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For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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LoraDayton   United States
Joined 16 years
Refeed:
Round and round we go, where we stop, nobody knows


That's the point actually. To keep discussion moving. To be open to learning new things and understanding where peoples' input comes from. I'm glad you observe the same!
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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Morbidly A Beast   United States
Joined 2 years
It seems to me like no matter where women go men will follow, and men will make women uncomfortable. So unless you had strict moderation or even some sort of mandatory verification/ or even no messaging at all would resolve it… seems to me like it’s a 1 on 1 and less of a public domain issue because people will support the person being harassed
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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HanselsWitch   United States
Joined 6 years
So if it's a question of eliminating men (and women who don't share your ideology), that sounds like more of a smaller group message board. Maybe within a larger kink site. I mean... look at the history of kink. The only reason it's been half-way normalized is because of men's desire for access. Unless it's a site strictly for the female-attracted, keeping men (the lifeblood to kink sites) out is a surefire way for it to fail.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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Munchies   United States
Joined 3 years
HanselsWitch:
So if it's a question of eliminating men (and women who don't share your ideology), that sounds like more of a smaller group message board. Maybe within a larger kink site. I mean... look at the history of kink. The only reason it's been half-way normalized is because of men's desire for access. Unless it's a site strictly for the female-attracted, keeping men (the lifeblood to kink sites) out is a surefire way for it to fail.


Only one user was pro-no men. And everyone clowned on them.

And the thread was all about safe spaces. Across the board the only request was to be treated with respect. So unless you are rascist, xenophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, etc. none of this applies to you.

Also I don't think anyone is looking for things to be normalized in a safe-space. It's nice if it is, but it's not a priority.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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HanselsWitch   United States
Joined 6 years
HanselsWitch:
So if it's a question of eliminating men (and women who don't share your ideology), that sounds like more of a smaller group message board. Maybe within a larger kink site. I mean... look at the history of kink. The only reason it's been half-way normalized is because of men's desire for access. Unless it's a site strictly for the female-attracted, keeping men (the lifeblood to kink sites) out is a surefire way for it to fail.

Munchies:
Only one user was pro-no men. And everyone clowned on them.

And the thread was all about safe spaces. Across the board the only request was to be treated with respect. So unless you are rascist, xenophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, etc. none of this applies to you.

Also I don't think anyone is looking for things to be normalized in a safe-space. It's nice if it is, but it's not a priority.


What I meant by "normalized" was that forums like FF exist at all. Without men, those spaces die. I doubt most men would last in a space where they'll be ousted at the slightest whiff of "problematic" behavior.

I suppose people could dream all day about a place where their ideas are never challenged and nobody says anything that offends them, but it simply will never exist in the real world.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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Munchies   United States
Joined 3 years
HanselsWitch:
So if it's a question of eliminating men (and women who don't share your ideology), that sounds like more of a smaller group message board. Maybe within a larger kink site. I mean... look at the history of kink. The only reason it's been half-way normalized is because of men's desire for access. Unless it's a site strictly for the female-attracted, keeping men (the lifeblood to kink sites) out is a surefire way for it to fail.

Munchies:
Only one user was pro-no men. And everyone clowned on them.

And the thread was all about safe spaces. Across the board the only request was to be treated with respect. So unless you are rascist, xenophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, etc. none of this applies to you.

Also I don't think anyone is looking for things to be normalized in a safe-space. It's nice if it is, but it's not a priority.

HanselsWitch:
What I meant by "normalized" was that forums like FF exist at all. Without men, those spaces die. I doubt most men would last in a space where they'll be ousted at the slightest whiff of "problematic" behavior.

I suppose people could dream all day about a place where their ideas are never challenged and nobody says anything that offends them, but it simply will never exist in the real world.


You should give men more credit. Most men are decent people. Most men are not going to sexually harrass people or be openly bigotted. It is the percentage of men that *WILL* do that is why there's a problem.

It becomes an even bigger problem when there is a culture of bigotry. So, that's what people are talking about. It's a little sad that you have such a low view of people in general - especially men.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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HanselsWitch   United States
Joined 6 years
HanselsWitch:
So if it's a question of eliminating men (and women who don't share your ideology), that sounds like more of a smaller group message board. Maybe within a larger kink site. I mean... look at the history of kink. The only reason it's been half-way normalized is because of men's desire for access. Unless it's a site strictly for the female-attracted, keeping men (the lifeblood to kink sites) out is a surefire way for it to fail.

Munchies:
Only one user was pro-no men. And everyone clowned on them.

And the thread was all about safe spaces. Across the board the only request was to be treated with respect. So unless you are rascist, xenophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, etc. none of this applies to you.

