove a PayPal link in my face. Like I just met you and you’re already starting off with this. It’s gotten to the point where I just instantly block people the moment they beg. It’s annoying and I fucking hate it. Like get a damn job if you’re so fucking hungry all the time. The reason I want to be a feeder is to indulge in the fetish with a like minded person, not take care of an adult baby.


Long story short, I’m really over the beggars, the scammers and the creeps. And I may just quit the feeder thing as a whole for good. It’s probably for the best at this point. Just too much toxicity and e-begging
2 months

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Harleen Zaftig   United States
Joined 5 years
It's important to remember that your personal relationship with the fetish is your personal relationship with the fetish.

What I mean is -

Yes, there are bad actors. There are bad actors everywhere, in every community.

There are scammers, catfishers, and even out and out toxic and abusive folks.

However, remember: You don't need to be in the community to enjoy the kink, and even if you're in the community.... you don't need to be *in* it.

Does that make sense?

See if you can remove yourself and just witness the space, rather than let all of that negativity and toxicity get into you and color your experience of the kink/fetish itself as a whole.
2 months

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Attaker2z   United States
Joined 5 months
I’ll try to do that. Thank you for the input
2 months

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Harleen Zaftig   United States
Joined 5 years
Attaker2z:
I’ll try to do that. Thank you for the input


Oh and to be clear by "remove yourself" I don't mean leave or lurk...

I mean that in terms of removing a certain element of vulnerability.

Instead of jumping in to the deep end of the pool and immersing yourself with all of the feederism community has to offer, maybe go in through the shallow end and get the water up to your shins.
2 months

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Attaker2z   United States
Joined 5 months
Got it
2 months

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Attaker2z   United States
Joined 5 months
Attaker2z:
Does anyone else feel the way that I do? I’ve been on and off this site and feabie for a bit and I feel like I’ve been stuck within a death spiral for about 4 years now. I really want to enjoy feederism and the people in it as much as possible, but every time I come back, there are just so many bad actors that being a feeder feels tiring rather than satisfying. It’s not just the creeps and scammers, but it’s the entitled people who constantly ask for money and shove a PayPal link in my face. Like I just met you and you’re already starting off with this. It’s gotten to the point where I just instantly block people the moment they beg. It’s annoying and I fucking hate it. Like get a damn job if you’re so fucking hungry all the time. The reason I want to be a feeder is to indulge in the fetish with a like minded person, not take care of an adult baby.


Long story short, I’m really over the beggars, the scammers and the creeps. And I may just quit the feeder thing as a whole for good. It’s probably for the best at this point. Just too much toxicity and e-begging

DanielAviation:
That's how I have felt for a really long time. Especially with here & Feabie. It sucks. I have honestly just disliked interacting with people on these sites because a few people have just been so unbelievably toxic and incredibly rude.


I’ve found it to be way worse on feabie so I tend to avoid going there as much
2 months

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Attaker2z   United States
Joined 5 months
DanielAviation:
I'll be real, Feabie was so aggressive. It's been a bit more manipulative here (probably because people are more subtle here)... But some of the people Here have been so unbelievably rude.


Just keep your chin up and try to enjoy yourself without the vulnerability
2 months

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Jeansoverallfreak   Germany
Joined 3 years
I have come to terms with the fact that as a feeder I will not find a suitable woman in any forum. Most FAs or feeders become gainers. Like me. If you then still let the sex component out, then you find like-minded people with whom you can talk. Unfortunately, I can only live out the kink really alone.
2 months

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Taffer   United States
Joined 2 years
It's easy to despair in this community.
Prioritize your mental health and don't let the loud bad actors form your experience.
2 months

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SpiritualRabbit   United States
Joined 2 years
Naive, trusting fool that I am, I just recently got scammed pretty hard on Feabie. Yes, I'm with you, no more getting involved with scammers, and beggars.

Depressing as it was, it provided me with more of an assurance of who I am and what I like. A mini-awakening I suppose. And while the outcome of being scammed hurt me, I cannot deny that the illusionary relationship was not enticing(when I was in denial).

The goal then should be to find a relationship for real. The reward is still worth the effort even if we have to trudge through the muck to do so. You are not alone.
2 months
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