Munchies:
These are two different things.
I'm talking about liking the actual person. You are talking about liking the body said person inhabits. These two things are very unrelated.
AskDrFeeder:
When I'm interested in a relationship with a woman I want both. The fact that you have a thing for her size does not mean you can't appreciate her on other levels.
Of course it is possible for a man to fetishize a woman for her size and not love her or even like her, and she should reject such a man (unless she just wants a roll in the hay!). But having a preference for curvy women certainly doesn't eliminate the possibility of liking or loving her.
Munchies:
Like I said. These are two completely different things.
I'm in community with a lot of plus-sized women who are not feedists. I've heard horror story after horror story of these women getting into relationships with fat fetishists (either knowingly or unknowingly), only for things to go sideways.
Examples include attempts to manipulate them into the lifestyle, losing their minds if they decide to lose weight, or being more interested in their bodies than anything else.
It wears on a person to be objectified like this. So, instead of continuously taking a chance on fat fetishists, they'll swear them off entirely just to be safe. And considering what I have seen from fat fetishists in the community losing their God damned minds when dating a non-feedist, I get where they are coming from.
This is not to say it can't work out. Sometimes it does.
That said, women who want to be in relationships want to be valued for out personhood first and our body second. It is dangerous for us to be with someone who prizes our bodies too much.
These are two different things.
I'm talking about liking the actual person. You are talking about liking the body said person inhabits. These two things are very unrelated.
AskDrFeeder:
When I'm interested in a relationship with a woman I want both. The fact that you have a thing for her size does not mean you can't appreciate her on other levels.
Of course it is possible for a man to fetishize a woman for her size and not love her or even like her, and she should reject such a man (unless she just wants a roll in the hay!). But having a preference for curvy women certainly doesn't eliminate the possibility of liking or loving her.
Munchies:
Like I said. These are two completely different things.
I'm in community with a lot of plus-sized women who are not feedists. I've heard horror story after horror story of these women getting into relationships with fat fetishists (either knowingly or unknowingly), only for things to go sideways.
Examples include attempts to manipulate them into the lifestyle, losing their minds if they decide to lose weight, or being more interested in their bodies than anything else.
It wears on a person to be objectified like this. So, instead of continuously taking a chance on fat fetishists, they'll swear them off entirely just to be safe. And considering what I have seen from fat fetishists in the community losing their God damned minds when dating a non-feedist, I get where they are coming from.
This is not to say it can't work out. Sometimes it does.
That said, women who want to be in relationships want to be valued for out personhood first and our body second. It is dangerous for us to be with someone who prizes our bodies too much.
Well said!
1 month