Also I don't think anyone is looking for things to be normalized in a safe-space. It's nice if it is, but it's not a priority.

HanselsWitch:
What I meant by "normalized" was that forums like FF exist at all. Without men, those spaces die. I doubt most men would last in a space where they'll be ousted at the slightest whiff of "problematic" behavior.

I suppose people could dream all day about a place where their ideas are never challenged and nobody says anything that offends them, but it simply will never exist in the real world.

Munchies:
You should give men more credit. Most men are decent people. Most men are not going to sexually harrass people or be openly bigotted. It is the percentage of men that *WILL* do that is why there's a problem.

It becomes an even bigger problem when there is a culture of bigotry. So, that's what people are talking about. It's a little sad that you have such a low view of people in general - especially men.


Do we know each other? What exactly tells you I have a low view of men? I was simply stating that most men wouldn't want to deal with environment where they're walking on eggshells... which is more often than not the culture of "safe spaces." Not because most men are bad, but because they don't want anything they say blown out of proportion or becoming a pile-on in the comments. Most women wouldn't want that either, but they're usually judged less harshly.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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Munchies   United States
Joined 3 years
HanselsWitch:
Do we know each other? What exactly tells you I have a low view of men? I was simply stating that most men wouldn't want to deal with environment where they're walking on eggshells... which is more often than not the culture of "safe spaces." Not because most men are bad, but because they don't want anything they say blown out of proportion or becoming a pile-on in the comments. Most women wouldn't want that either, but they're usually judged less harshly.


Read again, love. This entire thread is about what an idealized safe space would look like. Not about the merits of having a safe space or the pitfalls there-in.

Fantasy Feeder is a safe space for feedists. Regardless of how you feel about it, it is first and foremost a safe space. I don't see men leaving in droves because they feel like they are walking on eggshells.

If anything, there other genders on here that feel like they are in hostile territory because of certain behaviors are being left unchecked.

I am very aware you can overcorrect and become an insular, regressive group. But again, that is not the point of the thread at all. In fact, the majority of people on here are just asking for basic level protections. So I find it curious that you think this would inconvience the average man.

I also find it curious about you saying that women who's views are not in line with the majority of the group. The women would not be wanted in this safe would be racists, homophobes, transphobes, xenophobes, etc. You know, the kind of people who seek to exclude the very people who want this safe space.
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

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LoraDayton   United States
Joined 16 years

AnonLovesBlubber:
Chill lady, its just a username. I never said I see you as just blubber.


My name is Lora. It's literally right in front of you. And you are the one who wandered into a thread meant for others to just complain because it didn't apply to you. And then proceeded to do exactly the things we're talking about.

There. Is that the attention you wanted? The irony of choosing to not even use my name while insisting you see us as people while ALSO trying to assert some power that you don't actually have isn't interesting, it's predictable.

TKDR nobody asked you
2 years

For women, femme, and non-binary/gnc friends: what would a safe fa space look like to you?

Avatar
HanselsWitch   United States
Joined 6 years
HanselsWitch:
Do we know each other? What exactly tells you I have a low view of men? I was simply stating that most men wouldn't want to deal with environment where they're walking on eggshells... which is more often than not the culture of "safe spaces." Not because most men are bad, but because they don't want anything they say blown out of proportion or becoming a pile-on in the comments. Most women wouldn't want that either, but they're usually judged less harshly.

Munchies:
Read again, love. This entire thread is about what an idealized safe space would look like. Not about the merits of having a safe space or the pitfalls there-in.

Fantasy Feeder is a safe space for feedists. Regardless of how you feel about it, it is first and foremost a safe space. I don't see men leaving in droves because they feel like they are walking on eggshells.

If anything, there other genders on here that feel like they are in hostile territory because of certain behaviors are being left unchecked.

I am very aware you can overcorrect and become an insular, regressive group. But again, that is not the point of the thread at all. In fact, the majority of people on here are just asking for basic level protections. So I find it curious that you think this would inconvience the average man.

I also find it curious about you saying that women who's views are not in line with the majority of the group. The women would not be wanted in this safe would be racists, homophobes, transphobes, xenophobes, etc. You know, the kind of people who seek to exclude the very people who want this safe space.


Are you hinting that I must belong in the "undesirables" category because I'm challenging the feasibility of a completely "safe space?" This is exactly the behavior I'm referring to when I say most people wouldn't want to deal with being scrutinized.

Of course hate speech should never be tolerated. If that's the only thing you're trying to eliminate, it doesn't seem to be much of a problem on here (then again I don't comb every forum looking for it). So if FF is already a safe space as you say, what's the point of this discussion?

Also, who's seeking to exclude people based on race or gender? Has that happened on FF, or are we just trying to solve an imaginary problem?
2 years
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