General

Zarathustra:
There's very low 'supply' of real, actual feeders, demand is disproportionately high. Seems like even being fed itself is a privilege a very few experience.

LydiaFatOttter:
Sadly it is worst male feedees and it sucks for them

Munchies:
As a female feeder, I struggle to have empathy for the male feedee plight - specifically the straight ones. From where I sit, it's a problem of their own making.

Don't get me wrong. There are some genuinely good dudes out there that are out here struggling. If you're one of those, I'm not talking about you.

I can't tell you just how many times a male feedee or mutual gainer has slid into my DMs and been horrible to me. They think they're entitled to my time, body, and mind. At best, they're so desperate that they come off as creepy and clingy. At worst, I get lock-you-up-in-my-basement vibes.

Sometimes, they even come out the gate with the crazy. It was at it's worst when I was new, but most people know better than to step to me like that. But I still get the creeps when I pop into chat. They don't even back off when I tell them I'm not interested or I have a feedee boyfriend. Lots of blatant requests to be my side hoe because they want a girl with a pulse to fatten them up.

I'm a special kind of crazy, so I can handle them just fine. But your average female feeder or FA is just going to leave. It's a snake eating it's tail. They are so desperate for female feeders that they chase off the female feeders that do so up.

It's sadder when they harass the gay ones. Like, my guy. She is a lesbian. You never had a chance, to begin with.

Now, I can't speak for the gay male feedees. Someone else will have to speak for them.

LydiaFatOttter:
Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Zarathustra:
There's very low 'supply' of real, actual feeders, demand is disproportionately high. Seems like even being fed itself is a privilege a very few experience.

LydiaFatOttter:
Sadly it is worst male feedees and it sucks for them

Munchies:
As a female feeder, I struggle to have empathy for the male feedee plight - specifically the straight ones. From where I sit, it's a problem of their own making.

Don't get me wrong. There are some genuinely good dudes out there that are out here struggling. If you're one of those, I'm not talking about you.

I can't tell you just how many times a male feedee or mutual gainer has slid into my DMs and been horrible to me. They think they're entitled to my time, body, and mind. At best, they're so desperate that they come off as creepy and clingy. At worst, I get lock-you-up-in-my-basement vibes.

Sometimes, they even come out the gate with the crazy. It was at it's worst when I was new, but most people know better than to step to me like that. But I still get the creeps when I pop into chat. They don't even back off when I tell them I'm not interested or I have a feedee boyfriend. Lots of blatant requests to be my side hoe because they want a girl with a pulse to fatten them up.

I'm a special kind of crazy, so I can handle them just fine. But your average female feeder or FA is just going to leave. It's a snake eating it's tail. They are so desperate for female feeders that they chase off the female feeders that do so up.

It's sadder when they harass the gay ones. Like, my guy. She is a lesbian. You never had a chance, to begin with.

Now, I can't speak for the gay male feedees. Someone else will have to speak for them.

LydiaFatOttter:
Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Munchies:
I wouldn't say men and women necessarily choose their SOs differently. If you are socialized a certain way, you'll look for an SO like you've been raised to look for one. But if you look up how men and women choose partners, you'll find variations. And if you hang out with enough people, you'll realize there's no gender-specific guideline.

Heck, when my partner and I met, we'd planned for it to be a one-off bit of fun. But it organically grew into something more.

This boils down to a basic lack of respect and seeing women as objects instead of people.

Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Munchies:
I wouldn't say men and women necessarily choose their SOs differently. If you are socialized a certain way, you'll look for an SO like you've been raised to look for one. But if you look up how men and women choose partners, you'll find variations. And if you hang out with enough people, you'll realize there's no gender-specific guideline.

Heck, when my partner and I met, we'd planned for it to be a one-off bit of fun. But it organically grew into something more.

This boils down to a basic lack of respect and seeing women as objects instead of people.

LydiaFatOttter:
Not to go too 100% nerd on you, but there is a thing that sex plays in mate selection, but this is the wrong place for a science talk.

