Fattening others

I became obese kind of by accident…
I’ve always had a thing for making others gain weight it’s been one of my fantasies for as long as I can remember.
I’m a 30-year-old woman who loves encouraging other women to gain, but it’s always been hard for me to find feedees.

Over the years, I ended up gaining a lot myself. I went from 108 lbs to 198 lbs in about 5 years. Now I struggle a bit with mobility, and honestly, I don’t really like my body the way it is. It feels strange almost like a paradox because I find bigger bodies incredibly attractive, yet I don’t like mine.

Does anyone else feel the same way? Or am I the only one?
Sometimes I look at myself and think, “wow, this body is beautiful,” but only when I imagine it’s someone else’s. Then I remember it’s mine, lol.

It used to be a hot/cold cycle with me. I’m loving how I look from a kink perspective, but at the end of the day, if you get large enough you will get limitations on yourself and others may treat you different and you have to be ok with that. As I’ve gotten older people cared less or I guess didn’t know me when i was much smaller. So I guess it got easier from that angle. I also started to like how I got treated different. I leaned into it instead of away I guess. Usually I started to notice feeling significantly lazy or mobility issues after gaining a good amount of weight fast. If I became a little more active for a bit, that weight started to feel normal to me. Don’t get me wrong, I no longer jump over things the way I used to or run nearly as fast (or run much at all) but I don’t get plain tired from walking like I used to after my rapid gaining periods.

I think if you had a feeder who worshipped and praised your body, you would think vastly differently about yourself