General

Self-concious women

Ok. This is the story. This beautful BBW redhead and I have been flirting at work for awhile. Today, I come up behind her and gently put my hands across her midsection. She says "Don't touch my stomach!". Keep in mind, she flashed me her huge, lovely breasts just the other day. It seemed a bit odd to me. It was a flirtatious act to touch her stomach, but she seemed to be self concious of it. If I had no interest in big ladies, then why would I flirt with her in the first place? It's disheartening and dare I say a turn off when someone is that uptight about something, at least in my view.

Thoughts?
13 years

Self-concious women

Mk29 wrote
Most people don't know what they want and act accordingly... important to recognize this so that you don't put yourself in a situation like you did. Obviously she gave you mixed signals but if you are dealing with a child then expect the same reaction everytime. Adults can communicate how they feel and I recommend asking her why what you did bothered her so that you can open her up to the reason why she feels the way she does. Sorry you had to take the brunt of her emotional insecurities but everyone is dealing with something.

Best of luck!


Well, she isn't a child in age, but maybe mentally. She's 19, and I'm 30. In fact, I told her I like her curves and softness, and she replied "Your odd", yet still continued to flirt with me. But, it was kind of a buzzkill for me, you know? I'm thinking 'If she's insecure about something insignificant, what else lies ahead?" That being said, it may not be insignificant to her. But, do I really wan't to deal with that?
13 years

Self-concious women

WindDancer wrote
Maybe her stomach is really sensitive, and it hurts when people touch it... smiley Or, maybe she just wants to be in control of the situation like when she showed you her breasts, that was her decision and when you put your hands on her it might have made her uncomfortable...


This, well somewhat lol.

I find that for some larger women, the stomach can be a very sensitive area and i don't mean in that "ooh that tickles way"

For her, she may be more uncomfortable with her stomach then her boobs, hence the reason she flashed you.

Also, and this is more for everyone, i'd stay away from the stomach as a starting point unless you know the other person is into the scene or comfortable with it, for general society, the stomach still seems to be a "taboo" area.

Hopefully though you can work past this, probably apologise, and still continue with where the relationship was heading. smiley
13 years

Self-concious women

Maximum wrote
WindDancer wrote
Maybe her stomach is really sensitive, and it hurts when people touch it... smiley Or, maybe she just wants to be in control of the situation like when she showed you her breasts, that was her decision and when you put your hands on her it might have made her uncomfortable...


This, well somewhat lol.

I find that for some larger women, the stomach can be a very sensitive area and i don't mean in that "ooh that tickles way"

For her, she may be more uncomfortable with her stomach then her boobs, hence the reason she flashed you.

Also, and this is more for everyone, i'd stay away from the stomach as a starting point unless you know the other person is into the scene or comfortable with it, for general society, the stomach still seems to be a "taboo" area.

Hopefully though you can work past this, probably apologise, and still continue with where the relationship was heading. smiley


"Hopefully though you can work past this, probably apologise, and still continue with where the relationship was heading."

I don't feel the need to apologize, I did nothing wrong. I've put my arms around the stomach of slimmer women, and they didn't freak out like this girl did. Seems she has a belly issue. The midsection is naturally where your hands go when you hug someone from behind. I was meaning no offense, but she was sensitive about the issue. Go figure. I suppose we all have our quirks.
13 years

Self-concious women

nl54 wrote
I don't feel the need to apologize, I did nothing wrong. I've put my arms around the stomach of slimmer women, and they didn't freak out like this girl did.


Well if a slimmer women reacted like that would you have apologised?

Everyone is different and is comfortable with different things, I just think if I did something to someone and they did not appreciate it, i'd feel the need to apologize for my forwardness.

However, like I said, everyone is different.
13 years

Self-concious women

Chubbylovely wrote
There is nothing wrong with the girl, I say the same thing ANY time my belly is touched.....
Shes been raised in a society where fat is disgusting, wrong, unattractive etc and she is not going to be automatically comfortable with someone touching her belly because " They like curves".
She may not even know feederism or FA's exist! I only came across this site a few months ago and didnt know any of this existed either. I will still continue to be self concious of my fat and it being touched and if Im ever lucky enough to meet an FA I will not automatically be comfortable and ok with them touching my belly and other various fat areas. It probably wont take long for me to get comfortable if I know he is specifically an FA, but I will continue to be self concious if I dont know those facts.
There is no way you can blame the girl for reacting like that, I would of said the same thing, but in a giggly kinda way to hide my embarrassment.


