i thought i would share my story of the last year here. i don't have any friends in my rl aside from my girlfriend, di, but i know others here have had similar experiences...
about a year ago i met di, my current girlfriend, a ssbbw. at the time i was a very fit, athletically-built guy. we hit it off immediately, really connected well,and several months later she moved in with me.
in all my past relationships, i have been pretty much the dominant feeder. i liked staying in shape to highlight that contrast with my feedee, whether an man or a woman (i am bisexual, or pansexual). di was already very large when i met her, and had no familiarity with the feedist scene. when i introduced her to the concept, she didn't find it very interesting. that was ok, we had lots of other things and kinks in common (bondage, etc.).
dating has never been a more fun and positive experience, i think. we spent as much time together as we could, juggling our schedules. most of our time together involved going out to restaurants and bars, eating out (di is very much a foodie), or hanging out at home, watching movies, and of course, more eating and drinking.
i started to make less and less time for the gym, opting to stay in with di... snacking, drinking. playing! eventually i noticed my pants getting tighter, and made an effort to work out more. when i would get dressed to go, she would often tempt me to stay with her abundant charms... she denies trying to sabotage my efforts, but i am not so sure, lol!
weeks away from the gym turned into months away. my clothes were no longer fitting properly, so i got larger sizes. i tried to work out again, with the plan of shrinking back down into my smaller sizes again. but it was getting harder and harder to stick with it, and just easier to hang out on the couch and snack!
eventually it got to the point that my gut was impossible to hide. my family teased me, my co-workers mocked me, and even di started to call me names. she clearly liked the bigger me, though. and to be honest, i started to like the teasing.
when i passed 200 lbs (50 lbs heavier than my first pic here on ff!!!) it was a shock to me. it caused me to reflect on where i was now... i had a bulging tummy that bounced and jiggled with my movements. sitting up in bed was noticeably more difficult.
i felt like i was on a precipice - i went to the gym to do something about it. i was so embarrassed to see my reflection in the mirrors - an unavoidable belly poking out. my cardio had deteriorated significantly, i just died on the treadmill, and my strength had diminished to an embarrassing degree. i used to actively weight train, but all of those muscles seemed to have vanished.
i felt disheartened, and to be honest, a little humiliated in that last attempt at working out. when i talked to di about it, she lavished attention on my flabby parts, and surprised me - she didn't want me to lose the weight. she wanted me to put on another 50 lbs, instead!
i felt mixed emotions at that. i loved her support and affection, and tbh, the idea that she was coming around to some of the ideals of a feedist was kind of enticing! but i already felt like i had turned from a stallion into a pig, i wasn't crazy about getting even fatter.
...but then... i did get fatter! in the weeks since that conversation, i have put on another 20 lbs. she delights in tempting and teasing me, and she is so gorgeous, really, she is hard to resist! she is also taking on a far more dominant role in our sex life, which has been fun. my ego is getting less sensitive to her name calling, and her teasing me, and showing that she can easily dominate the fatter, weaker me, having her way with me.
at the moment, heading into the holidays, i don't know where this is going to lead. i am definitely enjoying myself in the moment, but in at other times i sometimes find myself reflecting on my new, bloated, sqeezable body, still dumbfounded by how this has happened to me? di has told me that she is calling the shots over the holidays, and i am ok with that, and look forward to time off work with her, doing (and eating) as she pleases!
i suggested to her that i could start working out in the new year, try to trim down. she smiled a sneaky smile and said, "you can try... but what makes you think you won't have passed the point of no return by then?"
what have i gotten myself into?
about a year ago i met di, my current girlfriend, a ssbbw. at the time i was a very fit, athletically-built guy. we hit it off immediately, really connected well,and several months later she moved in with me.
in all my past relationships, i have been pretty much the dominant feeder. i liked staying in shape to highlight that contrast with my feedee, whether an man or a woman (i am bisexual, or pansexual). di was already very large when i met her, and had no familiarity with the feedist scene. when i introduced her to the concept, she didn't find it very interesting. that was ok, we had lots of other things and kinks in common (bondage, etc.).
dating has never been a more fun and positive experience, i think. we spent as much time together as we could, juggling our schedules. most of our time together involved going out to restaurants and bars, eating out (di is very much a foodie), or hanging out at home, watching movies, and of course, more eating and drinking.
i started to make less and less time for the gym, opting to stay in with di... snacking, drinking. playing! eventually i noticed my pants getting tighter, and made an effort to work out more. when i would get dressed to go, she would often tempt me to stay with her abundant charms... she denies trying to sabotage my efforts, but i am not so sure, lol!
weeks away from the gym turned into months away. my clothes were no longer fitting properly, so i got larger sizes. i tried to work out again, with the plan of shrinking back down into my smaller sizes again. but it was getting harder and harder to stick with it, and just easier to hang out on the couch and snack!
eventually it got to the point that my gut was impossible to hide. my family teased me, my co-workers mocked me, and even di started to call me names. she clearly liked the bigger me, though. and to be honest, i started to like the teasing.
when i passed 200 lbs (50 lbs heavier than my first pic here on ff!!!) it was a shock to me. it caused me to reflect on where i was now... i had a bulging tummy that bounced and jiggled with my movements. sitting up in bed was noticeably more difficult.
i felt like i was on a precipice - i went to the gym to do something about it. i was so embarrassed to see my reflection in the mirrors - an unavoidable belly poking out. my cardio had deteriorated significantly, i just died on the treadmill, and my strength had diminished to an embarrassing degree. i used to actively weight train, but all of those muscles seemed to have vanished.
i felt disheartened, and to be honest, a little humiliated in that last attempt at working out. when i talked to di about it, she lavished attention on my flabby parts, and surprised me - she didn't want me to lose the weight. she wanted me to put on another 50 lbs, instead!
i felt mixed emotions at that. i loved her support and affection, and tbh, the idea that she was coming around to some of the ideals of a feedist was kind of enticing! but i already felt like i had turned from a stallion into a pig, i wasn't crazy about getting even fatter.
...but then... i did get fatter! in the weeks since that conversation, i have put on another 20 lbs. she delights in tempting and teasing me, and she is so gorgeous, really, she is hard to resist! she is also taking on a far more dominant role in our sex life, which has been fun. my ego is getting less sensitive to her name calling, and her teasing me, and showing that she can easily dominate the fatter, weaker me, having her way with me.
at the moment, heading into the holidays, i don't know where this is going to lead. i am definitely enjoying myself in the moment, but in at other times i sometimes find myself reflecting on my new, bloated, sqeezable body, still dumbfounded by how this has happened to me? di has told me that she is calling the shots over the holidays, and i am ok with that, and look forward to time off work with her, doing (and eating) as she pleases!
i suggested to her that i could start working out in the new year, try to trim down. she smiled a sneaky smile and said, "you can try... but what makes you think you won't have passed the point of no return by then?"
what have i gotten myself into?
4 years