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when to tell a date you're a feedist?4 months

So I've started telling dates before I even meet them that I'm a gainer. Because I found out that two dates in was "too late to wait for that info."

I saw one girl, a non-feedist, for two dates over the span of less than a week. Thought I'd tell her before date three. She flipped out at me. The rationale for her reaction? Apparently you're supposed to tell a date your fetishes and darkest desires before the first date, according to her.

My thinking though, is that's not exactly casual, get to know each other conversation.

"So, do you have pets? Where do you work? What crazy shit makes you orgasm? Do you have siblings?"

Doesn't quite seem right to me.

Either way, I'm interested in hearing opinions. When do y'all tell non-feedist dates that you're a feedist?

when to tell a date you're a feedist?4 months

While gaining is indeed a sexual fetish for a lot of people itís also a huge deal. Itís life altering, body altering, itís expensive. I know itís awkward bringing up fetishes that you have with potential dates or on a date but you have to remember that not everyone has a fetish, and when that fetish is such a big deal to you that you base your life around it then itís important to let the other person know ASAP. Iím more into getting to know someone on a personal level before going out on dates and thatís one reason why, I also absolutely hate wasting my time so if I wasnít into it and I already went out several times with someone Iíd be upset too. I probably wouldnít mention it though, I would just not talk to that person again or vaguely say Iím not interested depending on how ďweirdĒ the fetish was. For a lot of women going out on a date is an all day preparation to make yourself look pretty, lots of time and effort spent picking out the best outfit, maybe spending hours or days daydreaming about it and talking to their girlfriends or family about it. So to get all excited then come home and embarrassingly say ďnever mind, he was a creepĒ could be pretty crushing. I donít think youíre a creep by the way, Iím just using that as an example of how girls talk. Also when I think about it, if I went out with a guy and he told me that he had a vore swallowing live mice fetish or something Iím super against like that then I would indeed go the *** on him. So maybe she really doesnít like fat stuff. I didnít actually look at your pics but being a feedee I assume youíre already fat, and she would have known youíre fat and seem ok with it if she went out with you, so my guess is that itís a fetish thing and she finds that to be the bad part about it. But thatís just my guess and opinions on that. 😊 (Longest reply ever!)

when to tell a date you're a feedist?4 months

Longest reply, and greatest reply smiley

Definitely agree with a lot of what you said, which is why I'd already added a note about being a gainer to my vanilla dating site profiles.

Wasting time is a huge factor, for both me and the person who's time I'm taking. So brining it up early was definitely on the agenda, hence why with that girl I'd brought it up within the first week of talking to her.

But her reaction (a really mean one, tbh), was just a shock. I totally get this fetish isn't for everyone. It's just annoying when people are either closed minded or heavily judgemental, but such is life.

when to tell a date you're a feedist?4 months

It's not necessarily feedism I need, but at the very least someone who is ok with a fat - and gaining - partner.

While it is kinda silly in one way to have to put it out there right off the bat, it also does screen out the people that otherwise wouldn't be into me.

It's a little bit of private info to give out in order to find someone who's ok with my lifestyle.