Also, someone like me who has seen both sides of the gender experience, there is 100% a difference.

Nycfa:
The chief has spoken. Another thread that should be just shut down now …

Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Munchies:
I wouldn't say men and women necessarily choose their SOs differently. If you are socialized a certain way, you'll look for an SO like you've been raised to look for one. But if you look up how men and women choose partners, you'll find variations. And if you hang out with enough people, you'll realize there's no gender-specific guideline.

Heck, when my partner and I met, we'd planned for it to be a one-off bit of fun. But it organically grew into something more.

This boils down to a basic lack of respect and seeing women as objects instead of people.

LydiaFatOttter:
Not to go too 100% nerd on you, but there is a thing that sex plays in mate selection, but this is the wrong place for a science talk.

Also, someone like me who has seen both sides of the gender experience, there is 100% a difference.

Munchies:
That's not what I'm getting at. I won't deny that men and women approach things differently. But a lot of that is nurture over nature.

Here's a quick and dirty about what I mean:

psychcentral.com/blog/love-matters/2018/08/why-we-choose-the-mates-we-do-and-how-to-choose-the-best-mate-for-you

I've never put much stock in the opinions of evolutionary psychology. It has a male, white, Western, cishet, traditional viewpoint. And while there's nothing wrong with being a white Western cishet traditional man, you have to admit it has a very limited viewpoint.

Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Munchies:
I wouldn't say men and women necessarily choose their SOs differently. If you are socialized a certain way, you'll look for an SO like you've been raised to look for one. But if you look up how men and women choose partners, you'll find variations. And if you hang out with enough people, you'll realize there's no gender-specific guideline.

Heck, when my partner and I met, we'd planned for it to be a one-off bit of fun. But it organically grew into something more.

This boils down to a basic lack of respect and seeing women as objects instead of people.

LydiaFatOttter:
Not to go too 100% nerd on you, but there is a thing that sex plays in mate selection, but this is the wrong place for a science talk.

Also, someone like me who has seen both sides of the gender experience, there is 100% a difference.

Munchies:
That's not what I'm getting at. I won't deny that men and women approach things differently. But a lot of that is nurture over nature.

Here's a quick and dirty about what I mean:

psychcentral.com/blog/love-matters/2018/08/why-we-choose-the-mates-we-do-and-how-to-choose-the-best-mate-for-you

I've never put much stock in the opinions of evolutionary psychology. It has a male, white, Western, cishet, traditional viewpoint. And while there's nothing wrong with being a white Western cishet traditional man, you have to admit it has a very limited viewpoint.

Enas:
Or the lack of nurture. The amount of people who sadly end up having their lives sacrificed for the profit motive (instead of doing other thigns like taking *good* care of children) seems to be growing by the day!

Yeah, I don't hate the good ones, but they know who they are.

Men who don't understand the social order and just want to gain stuff.

They also don't understand how men and women select mates in other ways, and that girls don't want the things that dudes like.

Of course, doing this with other men works out fine, to be honest, even better in hetero relationships, as they are both fully eager whenever.

Straight men acting like gay men towards women means it just won't work.

I hate it, and what's worse, those people are the ones firing off the most DMs, PMs, and replies, as they can't find someone.

Munchies:
I wouldn't say men and women necessarily choose their SOs differently. If you are socialized a certain way, you'll look for an SO like you've been raised to look for one. But if you look up how men and women choose partners, you'll find variations. And if you hang out with enough people, you'll realize there's no gender-specific guideline.

Heck, when my partner and I met, we'd planned for it to be a one-off bit of fun. But it organically grew into something more.

This boils down to a basic lack of respect and seeing women as objects instead of people.

LydiaFatOttter:
Not to go too 100% nerd on you, but there is a thing that sex plays in mate selection, but this is the wrong place for a science talk.

Also, someone like me who has seen both sides of the gender experience, there is 100% a difference.

Munchies:
That's not what I'm getting at. I won't deny that men and women approach things differently. But a lot of that is nurture over nature.

