Right now I'm at the breaking point of loneliness, looking for some good friend at the moment, I mean I'm at that point where I feel so alone cause I don't think anyone would ever want me. I'm done with the bull crap of oh you'll find your one your still young, I really don't care about how young I am or how immature I seem I'm just tired of this feeling I want it to go away so badly. every night I crawl inside a bottle to make this feeling of sorrow go away even if its just for a little while, I feel at peace when I have vodka in my hand. I'm sorry to put this on everyone but I really needed some one to talk to any who would know what its like better than the people who like guys and girls big like I do. Family was out of the question and well I can't really see a therapist with no money. I'm at that point where you drink to just to keep your self sane cause you know how much women despise you, I'm an ugly sack of shit and like any woman would want to be my feedee my whole I will never find that piece, this isn't just me trying to get attention or anything like that this is more or me spilling my guts out so I can help myself with my problem and hoping some kind folk would help me through this cause I'm just sick of being alone is what it boils down to I wake up alone and fall to sleep alone. I need another half I never had a girl friend and I'm 19 its making me sick yet I don't know what to do since all I do is try and get shot down or not even a reply, I make a dating add make a dating forum and I get nothing, sometime I feel like my only release from this loneliness is if I do something drastic this is not a joke I'm really at my breaking point and I have no one to talk to with. sorry for the errors, I'm not good at grammar.
12 years