General

I think a lot of us are more in love with the fantasy of gaining than with actual gaining. And I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing.

I mean, what good in this community is that it brings together people who gain, people who want to gain, feeders, encouragers, admirers, and people who mostly just enjoy imagining the whole thing. But sometimes I wonder how many of us would genuinely want our “perfect fantasy” to become completely real.

If you could magically make your ultimate gaining/feeding fantasy happen tomorrow, exactly as you’ve imagined it, but with all the real-world consequences included, would you actually do it?

No reset button. No separating the exciting parts from the inconvenient ones. You get the whole package.

Do you think someone can genuinely be part of the feederism community if they know they’d never want any of their fantasies to happen in real life?

Personally, I think the answer is yes. Fantasy doesn’t have to be a secret plan for reality. But I’m curious whether people here agree. Where’s the line for you between “I fantasize about this” and “I actually want this”?

I can't say I want it now, since I'm not looking for a relationship at this point of my life, but I always did want it.

I don't think it should be the primary focus of a relationship though. I'd want to be with someone I loved through thick and thin, so to speak.

That said, if my partner wanted to gain I'd be behind it. I have had partners who gained (though not on purpose!) and I always enjoyed that a lot.

I admit I'd be opposed to someone gaining to the point the weight became crippling or dangerous. It wouldn't be a dealbreaker if it happened. I'd be gracious about it, especially if it was something she wanted, but it would not be my preference.

My ideal would be someone who was average-sized or even a bit thin to start with and had always wanted to gain by was too conflicted about it to really do it. Then she meets me, and I help her to get to maybe double her original weight. Or at least a size where she could still get around fine, but it would be a bit of a struggle to climb stairs and get up out of chairs, etc.

But I have to admit I'm conflicted on this point...I imagine someone getting to the point it causes mobility problems but finds she enjoys eating and gaining more than ever and wants to keep going. That's hot. So that's a risk, but I'd take it if she would..

It would of made life much easier If I could separate the fantasy & reality but for me knowing the fantasy was obtainable and wasn’t like being the QB for the patriots was the factor that made testing the fantasy in real life impossible to resist

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You expressed this really well, and yes, I think there's absolutely a place here to welcome people who will never live out their fantasies in real life. In fact, I'd venture to say most people with very extreme fantasies don't plan to live them out, and that's okay. In part, that's what this community is for.

I actually did go all in on my fantasy this year. For several months, I lived to stuff as much as my body would hold and to get fatter. I did those things. I chased the euphoria of feeling like my stomach was constantly on the verge of exploding, being unable to move, and seeing more fat pile on every week. The tradeoffs were a loss of mobility, needing help to maintain basic hygiene, the inability to fit in a car and eventually to leave the house, split stretch marks, and finally a major medical emergency. At the same time, part of me is still glad I took it that far. I got bigger than I ever imagined I would and increased my capacity more than I thought was possible. I'm not sure I would have done anything differently even if I knew it would lead to a lengthy hospitalization.

Not all "feedees" want to reach a state of morbid obesity that leaves them incapacitated; there are also "maintainers" people who are happy with their weight and don't wish to get any bigger, for a variety of reasons. In reality, many people are overweight without being disabled or facing major issues, as their excess weight isn't extreme enough to cause life-altering difficulties; they can still be classified as "gainers" or "feedees," just like thinner people who want to put on weight.
I am a "feeder," and I enjoy filling up my feedees' bellies I love the look of a full, bloated stomach but I don't want them to gain so much weight that it becomes debilitating. That’s why I prefer occasional feeding sessions over intensive feeding. What turns me on is seeing them with full bellies, eating like pigs and belching, rather than the actual weight gain itself. I think I’d feel guilty if I actively contributed to another human being's health problems or disability. It is possible to want to gain weight while deciding to stop before becoming incapacitated or risking death due to obesity. There are also those who want to be both fat and muscular. Besides, extreme excess weight doesn't appeal to me aesthetically I don't find it attractive but I am very drawn to men with moderate excess weight; I find it sexy. So, I imagine there are feedees who share my tastes regarding body type and don't want to become morbidly obese, even if they do want to gain weight. I think finding that "happy medium" is possible, though only for some not everyone.