Sweetfattie:
The heavier you are, the softer a mattress feels, because you have more weight pushing down on it. You will also wear the mattress out faster, which is why models made for heavy sleepers tend to be firmer.
I would recommend a hybrid mattress over a pure memory foam model. Hybrids are cooler and more durable. Look for one with plenty of cushy foam over sturdy springs. That way you get both back support and comfort. Cooling features are a big plus if either of you sleeps hot.
Good luck on your bed hunt! I like a firmer mattress, so I’m afraid I can’t suggest any specific models, but I did a LOT of research on beds for heavy people when I replaced my bed last year.
Many thanks for this! It sounds like we’re on the right track, then, with our desire for the middle ground between too soft and too firm. I’ve been stuck with both extremes in the past and it’s been bad, ha. Main goal for the new one is to comfortably support about 520 combined pounds nightly.
I’m happy to see most of the newfangled brands these days seem to offer x-number of days to try it out after buying it. I presume they’d give a full refund if we end up finding it too soft or too firm?