General

I'm not really understanding the reactions here. If we think it is OK to have a preference for a larger figure, why is not OK to have a preference for a smaller figure? It sounds like the boyfriend did not know how fat was fat. Or maybe he just changed his mind. In any case, it would appear that the two are no longer compatible, and it is time to move on. He thinks she will change and lose weight. She thinks he should change and accept it. Thinking someone will change, is probably the biggest killer of relationships.

Everyone has their comfort zone as a Feedist/FA/FFA etc. At least he voiced it to you now at 200 vs waiting for 350+ (when it would be a lot harder to go back if you desire to).
I was strictly Feeder many years back, had ussbbw/ssbbw exes tell me not to get fat because they preferred body contrast/not attracted to fat men. Unrelated issues occurred where it didn't work out. I kept it repressed (didn't pay much attention to it) as someone dear brought it out.
Present Day, I'd rather be solo than to pretend, hide or find other things to fill the void. Hoping you can make the best decision for you, as there will be other forks in the road (regardless of the decisions made), down the line. Best of Luck.

It's the lack of respect as well as how shallow he's being. It's one thing to have a preference. It's quite another to be an asshole. He isn't treating her like a person. He is objectifying her.

This is the same issue as when a feeder gets mad that their feedee is losing weight. Both are bad for the same reason.

just want to say a big thank you to everyone for the kind words and support

Me and my boyfriend have decided to give each other some space to reflect on how wee feel ect. I'm taking it in my stride and aren't going to get myself down about it

We are all rooting for you. I hope you have the best possible outcome.

I don't think this would help in this situation. The problem isn't so much the fetish as it is he isn't respecting her as a person. It would be one thing if he wasn't jiving with the fetish but still treated her the way she should be treated. Alas, this is not the case.

To me it seems like he's in some sort of panic. There is a wide variety of possible causes. If i am to speculate, it can be anything from having a hard time at work, to downright cheating you, thus getting anxious.

I know im a little late to give advice on what to do, but maybe next time you get to talk to him, try to help him be as honest as he can and explain his feelings.

I hope for the best possible outcome to the both of you!

I don't believe it's cheating tbh, deep down I think he's just a little lost when it comes to the relationship and accepting change. I'm the first person he's dated after all. But I do feel he also doesn't know how to handle/accept a partners sexual preferences, and in all fairness to him. Wanting to get fat is something rather strange to people outside the community

Miachu:
I don't believe it's cheating tbh, deep down I think he's just a little lost when it comes to the relationship and accepting change. I'm the first person he's dated after all. But I do feel he also doesn't know how to handle/accept a partners sexual preferences, and in all fairness to him. Wanting to get fat is something rather strange to people outside the community[/quote]

Strange or not you deserve respect, he is entitled to his personal preferences but that doesn't excuse being an ass about your weight. Depending on your height doesn't sound like you've even gained that much yet.

Pure speculation, but societal pressure alone could be causing some feelings of insecurity that he's not sure how to handle. Or won't allow himself to admit, and maybe authentically experience the plus sides to your new curves, causing this hostility.
In the end you need to be true to yourself and what makes you happy, if he is reacting this way now... How will he feel in another 10 20 or even 50 pounds?

Give him some time and space then if he can't have an open honest conversation about his feelings or how you both might reach a compromise... You sadly might need to cut your losses and move on. Best of luck.

here the thing you cant fix these now then drop him your weight will effect you for years or even your whole life.

Dating/gf/bf goal is lead to marriage long term. could you marry someone who dislike your body choices. if cute losses now or it will hurt decades later