Fat experiences

Can you curb your feederism urges?

LoraDayton:
Oh spare me. I wasn't implying intent. I was literally explaining that "this can be harmful language and maybe we should try to find another"

the fact that you are taking it personally and choosing to not listen is your problem. You think "this doesn't bother me, a queer person, so you are also not allowed to be bothered by it" is not how that works. just because you do not understand my point doesn't mean mine is moot. I am genuinely trying to have a conversation here and explain why these two things are not alike and why it is harmful to both concepts. I am trying to actually *help* others understand that conflating these two things is a bad idea.

Attraction to "A fat body" is not an orientation. That is my point. You stated it yourself. Orientation is about full relational models between *people* not bodies. If the *person* does not matter to you—then the fat is simply a sexual object; not an orietnation. Conflating the two is. in fact. homophobic. The word you are looking for is "paraphilia"


Your entire argument depends on the fact that you have defined feedism as deviant, and if you think that, you probably shouldn't be here.

Surely you understand that the word "like" means "similar to" and not "the same thing." Also, I would hope that you can imagine that for some people feedism goes far beyond sexual attraction and is a part of the personal connection in a relationship.

Honestly, this is a weird fight to pick and is super kink-shamey.
2 years

Can you curb your feederism urges?

I think she's too busy tilting at windmills

It's really not that egregious to draw a comparison between homosexuality and say attraction toward overweight people or even feederism if it's been an innate and inextricable part of your sexuality for as long as you can recall, as it has in my case.

Also, the current understanding is that there's no 'gay' gene - it's believed to be a combination of factors influencing sexuality - including exposure to certain substances in utero and early childhood experiences; that's quite possibly the case with lifelong fetishes as well.

There's evidence of structural differences between straight and gay brains, but in the context of sexual expression, it's not homophobic to draw a comparison

She's overstating the relational aspect too. My gay coworker is quite open about how he doesn't relate to 'gay culture' or lifestyle, he just likes fucking men and isn't physically attracted to women. He doesn't share any of the typical mannerisms or inflections - you wouldn't know he were gay unless he told you. In practice is that really so different to a lifelong attraction toward people with certain physical characteristics e.g. fat?

Semantically sexual orientation relates to gender preferences whilst fetishes are more of a typically non-sexual object or action that's integral to one's sexual gratification - so yeah feederism isn't a sexual orientation by definition (Call it a paraphilia if you must), but practically I don't see the issue with a comparison between sexual orientation and a lifelong fetish, even if lacks a bit of nuance.
It's certainly nothing to erupt over.
2 years

Can you curb your feederism urges?

"she" is right here

and "she" is not erupting, "she" is responding to the blatant and constant misogyny, mansplaining and condescension from the majority of *checks notes* straight men who claim to understand what sexual orientation is about, majority straight men who have clearly never truly understood what it's like to *not* be straight or ever had to doubt or question it or have it *constantly* objectified for their pleasure and gratification at the expense of others.

"she" made a post in good faith, that, sorry not sorry, didn't kowtow to a dangerous and erroneous idea that can actually cause harm to people. "she" responded in kind to the dimissal and anger "she" received from the men furious with a woman for stating that no, they are not always right.

"she" does not owe you entertainment and good fun at parties to keep you pleased. "she" has a name.
2 years

Can you curb your feederism urges?

This is really out of pocket. Lora, you've made some pretty extreme judgements and assumptions here in this thread. It's kind of crazy to be personally labeling the sexuality of people in this thread who have straight up admitted to making love to every possible gender available, so long as they're fat. And before you mislabel me too and embarrass yourself further, no I'm not straight or hetro. I'm indiscriminately attracted to fat bodies. Stop invalidating others.
2 years
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