General

So here’s my insight based on personal experience with this particular topic.

I have had an interest with bigger ladies since I was in my preteens in which was also the time that I first discovered the Feedism kink as well (but a bit slightly later). There was something that was very erotic about chubbier bellies and deep belly buttons, especially with the fact that there is a thing that some people would actually want to make themselves bigger to achieve such a thing? That lowkey got me hooked into it.

Now I don’t really ever engage with the kink of feeding and weight gain in my dating life anymore as I used to, due to some bad experiences that almost ruined a past relationship of mine (and even within the community itself). Unless of course the potential partner of mine is actually into Feedism as well, really the only thing how it would work. Plus I also have learned the reality that not all bigger people are the biggest eaters as what’s depicted in media and fetish content. However though with my interest in bellies - that’s not changed.

In my dating life now I do bring Feedism up whenever a dater and I talked about sexual interests. But that’s basically it, ultimately it’s up to her if she wants to practice or invest in the weight gain kink. Even if she doesn’t want to do that, I am personally more than happy to embrace her current body/size right now and find other ways to please each other! Even if this means lots and lots of belly rubbing and love!

Absolutely. And sure it’s going to be different from one person to the next for who you date and end up being in a relationship with. However there are some things that someone should be able to accept certain things and interests about yourself, take my interests for bellies for an example.

If they are willing to accept that from you then that’s great! If not then it’s a potential dealbreaker.

Certainly understandable. And keep in mind, not all who wander are lost! Hoping for the best for you!

Well, I got into horny gainer-brain mode, gained 20kg in 3 months and then we stopped having sex because he didn't find me attractive. Which ended up setting off this whole cascade of things until he tried to break up with me after we had been to a Kesha concert (I immediately said "no, we are breaking up tomorrow, I will not think about you whenever I hear Kesha playing in a supermarket".

It's fine though, after 6 years it needed to be done.

I never told him about my weight gain fetish because I knew his opinions on the subject (he was a doctor and I could tell he would think I was completely insane).

Anyway, long story short, I will never date a civilian again.

I felt very similarly in my long term relationship. If there's love there, it's worth pursuing. We, unfortunately, broke up but not necessarily because of feedism and more about value alignment and the future. It would be great to integrate kink in my future relationship, but I think I'm looking more now for bare minimum the ability to talk about it and integrate it the bedroom via fantasy or talking, even if the weight gain / feeding aspects are absent.

At the end of the day, we live our lives for ourselves. Nobody can choose for you. Thanks for your perspective Torchcacti.

Same.

I can't connect sexually, or romantically, to someone who doesn't share this. It's a core part of me and an exclusive fetish, not a kink. It's too important to me to try to ignore it and be unfulfilled in life.

My past partners have been very / extremely fat and there was no sexual or romantic connection at all. Basically, if they don't feel that desire too then it just feels flat.

Its been a big, and costly, lesson that being with a partner who isn't a feedist, is never going to work.

ETA: I never shared this with them either, but I don't see that I have to share something that they will never understand.

That's the hardest thing. Feedism is impossible to understand for muggle types. Fat or thin it is impossible to get your head around the true nuance of what it means to feel what we all feel.

Xx Lillith Xx
...put it already into the best words!!

Let's add my experienced to it.

I can't connect sexually, or romantically, to someone who doesn't share this. It's a core part of me and an exclusive fetish, not a kink. It's too important to me to try to ignore it and be unfulfilled in life.
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It took me ages to learn this! Each relationship broke up over this one thing over time. If you try to ignore/hide it, it will break free!

My past partners have been very / extremely fat and there was no sexual or romantic connection at all. Basically, if they don't feel that desire too then it just feels flat.
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Absolutely confirmed!!!
I learned, fat women/men are most likely in no way connected to our world. Not a chance to built a positive connection in any way. It was a waste of time, every time!
Sad thing...

Its been a big, and costly, lesson that being with a partner who isn't a feedist, is never going to work.
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Absolutely confirmed!!!
Not a chance to built a positive connection in any way. It was a waste of time, every time!
Sad thing...

The bottom line..
ETA:
I never shared this with them either, but I don't see that I have to share something that they will never understand.[/quote]
Casualmunch:
Anyway, long story short, I will never date a civilian again.
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Absolutely confirmed!!!

Thanks to Lillith bringing the thoughts together!!!