General

Just planning ahead... but what legal docs should be signed feeder/feedee before I’m unable to do so? I would want to give the feeder control.

Scary things to think about, but better and easier for everyone if it is done before hand.

As a former lawyer, I'd agree with the POA comment. Regarding that, I would make it someone you trust to make the best decisions for you and your health ... not your Feeder as their intentions might very well disregard what is ultimately in your best interest.

I would also suggest supplementing the medical decisions portion of that with an advanced directive that makes it clear what your wishes are in the event that you become medically incapacitated and decisions have to be made regarding things like feeding tubes and life support.

While those two things would protect you, a will would also be a good idea if you have serious debt or assets that would need to be handled should something happen to you.

All those things said ... I would seriously recommend thinking through how far you want to push your gaining. POA's, advanced directives, and wills are scary things to think about yes, .. and while good to have in place for anyone in any situation .. you are talking about engaging in behavior that would intentionally and unnecessarily cause them to be triggered. That's not a decision that should be taken lightly.

You may consider a separate health care proxy and POA, depending on your situation. The proxy itself gives control over medical decisions only, not finances. Personally, I want those separate so decisions are not influenced one way or the other.