VisibleBellyOutline:
I know what you mean. I became a kind of feeder and feedee in one. It's so liberating to just eat whatever you feel like and see what happens. I never really had much muscle, so I had to basically learn to stuff myself until my appetite increased. It's exciting to suddenly notice fat appearing in places you never would have guessed it would. I remember feeling disappointed that my belly wasn't bulging over my waistband like I wanted it to, but realising I couldn't fasten my shirt up. I then realised it was because I had grown love handles! That was pretty hot. And not being able to fit my ass into my underwear. That type of thing feels amazing.
That sounds pretty amazing . I've been doing a gaining/stuffing challenge after years of being a FA and It's felt pretty good gorging on fattening foods and stuffing myself much more frequently. I've gained 10+ pounds in the past 3 weeks. I've definitely been less conflicted about gaining/getting fat since starting this challenge, but I've noticed recently whenever I have some slight doubts about gaining, I end up stuffing myself with 3000-4500 calories and think, "oh well, maybe if I change my mind I can stop tomorrow" (the desire to stop gets smaller and smaller as I continue to get bigger and bigger).