General

No luck here or on feabie, I tend to only get either guys or spambots in my dms, with the occasional "sub to my OF". The guys are the creepiest, Had one dude ask to RP and said I could imagine he was a woman. Nope.exe. When I do reach out to someone with a Letter format introduction message that doesn't even talk about feedee/feeder stuff. I just get ghosted. Oh, and there is nobody anywhere near me.

lol ye I agree dude!

I think media makes things seem bleaker than they are.

The simple truth is, there are a lot of fat people. Not all of them are miserable or ashamed. Or tragic stories, or people looking for a way to get "cured" or made "better." Just waiting for that little "boost" of someone who makes them feel happy about being big.

Are you ok, hun? Do you need to talk?

Sadly no but i hope no day to find myself a gainer gf

Alright. That's fine. There's no need to yell.

Removing your pictures is probably the wisest option. Gives your more control over your body and your image. It's one of the many reasons my pictures aren't on this site either.

I see. Just so you know, on the internet, typing in all caps means yelling. If you want to use emphasis, you *use asteriks* or only CAPITALIZE the IMPORTANT words.

Unfortunately some people are so effete that they're traumatized by capital letters.

Congrats!

IMHO, the problem with this site is the problem with internet dating in general, and is exacerbated by a number of factors associated with this site and this genre and this group of people, many of which have already been mentioned in the comments above. Note the ethos before I go into this, I've been on this site for about 15 years (and dimensions and yahoo groups before that), since my early teens, I pay the premium sub just to support it, and I love and am committed to this site and this community. That said, there are many problems...

1. It's relatively anonymous, as is the internet in general, therefore people don't behave themselves as well as they might otherwise. Then again, this also creates a faster and more honest impression, at least of that type of person.

2. Due to the niche nature of this genre, the strong interests in it of many people here, and the consequent difficulties if not impossibilities of finding truly fulfilling sexual compatibility elsewhere, people here are often desperate on some level.

3. The genre itself is problematic. Being fat, much less gaining weight, isn't like wearing leather and ball gags in the bedroom, and it has societal implications only rivaled in magnitude by the desires of those truly turned on by it. This creates cognitive dissonance that cannot be understated. (Literally almost everything I've ever written in this genre reflects this in some way, lol.) The transgression is powerful, human beings in general are often aroused by the taboo, but one of the main reasons it's so powerful is because it is so very very difficult.

4. The genre itself is polluted in five (overlapping) ways.

4a. The first is by desperate and well-intentioned but over-aggressive guys, though this is pretty standard for internet dating and to some degree for life in general. Sorry ladies, I'd say it's the balls, but really we're just dicks. The genetic and social pressures blah blah blah, society vs the inner animal blah blah, etc. We have no excuse. Hopefully the world and humanity continues to improve on this level. I try to do my part by being an asshole to everyone equally.

4b. The second and third ways are by people that really don't live in reality, and by society in general portraying everyone in this community as such. (See the movie Feed, as well as many articles both in pop culture and in the literature.) You can see my feelings on this by my bio and a lot of the crap I write, but actual intentional weight gain in a partner is potentially really fucked up, like any other type of sexualized body modification. Now, humans in general are more fucked up, and weight gain is relatively inevitable for most people in industrialized societies, and the literature on obesity is debatable, etc. etc. excuse excuse but still. But still it's saying that, at least to society as a whole, if you're into heavy people, that you want a partner that's unhealthy, and if you're into people gaining weight, that you want a partner that's becoming unhealthy. Still, this could be excused by society, as much as anyone excuses anything, which isn't much, but then you have people that actually espouse gaining five hundred pounds, that hounds anyone that posts an image of themselves into gaining a massive amount of weight, or just doing custom work, etc. Bad apples in a community are what the community is judged for, unless there are no bad apples, in which case society makes stuff up to judge them for instead. (Insert "Thanks, Obama" joke, or maybe something even more ridiculously out of date like McGovern, lol.)