Ok, I don't think I've done this one before.
1. Break a couch
Yes, but not solo. Once with a group, once with a bbw friend jokingly sitting on my lap for a picture.
2. Break a bed
Yep, done this one a couple times.
3. Not fit into a car
Once, on a trip with a friend the rental place tried to give us a Smart Fortwo. Neither of us fit into that car.
4. Not fit into a bus seat
Did this back in high school
5. Break the scale
Yep, bent the platform of an analog scale. It wouldn't register over 200 afterwards.
6. Have a triple belly
Nope, no belly folds here.
7. Be able to clap with your thighs
God, been able to do this for a long time.
8. Hide objects in your belly rolls
Not particularly large objects, but I could hide the remote under my belly if you don't mind it getting sweaty.
9. Eat a whole cake
Did this for a bet in college.
10. Squash someone
Yes, but not in a sexual way. More in a "you've obnoxiously decided to lay across the couch when you knew we normally use every seat and I'm all out of fucks" kind of way.
Holy crap, I got 9
3 years