I believe you are finding the answer to your original questions in this post. One of the great rules of writing is to write what you know.
And you know pain and perfectionism quite well. Write that. It fits well with the journey you have done In mind and it gives you a theme to go along with weight gain and appetite — both of which are frenemies of the quest for perfection.
And this is a quest or a journey of your protagonist — perhaps an actual road trip. Or just a journey through cultures and cuisines. It doesn’t have to be an actual road trip although that seems appropriate for a story-game. It could be just a character very much like you, in that room alone with your feelings of imperfection and an appetite you can’t control.
Do take care of your mental and physical and emotional health though. And writing can be part of this care.
And you know pain and perfectionism quite well. Write that. It fits well with the journey you have done In mind and it gives you a theme to go along with weight gain and appetite — both of which are frenemies of the quest for perfection.
And this is a quest or a journey of your protagonist — perhaps an actual road trip. Or just a journey through cultures and cuisines. It doesn’t have to be an actual road trip although that seems appropriate for a story-game. It could be just a character very much like you, in that room alone with your feelings of imperfection and an appetite you can’t control.
Do take care of your mental and physical and emotional health though. And writing can be part of this care.
lydsville:
Givne how much this problem has been stressing me out and somethings that happened to me recent that I didn't go into here I decided to ask for help on mental health and someone has pointed out what might actually be my issue, I'm a perfectionist (I knew this but thought, whatever there are Hollywood directors that are perfectionists who cna somehow pump out movies easily and be okay, so I shouldn't have any problems right...)
So my problem is exactly that, I don't ever want to just make something, I want to make the best thing I can possible make at the time and then the next time go even further and even better. Alas, this might be what could kill me in the end as I have put my body on the line for this more than once.
I've refused to let myself out of my room to eat anything until I get something done with the project, refused to let myself sleep until I get something done, both enough until the point where I feel myself about to pass out or even after I already have, [placed myself into situation which I knew would negatively affect me and still did it because in my won words "the project is worth more than me."
So now I honestly have to ask a question that I've been avoiding, I want to make a fetish game unlike all the others I've seen that would have an enriching story and beautiful graphics, something that is actually fun while at the same time is a full gameplay experience and not just easy fap material, but maybe I'm not the one who can do it.
The problem is that I feel if I get it wrong on the first go then we can't go back and do it again, we'd need to go through all of this again, we'd need a new idea to not be called out for using the same one again and then we'd have to go through all the struggles of the first project just to possibly meet the same result and given the first result was failure then I'll take that in the wrong way to mean no one is interested in this project at all and therefore there is no point in trying again.
So should I perhaps cancel this project and try to do something to escape worrying about perfection in something like this somehow, or should I keep going but figure out someway to escape these pitfalls?
I don't know how to escape these pitfalls and I don't know where to ask. I feel like I'm bringing others down in this pit of hell with me by asking too and I'd rather not. That said, I don't want to just cancel the project but what choice have I, if I can't do it then I just can't do it so what's the point in trying?
I'm sorry, I just don't know what to do. (I hope I didn't bog anyone down with this post, sorry)
Givne how much this problem has been stressing me out and somethings that happened to me recent that I didn't go into here I decided to ask for help on mental health and someone has pointed out what might actually be my issue, I'm a perfectionist (I knew this but thought, whatever there are Hollywood directors that are perfectionists who cna somehow pump out movies easily and be okay, so I shouldn't have any problems right...)
So my problem is exactly that, I don't ever want to just make something, I want to make the best thing I can possible make at the time and then the next time go even further and even better. Alas, this might be what could kill me in the end as I have put my body on the line for this more than once.
I've refused to let myself out of my room to eat anything until I get something done with the project, refused to let myself sleep until I get something done, both enough until the point where I feel myself about to pass out or even after I already have, [placed myself into situation which I knew would negatively affect me and still did it because in my won words "the project is worth more than me."
So now I honestly have to ask a question that I've been avoiding, I want to make a fetish game unlike all the others I've seen that would have an enriching story and beautiful graphics, something that is actually fun while at the same time is a full gameplay experience and not just easy fap material, but maybe I'm not the one who can do it.
The problem is that I feel if I get it wrong on the first go then we can't go back and do it again, we'd need to go through all of this again, we'd need a new idea to not be called out for using the same one again and then we'd have to go through all the struggles of the first project just to possibly meet the same result and given the first result was failure then I'll take that in the wrong way to mean no one is interested in this project at all and therefore there is no point in trying again.
So should I perhaps cancel this project and try to do something to escape worrying about perfection in something like this somehow, or should I keep going but figure out someway to escape these pitfalls?
I don't know how to escape these pitfalls and I don't know where to ask. I feel like I'm bringing others down in this pit of hell with me by asking too and I'd rather not. That said, I don't want to just cancel the project but what choice have I, if I can't do it then I just can't do it so what's the point in trying?
I'm sorry, I just don't know what to do. (I hope I didn't bog anyone down with this post, sorry)
3 years