Gaining

I posted this here before, but never really went anywhere with it. I've recently posted this over at Curvage, but have gotten no bites (plenty of views, but no actually responses). I figured I'd give it another go here and see what people had to say.

I haven't opened up about it to my wife (she's still my fiancée for a few months), but I plan to. Simply put, she's currently in Basic Training for the US Army Band, so I haven't had the chance to talk to her about it, but will once we're together when she's stationed later this year. She's a foodee and has openly stated that she'll never stay thin because she loves to eat and I'm going to open up to her before we're married. I love her the way she is (was 170 lbs, but now 150 lbs due to basic training), and we've talked about her softening up and getting a bit back to where she was before she left (being a non-combat soldier, she'll never have to remain that size). I figure if she's alright with it and embraces it, then we can talk about how we'd go along with it. If she says no, then I wouldn't dare push the issue, but I do believe that she has the right to know this part of me before we're together for the rest of our lives.

I never really thought about her gaining. She's always been chubby since we've started dating, and did gain a bit of weight over the past 2 years. I've always enjoyed playing with her belly, and I'd always notice that she was enjoying it as well. I never thought of seeing if she wanted to gain, though I've placed a few hits over the last year (telling her to never lose a pound, that she looked great the way she was, that I'd love for her to get a fatter ass), but up until recently, I've never thought about seeing if she'd really want to gain. I know that I should have mentioned something to her earlier before I proposed, but I know that even if she says no, she won't look at me differently and that we'll be happy no matter what.

Anyone else have a similar situation? If so, how did it go? Any advice?

Figured after 50+ views someone might have posted something

I have an opposite situation. I am in the military reserves and thus have to stay in pretty good shape. My wife has gained a lot of weight over the years, two children, etc. She is at least fifty pounds heavier than when we married, many years ago. I have told I like women with big bellies, and that I adore her body, but she still feels embrarrassed about her weight. Today's society's take on obesity and being overweight is nearly impossible to over come!

Trust me she knows you like big girls. Girls are very perceptive and pick up on context clues and the way you act around people. I told my wife about 1 year into dating and she really thought it was nice I didn't care about her weight gain lol she thought it was cute. Since then she has gone from 130 to 235 with just a little encouragement. So I guess to sum this up good things will happen with time and tell her now before she wonders what other secrets your keeping.

Thanks everyone for the stories/advice. I can't wait to speak to her about all of it, and I have come to the conclusion that I love her and her body the way she is. If she wants to gain, I'm all for it, if she says no, then I'll still be there at her side.

This is a post I made over at Curvage during the same topic, after saying some stupid things at 3am. If anyone would like to go over and read the topic, it's under the same heading (Opening up to a loved one).

I guess what I'm trying to say overall is that I'm not going to force her to gain any weight. I'm going to open the suggestion of it and see where we take it, but I'd never force her to suddenly put everything she's done since August in the trash and force her to fatten up for me. I love her body the way it is, and I always will. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with her and I'm going to cherish every day with her and pamper her like crazy.

There is nothing wrong with bringing it up and seeing where we take it. She may be into it for all I know. We've been together for 2 years and I have noticed a few little things:

- She loves to eat (meals and snacks) and like any relationship, when I eat, she eats (even cold pizza at 2am just cause one of us is hungry)
- She's openly admitted that she's a "foodee" and will never stay thin (she comes from a big Irish-Italian family, and has a wonderful mother that loves to cook (if her mother is a prediction of how she's going to be when we're our own, then she'll end up gaining quite a bit from learning to cook anyway))
- She's never had a problem with her body shape (she always joked "I am in shape, round is a shape"
- Most of her weight is in her belly, butt and chest (all which has shrank since she lost weight) and she wants to fix that after her training
- She knows that I find her body sexy and enjoys when I play with her belly (she loves belly rubs, especially after a meal )
- She's also never had a problem with my body (I've always been big, weighing between 240 - 260) and she loves my belly (so not sure if this makes her an FFA or what, but it does show that she can handle a big belly)

These are just a few observations, but I know that I cannot change who she is or how she wants her body to be. I know that the final decision is completely up to her, but I know she'll never be mad at me for bringing it up and talking about it. After re-reading what I wrote yesterday morning, I do see where it looks like I'm going to change her for me and no one else. I want her to accept her body (chubby or not) and be happy, and I will support her no matter what the result.

That's the plan. I plan to tell her that I miss her curves and softness (which she's already planning on getting back anyway).

The plan we've talked about is that during the first weekend we were together when she's stationed is to stuff her with all the food she's been denied since August. She's never been a huge fast food eater, but she loves Arby's and Taco Bell, so it hurt her to have to cut back on what she got and ate when we'd go out.

My biggest hope is that since she's non-combat, she'll never have to remain in the shape she's in now, which would mean that she could put on as much weight as she wanted and still be employed (which would be fantastic).