General

Are we turning into feabie?

Hiccupx:
I would say that in general people are less responsive than they were, not just here but on most sites. They seem less inclined to make connections, and many BBW dating sites and smaller sites have died as a consequence. People are more used to content and connections being delivered to them, rather than reaching out to get it.


first, thank you for keeping ff going, and doing the great work that you do!

the portion of your post which i quoted really resonated with me, i think you're right. i see the volume of meaningful engagement dropping a lot, and quickly, and it i think the "scroll of doom" mentality of big-tech social media sites is a big part of it. they provide a passive feed of stimulation and distraction, and cut down on actual meaningful interaction and discussion.

i find ff and feabie very, very different. just the presence of these forums, where you can engage in a topic back-and-forth over time is such a huge benefit. feabie just has the "scroll of doom." if you didn't see it in the last three hours, it doesn't exist.

long live ff!
2 weeks

Are we turning into feabie?

Pearl:
I am not disagreeing about the fact that physical attraction is part of intimacy. WhT i am getting at is the lack of consistency and transparency in how people are engaging on these sites.

A large number of users don’t actually provide any clear or recent photos of themselves upfront, yet still expect others to establish attraction early on or move conversations off-platform quickly. In contrast, many people do share content or photos openly, which naturally creates an imbalance in what each person is working with at the start.

That being said it is hard to establish mutual attraction as there can’t really be mutual if only one side is visible before expectations are formed. And when that visibility only happens later, on offsite chats/text mesages, it can understandably lead to mismatched expectations.

So it’s not about being “shallow” or claiming that people cant make life long connections on here. It's about keeping expectations realistic and realizing that the shift comes from people being taken advantage of because of the inherent unbalance mentioned prior. Additionally, there’s often an expectation that access to kink-related content, attention, or conversation should be freely available, while any form of monetization is criticized as “inauthentic” or “not genuine.” That creates a contradiction where one side’s effort and boundaries are dismissed, while still expecting full access to what they provide.


I agree with all of this. Very well stated.
2 weeks

Are we turning into feabie?

The fact is this isn't a dating site so much as a fetish appreciation site. So it will always be different, as long as that identity is maintained. Dating is part of that, and why Kita is here personally, but it isn't the totality.

It could be made more clear to newer users that this is not explicitly a dating site. It has functions to facilitate it, but that isn't what it is for.

Part of why Feabie has become such a toxic space is that it is essentially a Dating App/OnlyFans Clone combo. That is where the problems come from. As to how they emerge those problems? Well, they allow a financial incentive to exist within their P2P framework. Users can use the site to engage with feederism from a distance and covertly.

Kita is of the opinion that this covert-ness is the source of the issue, and why we say people need to just learn to deal with the shame in a more healthy way. Being open and proud of the kink, and making spaces where it can be a source of pride (and thus not something to be always hidden and taboo) would do a lot to curb things like beggers and scammers.

Shame is the community killer. Telling people to hide it encourages the shame. People are gonna judge the fetish, that's reality, but resisting and spiting that judgment is way healthier for your mind than acquiescing to the judgment. Kita's perspective as an illeic speaker and a transwoman inform this opinion. Are we mistreated? Yes. But those people are *bad people* for doing so to us. It is much the same with this.
2 weeks

Are we turning into feabie?

It doesn't help that this website doesn't have a proper blocking feature. You can still see the comments and even avatars of people that you blocked on the forums. I also have heard in the past that blocked people can apparently respond to you. There is one person in particular I don't want to see and they are very active in the community. I can still see their comments on this thread.
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

I block people and they can't respond to me
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

Beachside Farmer:
Over the past few years I've seen a gradual decline of people making connections and seen a larger uptick of connections only with paid benefits. More catfish/scammers/bots/hopeful models have joined recently more than ever before.

It seems like the site changes at will, randomly, and the community is no longer being taken into consideration for what kind of changes should come to this site.

These were big red flag downfalls for feabie and now we see what has occurred to that site today. A shell of its former self.

So are we there? What do we need to do to improve this space?
I pointed this out on Feabie and was banned from it. Apparently Grommer doesn't like criticism
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

Gushloader:
Idk, I'm not as active in the community as I used to be but here are some thoughts:
1. Only dating sites I ever experienced is FF and Feabie, on both there are desperate people, men desperate for women, women desperate for money, this creates a vicious circle. Solving this is not easy, unless we cut down on dating entirely and try to foster a community.
2. Message limits: I always found this stupid: do we want members to communicate or not? How many of you had someone they wanted to contact but couldn't because limits?.
Yes, message limits are limited and Feabie response to messaging it to ban people, In a lot of ways Feabie is hypocritical and has double standards since they do have a section for personal pictures aka porn
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

Reflection Of Perfection:
No. This will never be like Feabie.

Notice nobody from the cliques on there are here? They'd get torn to shreds for pushing their rhetoric on here...and they know it too.
Plus Feabie allows this which is a rule on Fantasy Feeder. Feabie allows porn and has a tab which give people click on called "personal pictures". 6. No pornography
A degree of nudity is allowed on this site, but only if it's tastefully done. Photographs of bare breasts and buttocks are permitted, but no hardcore pornography, erections (clothed or otherwise), masturbation (real or implied), or exposed pubic areas.--Feabie allows pictures, but you request permission from the members. Feabie is like
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

www.grokio.com/ This gets extreme feabie is a part of the grokio community. The FAQ frequently asked questions about grokioa is defunct and not functional. Hmmm… can't reach this page
support.grokiolabs.com’s server IP address could not be found.
Try:

Checking the connection
Checking the proxy, firewall, and DNS settings ---Also none of the sites support vpn To be continued....
1 week

Are we turning into feabie?

Feabie has: Replying to comments is not possible; only liking them is, Server crashes are frequent, Status likes on Feabie.com do not show up on notification, which bars you from knowing the responses of people. Too many notifications and constant reminders may be irritating. There's a lot of sex workers on there, as well as girls asking' for food or content. Popular mainly in the USA. Limited search possibilities for the free members. victimization, politics, activism, and mental illness. The ladies can be real mean to the fellas and the mods aren't doing' nothing' bout it. But if a guy says something' bad about a lady, boom, seven-day ban.
1 week
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