Fattening others

Fattening boyfriend

Angy523:
I know there are already some topics with the same subject, but maybe I'll find some similar situations with mine.

Soo, long story short, I would like my boyfriend fatter, but he is losing weight. Ofc this doesn't change how I feel about him and I won't force anything, but I don't understand why. When I met him, he was 10kgs heavier than he is now. He actually was joking about his belly and he always told me even I don't like his belly, I will get used to it. For some reason, he thought all my exs had 6 packs and he still thinks I would prefer a boyfriend with abs, but I assured him all my exs had bellies and I don't care about having abs. He started losing weight on purpose and he wants to get abs now. I tried to tease him telling him he'll have a belly in the next years and he always told me he doesn't mind that.

It should be easier for him to gain weight since his eating habits are pretty much helpful. He likes sweets and sometimes he drinks just soda (or at least he used to, now he is drinking less soda...he actually didn't drink it for some weeks, now he started to do it again). The only problem is that when he is around me sometimes he skips meals because I do so (lately I convinced him to eat even when I don't, but I still think he is eating less than he needs). I know in the past, when he was 15kgs heavier than he is now, he used to eat even 2 pizzas, but now he said half of one pizza is enough for him. Also, during these months he has some important exams which keep him busy and he doesn't always have time to eat.

Any suggestions?

TheWhipHand:
Tough one. Maybe try finding out why he feels the need to lose weight. My little husband had been a chubby little boy, but had been put on a strict diet. Over time he internalised the need to be thinner, and it took a while to get him out of that mindset.
Secretly he was a little butterball at heart - he loves cakes, cookies and sweets - he was only resisting because he had been influenced.
When you go out, go to a place with good desserts, and order one for yourself, even if you have no intention of eating it. Watch what he does. Does he simply not eat it? Or does he eat it up greedily, just trying to be healthy? Mine would do the latter, so I knew he had a little fattie inside.


They figured this out ages ago.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

Angy523:
I would like my boyfriend fatter, but he is losing weight… he wants to get abs now… He likes sweets

TheWhipHand:
My little husband had been a chubby little boy, but had been put on a strict diet…. I knew he had a little fattie inside.


The basic difference between gaining and losing fat is whether the metabolism is burning fat or carbohydrates for fuel. That is determined by macros, but also by fat cells. A chubby boy will have the fat cells and inability to tolerate carbs to get chubby again, even if they diet. And if they plump up enough the fat cells will double and double again, enabling prodigious weight gain.

But someone who was lean as a child and walks or bicycles miles a day can cut back on sweets and lose fat fairly easily. The EU lifestyle is more amenable to this than the US where we drive everywhere and the younger generation is 30+ pounds heavier than their parents at the same age. As they age they will grow massive.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

Angy523:
I would like my boyfriend fatter, but he is losing weight… he wants to get abs now… He likes sweets

TheWhipHand:
My little husband had been a chubby little boy, but had been put on a strict diet…. I knew he had a little fattie inside.

Fatrnfatr:
The basic difference between gaining and losing fat is whether the metabolism is burning fat or carbohydrates for fuel. That is determined by macros, but also by fat cells. A chubby boy will have the fat cells and inability to tolerate carbs to get chubby again, even if they diet. And if they plump up enough the fat cells will double and double again, enabling prodigious weight gain.

But someone who was lean as a child and walks or bicycles miles a day can cut back on sweets and lose fat fairly easily. The EU lifestyle is more amenable to this than the US where we drive everywhere and the younger generation is 30+ pounds heavier than their parents at the same age. As they age they will grow massive.


2 years

Fattening boyfriend

First off munchies is fucking hilarious (and correct) but I was interested in the small note about sf sodas softening up the aforementioned boyfriend. There are a million studies on it without a clear consensus but quite a few (especially the non industry funded tests) point towards stuff like aspartame actually causing weight gain specifically. Some of the tests on rats that it caused wg on seemed fairly conclusive. Here is the article I referenced to refresh my memory usrtk.org/sweeteners/aspartame-weight-gain/,People%20who%20regularly%20consume%20artificial%20sweeteners%20are%20at%20increased%20risk,in%20Trends%20in%20Endocrinology%20%26%20Metabolism.

That aside I've personally found sparkling water to be a good way to sate soda cravings.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

Sooo...we were happy and everything was really good. He gained more weight and I felt like he is the sexiest in the world and the sex was awesome. Also, I asked him many times if he feels good about his gaining and he told me yes.
But yesterday he wore his uniform after 1 month and he felt his belt was hurting him. And today his annoying mother told him he got too fat. A few hours after that he told me he wants to lose weight until his uniform will fit well again. I tried to tell him to adjust the belt, but he told me it's the right size, but it hurts when he sits and the belly hangs over it...or when he bends. So I had to accept this argument. Ofc I don't want him to feel pain.

Before judging me again, I want to tell you that I LOVE HIM no matter what. And I will love him even if he'll ever be skinny. But I was sad all day because I just know I won't see him as attractive as I see him now. And we had many problems with our sex life because he thought I'm not as attracted to him as I should...it wasn't true, I was either stressed with some exams or having other problems and I explained to him. But he always doubted that.
Idk what I'll do when this would be actually true. I know I won't be attracted as I am now. Ofc I'll still like him, but it will be a difference for sure.
Usually the best solution is to talk to him. But how should I tell him something like this? I would be selfish af. And I love him and I want to support his decision. But this just makes me sad...he also saw I was sad today and asked me to explain it and I tried to find an excuse.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

Sooo...we were happy and everything was really good. He gained more weight and I felt like he is the sexiest in the world and the sex was awesome. Also, I asked him many times if he feels good about his gaining and he told me yes.
But yesterday he wore his uniform after 1 month and he felt his belt was hurting him. And today his annoying mother told him he got too fat. A few hours after that he told me he wants to lose weight until his uniform will fit well again. I tried to tell him to adjust the belt, but he told me it's the right size, but it hurts when he sits and the belly hangs over it...or when he bends. So I had to accept this argument. Ofc I don't want him to feel pain.

