Fat experiences

Hi! I love to gain weight , i love how big and jiggly my belly is.

But… sometimes i regrett how much bad food im stuffing. Becouse of my Heath. Im so confused….

And… i have all my life suffered from eatingdisorder and extrem extrem feeling of Shame about my belly. I hide my belly from everyone. i even couldent in many years showed my belly to my boyfriend. I was very Thin….

Now i have taking so many steps forward. I love to show my belly offentlic . But. I have very much anxety over my friends, family and people how know me . I feel so much shame when they see how fat my belly are. Its feels like they see me in a bad way.

Is it someone how recognize this to ?

How can i be free and do what i want witout carring how other people thinks?

I'm always worried about what others think of my gain. It's especially apparent when I see photos of myself that others have taken and see how big my belly looks in those photos.

I am most concerned what family think of my gaining; i.e. my grown children, my mother and siblings.

I'm 68 years old and I still have these thoughts, your are not alone!

Even though I have been told how much better I look, I still keep my shirt on when outside. With all the food I've been given over the last year or so, it seems those around me don't have a problem with how I look. I don't think they're being mean or vindictive by giving me the food.

I've always accepted people the way they are, except for myself, I guess.

I do worry about it, but my particular situation leave little alternatives in changing my body.

Back senior year of highschool, I had stage 1 Spinal Cancer. Those, luckily benign, cells are still clustered to the bottom of my spine. This has had the side effect of causing me a shit load of pain yo my torso, and gets worse as it gets hotter. The high 90's I risk passing out from pain. This made me quit football and MMA, and gain about 100lbs in a few years.

With how much I work late nights and going to masters school, I have little time to meal prep, (let alone finding food I can stomach, I've always hated vegetables and their rancid texture and smells), and my pain making it just about impossible to work out like I used to... Yeah, not good stuff.

Insurance this year is finally covering gyms that have pools, so I'm hoping to find time to explore that. But doubt that will lead to excessive weight loss *shrug*

It's natural to have people 'worried for your health' even though your fat may take their minds off whatever addictions/issues they themselves may have.
If you want to be 'acceptable' then feel free and do so. If you truly want to live out this lifestyle, others opinions can be noted though if they do not respect your wishes, sometimes you may have to keep your circle small and distance yourself.
Those from tight knit families and small towns will find that challenging as you're raised to do things together.
For some, It's exciting for some to sneak food but loses luster when $ spent is thrown out by those claiming its for your own good.
Best of Luck, down the line regardless which choice is made.

After I told people I was a feeder most of them just found reasons to stop talking to me once they figured out what it was.

I just dont tell anyone anymore. So, yeah, always a little worried.

I mean I guess both - on the side of liking your women Fat or yourself Fat is more of a personal thing that you shouldn’t really feel obligated to let the world or your close friends or family know.

I kind of believe it is left for yourself and if you like your partner if and when you feel it’s time. Obviously, everyone has different personalities, some are more reserved and some are much more open. If you are the open personality type then possibly all of you friend group and family may know that you like your women Fat and making them fatter or you tell them you don’t mind having a huge fat gut and that you even try with every meal to make it even larger…..but I don’t think that is the norm and obviously to varying degrees.

A lot of times whether it be having girlfriends and now your wife that were heavy or gained a lot of weight while they were together with you…..I believe that by deductive reasoning most people would feel that you like your women big and possibly enjoy having them get bigger. Or if you develop a big gut and don’t seemed to be to concerned with it then people around you may come to think that it really doesn’t bother you and you might even like it.

I actually just saw a guy I used to work with who probably packed on 75-100 lbs. mostly all to his huge gut In the last 8 years since I have seen him last, I happened to see him at a baseball game and he was eating massive amounts and plowing through beers happy as can be…..and the first thing that came to my mind was he was very much into his new huge gain and belly and that I have to imagine his wife who o know as well might be a feeder or at least like her new hugely fattened up husband…..with this said I do t think that many other that are not FA’s or like us on this site would think that. Others would have probably been in shock, which I definitely was, but they would think that he was unhappy or his wife must totally be bummed out with her now huge fattened husband.