Gaining

As is said, and will be said time and again, its up to you and how you honestly feel about it.

You need to put all other factors out of your mind and focus on what will be the best overall for you and then pursue it.

Though personally, i have to say you seem to be in a situation many a gainer would kill for, body which gains easy, partner who loves you big (and/or bigger) Along with clearly a less hectic lifeif you give up the gym.

But yeah, sometimes there is more to life then a fetish, so try and work out what is right for you.

My suggestion, since you say you aren't a feedee, and your wife has not openly asked you to gain.....decide on the lifestyle you are comfortable with, and let your body then do what it wants. Because from what you said, it is not that biddable in the first place. So decide that perhaps you'll go to the gym for forty-five minutes, three times a week, or else that you'll get a small weight bench in the basement, or whatever, and will make sure that you keep taking walks, using the stairs, and generally staying active. And at the same time that you will eat in a reasonably, healthy, manner, with sane amounts of indulgences on top of the healthy stuff. And talk it over with your wife....then let what will be, be.

I do think that trying to control weight directly tends to be a bit of a fools game....choose the life/lifestyle you want, accept the weight that comes with it. (yes, even as an FA with feeder/feedee desires I say this)

I've had a similar experience in the last year. I gained 30 pounds from 2006 to 2007. The gain was from quitting the gym and skipping my usual summer slim-down. That is when I would cut out all beer during the week. Just one year ago I got back to the gym . I lost 15 pounds down to 200 in just 3 months. And 9 months later-here I am. 199.I just cut the beer out again but I'm having an awful time getting rid of my gut. I added a lot of fat cells -all in the belly and they are fighting for dear life. You might be experiencing the same thing.
I've got a couple more ideas. Make sure you're not staying there too long-I get good results from 45 minutes. I do cardio for 20-25 and then close the gym at 10:00 ifting weights. My weight sessions are pretty intense for my age. I think if I did cardio for 2 hours I wouldn't get the same results. Just some food for thought. If you hated being 230 -you should probably not go back. But if your lady likes it alot-hmmm. I see where the idea has some appeal to you.

I agree with Eagledancer about letting the wife in on it. And since you mentioned you'd love to see her with a filled-out belly-like 230. Why don't you see if she'd like to over-indulge with you! I love reading the adventures of couples who gain together.

Heh, I'd read your previous post, and was going to write something about how a suddent surge of junk food might not be good....but I was too late!

By the way, you can condition yourself...at one point I went from having trouble with more than two donuts to being able to down half a dozen and wish that there was more, but it took a while to build up the sugar and fat tolerance. But I'm not really recommending it, unless (like it was for me), it is something you want to do just for the fantasy/thrill of it.

I also want to note that it sounds like you are going a bit from one extreme to another, from desperately trying to keep your body as toned as you could, to really pushing to make it a lot fatter. I don't know what is going on in your head, but I'd just ask why the big flip from trying to control it in one direction to trying to control it in the other?

One more note, changes may seem to come slowly for a while, but as your muscles lose tone you will then begin to look/feel fatter quite quickly I suspect. So be patient for the first month or three!

Take care;

-Ed