I agree, and I can understand the self consciousness to some degree. It's just frustrating finding a BBW in every day life that is comfortable with her body.
13 years

Self-concious women

Chubbylovely wrote
Unfortunately thats the case with our society smiley

I do think though if you become closer to her and explain exactly how much you like her body and continue to show her that, she will open up.
Coming across this site has done wonders for my body confidence in knowing there are FA's out there. Until I actually meet one and I KNOW hes an FA, I will continue to be self concious when it comes to touch. Truth be told it does disgust a huge majority of men, so many of us girls cant help but react that way...

I think if you get closer and introduce her to the site she will understand you a lot better. If I meet an FA I wont immediately be comfortable with my body but Im sure I will get pretty used to being comfy real quick when I see how much I turn him on, lol.

Just dont write her off, it takes time and once shes informed I think things may turn out really well for you! smiley

( P.S, sorry my posts were a little heated, just hit a nerve, I could see exactly where she was coming from. haha )


It's all good. All opinions are valued, and let's face it, it's the internet smiley
13 years

Self-concious women

RubyRipples wrote
Chubbylovely wrote
There is nothing wrong with the girl, I say the same thing ANY time my belly is touched.....
Shes been raised in a society where fat is disgusting, wrong, unattractive etc and she is not going to be automatically comfortable with someone touching her belly because " They like curves".
She may not even know feederism or FA's exist! I only came across this site a few months ago and didnt know any of this existed either. I will still continue to be self concious of my fat and it being touched and if Im ever lucky enough to meet an FA I will not automatically be comfortable and ok with them touching my belly and other various fat areas. It probably wont take long for me to get comfortable if I know he is specifically an FA, but I will continue to be self concious if I dont know those facts.
There is no way you can blame the girl for reacting like that, I would of said the same thing, but in a giggly kinda way to hide my embarrassment.


THIS

Breasts are seen as "sexy", fat stomachs are not. Also, you crossed a biiig line putting your hands on her body anywhere other than say her shoulder. There are boundaries in a work environmeht. The fact that slimmer women did not react in the same way as this girl, does not mean this girl is "uptight" as you put it. I'd have shoved you away too, whatever size I was. You don't invade a person's space like that unless you've been told that you can. If I had witnessed the incident, I'd have actually seen you as the one with the issue, not her.

She IS only a teenager too, flirty or not.


"Also, you crossed the line bigtime putting your hand anywhere except her shoulder." So it's perfectly fine for her to come by and smack me on the ass in a work enviroment? She did that several times, and it didn't make me come unglued, I enjoyed it. She just has a belly issue, apparently. And yes, behavior like that is against corporate rules, but it happens all the time.
13 years

Self-concious women

If I had no interest in big ladies, then why would I flirt with her in the first place?

People flirt all the time with people they are not physically interested in, I think it's just called fun.


It's disheartening and dare I say a turn off when someone is that uptight about something, at least in my view.

Turn off? Since you are 29 and a Fa, I think you should come to the realization that a young 19 year old girl and I stress young girl, probably is not going to be comfortable with her belly being touched unless prior approved by some guy she works with. Not everyone knows about this site and the other fat positive sites out there. I have just come to terms with my belly in last couple years and although I never had a problem with being fat, I always hated my belly and fantasized about cutting it off with a knife myself, so you see, I have come a long way. Why don't you, in a very gentle way, let this girl know about sites like this and that you frequent them looking for just her type.
13 years

Self-concious women

Bellyastic wrote
If I had no interest in big ladies, then why would I flirt with her in the first place?

People flirt all the time with people they are not physically interested in, I think it's just called fun.


It's disheartening and dare I say a turn off when someone is that uptight about something, at least in my view.

Turn off? Since you are 29 and a Fa, I think you should come to the realization that a young 19 year old girl and I stress young girl, probably is not going to be comfortable with her belly being touched unless prior approved by some guy she works with. Not everyone knows about this site and the other fat positive sites out there. I have just come to terms with my belly in last couple years and although I never had a problem with being fat, I always hated my belly and fantasized about cutting it off with a knife myself, so you see, I have come a long way. Why don't you, in a very gentle way, let this girl know about sites like this and that you frequent them looking for just her type.


It's all good now. It just got under my skin at the time, and I had to blow off some steam smiley
13 years
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