Here's a quick and dirty about what I mean:

psychcentral.com/blog/love-matters/2018/08/why-we-choose-the-mates-we-do-and-how-to-choose-the-best-mate-for-you

I've never put much stock in the opinions of evolutionary psychology. It has a male, white, Western, cishet, traditional viewpoint. And while there's nothing wrong with being a white Western cishet traditional man, you have to admit it has a very limited viewpoint.

Enas:
Or the lack of nurture. The amount of people who sadly end up having their lives sacrificed for the profit motive (instead of doing other thigns like taking *good* care of children) seems to be growing by the day!

Munchies:
Enas, I am confused. How does this tie in into anything either party has said?

Munchies:
That's not what I'm getting at. I won't deny that men and women approach things differently. But a lot of that is nurture over nature.

Here's a quick and dirty about what I mean:

psychcentral.com/blog/love-matters/2018/08/why-we-choose-the-mates-we-do-and-how-to-choose-the-best-mate-for-you

I've never put much stock in the opinions of evolutionary psychology. It has a male, white, Western, cishet, traditional viewpoint. And while there's nothing wrong with being a white Western cishet traditional man, you have to admit it has a very limited viewpoint.

Enas:
Or the lack of nurture. The amount of people who sadly end up having their lives sacrificed for the profit motive (instead of doing other thigns like taking *good* care of children) seems to be growing by the day!

Munchies:
Enas, I am confused. How does this tie in into anything either party has said?

Enas:
Im talking about the lack of socialization in general. People rarely talk with other people of different age groups (that also have more experience on almost all aspects of life)

I mean the topic is kinda... Why not female feeders around? I have a few ideas. think of a very stereotypical bad male attitude. Dude that exclusively hangs out "with the boys" and never gets taught why to respect women (and other people in general) but instead his social enviroment pushes him in the direction of the attitude that to have a girlfriend is a man's trophy.

That's a very specific example, but in general the problem is ignorance on people, i think. Wich is caused by the lack of care for the reasons i mentioned earlier. I hope my point is at least somewhat clear?

Munchies:
That's not what I'm getting at. I won't deny that men and women approach things differently. But a lot of that is nurture over nature.

Here's a quick and dirty about what I mean:

psychcentral.com/blog/love-matters/2018/08/why-we-choose-the-mates-we-do-and-how-to-choose-the-best-mate-for-you

I've never put much stock in the opinions of evolutionary psychology. It has a male, white, Western, cishet, traditional viewpoint. And while there's nothing wrong with being a white Western cishet traditional man, you have to admit it has a very limited viewpoint.

Enas:
Or the lack of nurture. The amount of people who sadly end up having their lives sacrificed for the profit motive (instead of doing other thigns like taking *good* care of children) seems to be growing by the day!

Munchies:
Enas, I am confused. How does this tie in into anything either party has said?

Enas:
Im talking about the lack of socialization in general. People rarely talk with other people of different age groups (that also have more experience on almost all aspects of life)

I mean the topic is kinda... Why not female feeders around? I have a few ideas. think of a very stereotypical bad male attitude. Dude that exclusively hangs out "with the boys" and never gets taught why to respect women (and other people in general) but instead his social enviroment pushes him in the direction of the attitude that to have a girlfriend is a man's trophy.

That's a very specific example, but in general the problem is ignorance on people, i think. Wich is caused by the lack of care for the reasons i mentioned earlier. I hope my point is at least somewhat clear?

Munchies:
It is clearer, yes.

I don't think it's entirely ignorance. There are many a guy who knows better but chooses not to be. You see it a lot from the guys who are cheating on their wives. But the worse ones are the "enlightened men".


These guys think that because the have all the "correct opinions" they are good people. But they still feel entitled to women for being "a good person."

I encounter both groups fairly regularly. The cheaters will treat women in ways their spouses wouldn't tolerate. The enlightened men will say all the right words for a while. However, if they are called out for saying or doing something out of picket, they will lash out.

Still, you're not entirely wrong.