I always had a fascination with larger bodies, as in a admiration and at a young age point of view: it looked comfortable.
I had the idea of being larger felt like being all soft, comfortable with being softer, huggable, heavy of course and it just felt enticing for me.
I regularly found myself doing padding and it felt right in a way being larger, it felt good and I never understood why.
Fast forward to today and I still have not achieved the body I want preferably, due to personal reasons and mental health.
But in grand total, I have gained around 30 kg since I started and these days it is becoming easier to gain weight that sticks around.
Seeing my body change and swell up, it makes me feel happy and it just feels right feeling myself getting progressively heavier, softer and fatter.
I never clearly understand why it feels so good, the way it does. I simply assume that I was born with the desire for it and it came into light more clearly during puberty.
Im in a better place personally, doing the right thing and gain weight for the sake of myself