Lifestyle tips

My husband died ten months ago. I miss him so much… and I’m starting to accept things… but I really miss intimacy and being touched too. I don’t *ever* want to date again:.. but casual sex… it’s awful. I can’t cum without feederism being involved but I also don’t feel like explaining it to some random person I never plan on seeing again. They’ll just get it wrong or be bad at it or something. How do I go about this? I literally get nothing out of regular sex. Now I’m just like a touch starved hermit.

There are definitely levels between purely casual sex and serious dating. "Friends with benefits" is a phrase that gets used reductively to mean "non-boyfriend you are nonetheless fucking" but if they actually are a friend you can get to know each other over time and do it regularly. It can certainly be a little fraught to keep things stable with neither person tipping into wanting more emotionally, but it's possible if you're both mature, open and communicative.

Finding someone who's suitable for this sort of thing, especially with an unusual kink, can take a while and get frustrating, but I think searching here or other fetish-oriented sites is a good start.

Condolences for your loss *hugs* Stick around here and there’s plenty of encouragement to be found :-)

There are a lot of people out there seeking simply casual or feedist-only engagements. However be smart about it: if it becomes a regular thing with someone you must make it a point to check-in and make sure emotional boundaries aren't being blurred. Just because it's a casual thing doesn't mean it's not a relationship of its own kind, it needs its own maintenance. Ensuring both parties are getting what they want out of it and all that jazz.

I do hope you find someone and so sorry your husband passed.
I was just starting to get into gaining so that made things harder somewhat so I just didn't mention my desire to gain to guys I dated.

Really sorry for you husband, still lives go on and is really cool you want to keep enjoying live, that being said you will first need to find someone that likes it and are into this so you dont have to start from 0 with him, then you need to put things straight and put limits to what you will want to happen before, during and after intimacy like we can go for pizzas and to someone´s place, then you will feed him or you want to be fed and finally at the end you just go or he have to go and only appear when you plan it again, and if you see each other in street or grocery store you dont know each other, is cold but that is the point is not a relationship is a deal to satisfy each other and finally have fun, life is too short to not enjoy ourselfs in this kink that give us a lot of pleasure, good luck.

First, my condolences to xOrexOx. Losing your husband is certainly a difficult pain. I understand not wanting to dive into another relationship right away.

However, I believe sex is an important part of life for almost everyone. Masturbation can be a release, but only up to a certain point. The feel and touch of another person cannot be replaced. Add your feeder, feedee, and domination desires and I can see why you need another person.

As a person who has had the opportunity to experience casual sex, I can say it is very exciting and fulfilling. I should add that I have never just met a person and had sex. I typically meet people via the internet - Fantasy Feeder, Feabie, kik, etc. We chat for a while - get to know each other, share our likes and dislikes, and see if we seem to be a good match.

Yes, it takes time, but the results can be awesome. I had a couple of experiences where we met but it didn’t click. Some others turned into long time “friends with benefits” relationships. As was said before, be honest with want you want. Keep talking about it. You can make it work.

theres alot of feeders and feedees looking for casual sex, try on feabie as well you could look for guys in your area,also on your dating profile put what your looking for you could be surprised what comes out of the wood work

After reading this i can say you are normal.
It will take time for someone to earn your trust.
If anyone is rushing you in to a relationship there probably a molignant narsisist.
Better to background check who ever you date.

I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️💔❤️

Massages may help with the touch starvedness that you are feeling.