General

I often wonder how many people around the world are actually into feedism.

When I look at my message history here and on feabie and Kik and shit plus on previous accounts I’ve had conversations with maybe 500 people.
I’d say roughly 90% have deleted their accounts, whilst 6% are just inactive and 2% come online irregularly and the remaining 2% seem to still be active in the community.

That’s not an exaggeration at all by the way

It makes me a bit sad to think how many hundreds of thousands, or maybe millions of people are suppressing this kink, people who could be connecting with others and potentially enjoying it in a measured way.

There’s a whole range of reasons for leaving which I don’t need to go into but it just hit me because I was chatting to someone who seemed to have a very grounded take on this fetish and they told me “don’t worry I know how to balance this fetish with my life and I’m not going anywhere” abs sure enough they just deleted their account.

It makes me question why I should bother connecting with anyone who isn’t local (even then they usually leave before I can connect with them)

Do you feel like anything could be done to encourage users to stick around? Maybe being harsher on users who have been reported for harrassment? Maybe more of us have to reach out to people and chat more genuinely about how they’re going? Maybe you should have to earn the privilege to message people? Or maybe this is just how it is.

It irritates me how many people will make an account then delete then make another account. Then they will try and talk like I don’t remember the first one. It makes me think they are embarrassed or ashamed. I have given the benefit of the doubt but then the delete again. 😂 I don’t play games like that.

They are embarrassed and you can tell from the tonality of their message but they are not used to this life of ours. I am superobese and I can't hide the gut that I took effort to grow so why be ashamed of it

People always like when things cost money so maybe hide more content behind paywall, that's the easiest way really....

Never mind the fact that I'm fairly certain that there's only about 5 or 6 people who are legit feedee's on the entire planet and not just selling a fantasy as sex workers (nothing wrong with that line of work, just saying), I'm real tired of making seemingly legit connections with these one in a billion needle in a haystack feedee's and engaging in these multi thousand word emails with them while knowing that there's a 99.99999% they're gonna delete their profile soon and go missing. When I get the rare message from someone in this community, I'm pretty apathetic right off the bat. It's like I can see a month into the future and I just can't keep doing it to myself. It's at this point where I'm just as guilty of disappearing because I'm unable to keep having that happen over and over and over again

I second what BreadZeppelin said. I feel like I am so sensitive to communicate that I'm not a creep, that I don't even know how to talk about feedee/feeder stuff in conversation when I meet that 'one every 5-10 years feedee connection'. It's like this bubble that lands in my hand, and there's nothing in the universe that can stop it from popping in a split second. It's a lot easier to break the ice in person, like at dances. But you see these feedee's with feeders they met online and I just don't know how they do it. How are they talking about how huge and fat they want them to be, how they want to encourage them to never get out of bed and become lazy fat whales, while still letting them know you are interested in them as a person and partner? It's feels like trying to hold your breath and breath at the same time.

Yeah. I feel the same way. If you want to make things even more extreme try to find a female feeder I think the odds are better for getting hit by asteroid than finding a real female feeder who isn't pretending to get money or catfish you.

Masuli, that's very true. It's a frustrating divide to see. Female feedee's (in general) expect to be paid for fat chat by male feeders, and to be given paypal for food. But this does not go both ways. Because the same is true for female feeders! It's not uncommon when you find a FFA on feabie to see them link their paypal account and be expected to be paid first to interact with you (you, aka the elusive precious dedicated feedee who apparently only has value when you were born with a vagina). Why are men, and those who present as men, or even gender neutral people with male bodies, completely unable to monetize their fetish like women are able to without catering to the gay community? Hansi's superchubs, and other USSBHM marketplaces seem to be only patronized by men. I''d love to study the history of this. Sex work is almost exclusively purchased by men. That's really interesting to me and I'd love to get closer to an answer that goes beyond our western puritan roots. Is it something deeper? How we are wired? Or is it just a cultural holdover from our more sexist past?

That is so true.

It seems that all that BHM porn is catered towards gay community or men who likes men.

Like there are so little porn that has female feeder feeding a male feedee. This is really rare and shows how few female feeders actually there are.

There are more female feeders feeding woman videos around but that's a "lesbian" thing so it's automatically more popular.

Here is the truth, some folks on here can be weird and will just block you just because they were in the chat talking to someone who ghosted them and then they will block you just for looking on their page; you have to let it fall off you like teflon