Gaining

Notorious: I have gained un-intentionally this past fall. Not a huge amount, but three to seven pounds, adding an inch to my waist. I am in the military reserves and I have to stay in good shape, so it has been a real dycotomy for me. I love the extra inch on my belly, but I have to get rid of it. I also was diagnosed with hypo-thyroid and I am now on thyroid medication, which I thought would make weight control alot easier, the opposite has been true. Ned Fox

You're just conflicted. That's very common. Your desire to be bigger is in opposition to what society says you should be.

Sometimes people love this more and more as they gain more and more and become less conflicted about it. I can't guarantee that'll happen to you but it's certainly possible.