Before judging me again, I want to tell you that I LOVE HIM no matter what. And I will love him even if he'll ever be skinny. But I was sad all day because I just know I won't see him as attractive as I see him now. And we had many problems with our sex life because he thought I'm not as attracted to him as I should...it wasn't true, I was either stressed with some exams or having other problems and I explained to him. But he always doubted that.
Idk what I'll do when this would be actually true. I know I won't be attracted as I am now. Ofc I'll still like him, but it will be a difference for sure.
Usually the best solution is to talk to him. But how should I tell him something like this? I would be selfish af. And I love him and I want to support his decision. But this just makes me sad...he also saw I was sad today and asked me to explain it and I tried to find an excuse.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

MalyPrinc:
Break up with him, please. He deserves someone better than you.


I told him a random guy has this opinion. He said that guy must be an idiot. I totally agree
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

MalyPrinc:
Break up with him, please. He deserves someone better than you.


I told him a random guy has this opinion. He said that guy must be an idiot. I totally agree
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

MalyPrinc:
Break up with him, please. He deserves someone better than you.

Angy523:
I told him a random guy has this opinion. He said that guy must be an idiot. I totally agree

MalyPrinc:
Maybe if you show him your posts here he'll change his opinion about me.

RegularGhost15:
Yeah so I understand being told you should break up won't work on communicating you're being an asshole, but I do want to emphasize that you ARE being an asshole. If you were a dude complaining that you don't find your GF as attractive anymore because she gained a little weight you'd be rightfully ripped apart, and so I don't have any issue saying you need to reevaluate your feelings here. You're letting sex run your feelings, and I think that's sad for both of you. I think you already understand this since you aren't talking to him about this, but I think you should just so he knows what's going on.


Maybe you don't or can't pay attention, BUT my problem was HOW should I comunicate with him or HOW to not feel sad about this. I didn't ask if I'm wrong or not because guess what: it's OUR relationship, not yours. Everyone can have their own rules for a relationship and we didn't ask for your permission.

We, as a couple, agreed since we first met sex will be 80% of our relationship. And we discuss the possiblity of not being as attractive for each other in the future. We both agreed that we will love each orher anyways, we won't cheat, but we agreed it can happen to not be as attracted if one of us changed how he looks (not when we get old, this was another topic).

I won't consider my boyfriend an asshole if I'll get fat and he won't be as attracted (physically) to me for example or whatever. It's the harsh reality some of you can't accept. In a realationship where sex is very important (and for us it is since it happens like 3-4 times a day or even more if we stay home) it is absolutely normal to care about physical appearance.

BUT this don't change our love. This is the BIG difference between love and physical attraction. If you want to put "=" between those two, it's just your problem. I will love him the same anyway, but the dynamic of our relatiosnhip can change. It will be less about sex and more about hugs maybe, idk.

Also, if this was a big deal for me or us, trust me I wouldn't ask for some random strangers' opinions.
2 years

Fattening boyfriend

Angy523:
Sooo...we were happy and everything was really good. He gained more weight and I felt like he is the sexiest in the world and the sex was awesome. Also, I asked him many times if he feels good about his gaining and he told me yes.
But yesterday he wore his uniform after 1 month and he felt his belt was hurting him. And today his annoying mother told him he got too fat. A few hours after that he told me he wants to lose weight until his uniform will fit well again. I tried to tell him to adjust the belt, but he told me it's the right size, but it hurts when he sits and the belly hangs over it...or when he bends. So I had to accept this argument. Ofc I don't want him to feel pain.

Before judging me again, I want to tell you that I LOVE HIM no matter what. And I will love him even if he'll ever be skinny. But I was sad all day because I just know I won't see him as attractive as I see him now. And we had many problems with our sex life because he thought I'm not as attracted to him as I should...it wasn't true, I was either stressed with some exams or having other problems and I explained to him. But he always doubted that.
Idk what I'll do when this would be actually true. I know I won't be attracted as I am now. Ofc I'll still like him, but it will be a difference for sure.
Usually the best solution is to talk to him. But how should I tell him something like this? I would be selfish af. And I love him and I want to support his decision. But this just makes me sad...he also saw I was sad today and asked me to explain it and I tried to find an excuse.

ForeverFFA:
It's okay to feel disappointment about those kinds of things, and I disagree with other people saying that makes you somehow a bad person for having those feelings. It's important to respect his wishes, obviously, but it sounds like you already know that. Have you thought about asking him if his sudden desire to lose weight is just about the uniform fitting, or if it's something deeper that's concerning him right now? That might be a place to start.


He told me his belly started to get in the way. He can't bend over that easily anymore, he gets tired faster and other things like that. Also, probably it's not that easy to hear from many people that he got fat and he's not looking so good anymore.

I really understand him and I want to support him, but at the same time one part of me just wants to beg him not to lose weight. Ofc I won't do that, I will never accept him doing something for me which makes him unhappy.

It's just...the things were really good and he made it seem like he actually enjoyed his weight gain so I didn't expect this and I'm sad about it.
2 years