forum  lifestyle tips

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Thanks for reading, I am currently in a relationship with a feedee and I am wanting to be a feeder but it is something I have never actually done before. Only before has it always been "fantasy" and now that it is reality I am getting cold feet and don't know how to be dominant or feeder-y. Any tips ?

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Your best bet for improving things is going to be to talk to your feedee, find out what he likes, what turns him on, and of course what makes him hungry.

It doesn't necessarily have to be about being dominant; a feeder can be submissive too, quietly working to make sure their lover's food needs are met.

Most importantly, limits and goals are the most important part. Who wants the fattening more, you or him? Does he want to eat until he can't breathe or just be full often? Are there goals in mind that are long-term or short-term?

Like anything else in a relationship, of course, communication comes first. That'll show you how best to feed your man. smiley

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Just keep communicating. My own feeder gf knows I like being force fed and dommed, but she still hasn't really worked out my stomach capacity, so she holds back. The important thing is to listen to feedback.

The basic truth is, if I trust somebody enough to let them cuff my wrists and ankles to a bed, I trust them enough to let them feed me absolutely whatever they decide to- at that point, I've effectively waived my choice in the matter. We do have a safeword, but I haven't had to use it yet. Maybe when she gets into her groove.

Also, absolutely have a big, weird, open talk about both of your kinks and fantasies. You're already engaging in one of the most taboo, body-altering fetishes by fattening him up like this, so don't hold back. You'll learn easy ways to enhance the experience. Like, I get off on the kind of loss of control aspects of feedism, so I like stuff like having a piece of oversized clothing that I'm absolutely required to grow into. Maybe your feedee has something similar.

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Really interested to learn what He wants and why You do.

A bit of backstory might help here-- when did you find out about each other's commonly considered 'bizarre' interest; is he in fact a foodee who'd like you to participate or is it more like you're an aspiring feeder coming out of the closet and him agreeing with your idea?

As someone else pointed out, domination/submission is not required and who takes on which role isn't fixed either.

Gonna throw in an unpopular opinion on these boards but I believe it's perfectly okay (and quite arousing) to [a] do it without consent and/or [b] do it in secrecy, tricking your partner.

The take away is that there's many ways to get there and we can't really say anything about your particular situation unless you add some sauce ;-)

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Gonna throw in an unpopular opinion on these boards but I believe it's perfectly okay (and quite arousing) to [a] do it without consent and/or [b] do it in secrecy, tricking your partner.

I wanna elaborate on this topic a little. If you've read my posting history, you know I'm *all about* nonconsensual fattening, as a feedee. I think you should still get clearance before embarking on that path, though. If your feedee tells you that he wants you to use any means to fatten him up, even if he tries to resist, then consider that the green light. If you haven't had the "what's the heaviest you could possibly want to become" conversation, then it's a good place to work this in.

My feeder knows that I'm a whiner who gets worried easily and thinks too fast/detailed for my own good, but she also knows about my darkest fantasies and mostly shares them. She has basically carte blanche to fatten me up however she wants, even if I protest. Hell, that would probably turn her on more.

What I'm trying to say is, I think it's a little important to be able to, when your guy is getting worried about stairs and walking moderate distances, move in close and remind him, "This is what you wanted."

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Pretty much this. At some point the roles in our relationship took a dramatic reversal, as my used-to-be feeder decreed I had become too much of a good thing. At which point I, the was-supposed-to-be-his-submissive-piglet, took charge and ordered him to feed his goddamn wife like he'd said he would.

There had been consent at some point, however. It may not be necessary, but it's always safer to have an agreement beforehand just in case someone changes their mind. It's okay to get married, get fat and not give a hoot about your significant other's opinion on the matter; but when he explicitly endorses this early on you can throw it right back at him when he starts complaining you've done too good a job.

Non-consent is high-risk, high-reward; whereas when you both agree you always have a trump card.

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

If your feedee still suffers of some range of internalized Fatphobism, never EVER speak about her increasing weight or body changes unless this is actually something she want to heard from you.

Display your vivacious intrest to her progress but never be a pushover nor soft neither.

Respect her, love her. Learn how to empower her self-confidence overtime because she can past through a pandemonium of somewhat countradictory emotions, experiences and informations as she's getting fat.

Keep a lookout to her progress, show off how this detail about her bring your interest. Women loves when a man is geniunely drawn to her (but don't be a pushover!!) .

Well, be a partner to her. Simple.

how do i become a good feeder?7 months

Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply.

A little more backstory, my feedee and I actually met on this website about 3 years ago. We have been living together for two and a half years but life has been hectic and both of our desires have been pushed to the back burner. I am a bigger girl and always have been, but I am not gaining weight for many reasons. He wants to gain, and has gained about 70 lbs since we have been together just by proxy, bad eating habits and a lazier work schedule. (Yay, southern cooking!)

Now that we are finally trying to get our feet back on the ground and get things in order, we are hoping to get back into the feeder/feedee routine. I used to make him weight gain shakes but it was hard to keep that up.

We also have a funnel that attaches to the head with a strap but we have never used it because I have been too shy and the time has never been "right".

Thank you for all the tips. We are working on it and since this post, I have fed him once a box of Swiss rolls and forced him to drink half a gallon of milk, so that's something smiley

how do i become a good feeder?6 months

Try starting out small...

Order his dinner when you go out to eat, doesn't have to be a big meal.

Bring home a bunch of foods you can feed him by hand - strawberries, grapes, cherries, bite sized cookies, sliders, shrimp, tater tots etc. You don't have to stuff him, just enjoy the closeness.

Buy him a size up shirt and pants or belt. You don't even have to say anything. Just put it on his dresser.

Fix both of you some dessert, but make his portion much larger.

You don't have to be dominant to be a feeder.