Fat experiences

I don't care how old you are, you never forget your elementary school crush.

I was maybe 10 and I remember I was sitting in front of my first cousin. She was older maybe 17 and already about 350-400 I'd estimate now.
I remember looking at those colossal thighs stretching her skirt to a near breaking point. I was totally mesmerized.
Of course, being 10 I had no idea what all this meant. But, now I know, she was one big dish, super energetic and very cool with how big she was. The whole side of that part of my family was growing some huge females and nobody was about dieting.

The "closeted" part might be the problem.

I had such a crush on a chubby friend just before starting high school. He got bigger in high school, and I just thought he had the best body of anyone I knew.

Around the same time I saw a movie or maybe a TV show with Chris Farley and quickly developed my first celebrity crush.

Skinny/average people just never appealed to me, they never really caught my eye.

Years ago, before I became conscious of liking fat guys (I’m gay) I worked with a fat Latino named Hector. He was a very sweet and polite soul. He used the “usted” form of address with me. I told him stop, I was no better than him, no need to be so formal. I really came to like him and even fantasized being with him. I still think of him and still fantasize. I think he was my first fat guy crush. Then I just started noticing other attractive fat guys and came to realize there were too many attractive fat guys in the world for there to be anything wrong with it. I decided I want to get fat like them.

Basically ever since I can remember. I would always look a little longer at fat people in public because the look and shape always really appealed to me than a skinny person. The same thing would happen in school, I wouldn't ever be attracted to or flirt with a skinny or athletic person.

I knew that I liked fat since I was young, probably about 5. I first realized how much I liked fat bodies seeing them first in public but really when I went to school I knew I really wanted to be fat because I would see all the overweight kids at my school and I'd be sooo jealous of how their fat bodies looked and the fact that they were lucky enough to have parents that were less strict than mine about them being a healthy weight

When I was born.

For me I think it's always kinda been there, but I never realized until I was in my teens and started exploring the internet. Seeing pictures of bigger guys and reading stories about guys getting fattened up really made something click for me. Been a feedee ever since but it took years before I actually started acting on it.

I saw a video on YouTube on accident when I was ten. It was of this Italian lady doing a soda stuffing and from then I knew I had an attraction to bigger people and women. I am very closeted about my attraction to women and bigger people. But most of the men I date/ like are bigger in some way.