General

I've noticed something and I wonder if this'll resonate with some people:

There are multiple approaches to being a feedee, of course, but I've noticed a certain... desperation in many people, and I wanted to discuss it a bit.

There's something to rebelling against what you were taught, duh


The thing is, if you're doing the thing you're doing in spite of someone, you're still doing it because of them, you know?

It's like going through childhood-teens-young adulthood-adulthood.

As a child, you worry about what people think and listen to your parents.



As a teen, you "don't care" about what people think (aka you care a lot but you huff and pretend you don't), and you rebel against your parents, doing exactly the opposite of what they want.

As a young adult, you start finding yourself and your self-worth, figuring out what *you* want to do and why, even as you're still feeling the shame/guilt and other complex emotions. Your feelings of rebellion to your parents probably ease, but it's more like you admit they were right and figure out between the two where to balance the listening/rebellion scale.

And as an adult, hopefully, you find your way to accepting that others have opinions of you that truly do not matter or affect you in any way, nor can you affect them. You also start realizing that your parents are just people going through life their first time too.



This idea, I feel, applies to a lot of feedees.

People join the feederism community with a *desperation* and an almost feral need to be fat.

I don't think that's the point at all, though. I think the point is to enjoy yourself and *truly* not let others' opinions affect you.

You are your own person for your own reasons. Don't let others dictate your life, regardless of the direction.

So it is

I was very thin as a child, as a teenager and as an adult.

But I always had the dream of living, eating, sleeping and getting fatter like a pig

There's real wisdom in this. In the GLP-1 world, being fat is more punk rock than ever. There's an element of rebellion in the act, and that's cool. I'm here for it, but it really should be an aside, as would preferably be any form of rebellion or other desperation with roots in feedism. To the very fullest extent possible, within the scope of your control, you've gotta live and enjoy life. Whatever that looks like for you.

Your "rebellion" never ends if your parents are some of the worst people you know

It's even worse if they are the root to your trauma and mental health. It baffles me today when I saw a post on Rednote about some Chinese mom yelling at her daughter swimming at some swimming pool in California and some of the comments defended that abusive behavior.

Desire to participate in Feederism is not teenage rebellion. Nor do we think it maps to teenage rebellion. Nor do we think teenage rebellion as a systemic feature of human development actually exists. Nor do we think internal desperation with regards to feederism is directly correlated with external social behaviour.

We would like OP to substantiate these claims with more than anecdote, projection, or baseless speculation...

I think there certainly is a rebellious element in adopting an appearance incongruous with typical beauty standards. I think it's also brave to define beauty for yourself, rather than allowing society to dictate ideals.

That said, I definitely didn't get fat as an act of rebellion. I crossed over from being chubby to being properly obese in first grade, and though my mother was not happy, my hope wasn't to spite her. I just liked being plump, I had a large tummy, and when other kids commented it was getting bigger. I recall feeling motivated to grow even more. By the summer after third grade, I was fattening up by all means possible: snacking at friends house's, stashing treats in my bedroom, etc., and I was pleased with my progress. I weighed myself everyday and used a seamstress tape to measure my belly, which hit 40 inches in fourth grade. By high school, I was wearing a size 28 in US women's clothing. Family, friend's parents, even a couple of teacher's would suggest weight loss tactics, but these comments only made me want to grow more. This wasn't rebellion-- it was just affirmation that my efforts to be obese were paying off. I started stretching my stomach with liquid bloats so I could eat more and more. By graduation, the largest graduation gown I could order was so tight I couldn't zip it. Instead of feeling motivation to lose weight, I was very proud to cross the state with a fat gut bulging out of my gown.