General

*----fetish*

The only way to navigate conversations is to stick to reason and evidence, and do my best to focus on what seems relevant. I have little sense of what would bother people about what seems true. Consequently, I've had mixed results "coming out" to normies, and it appears ot reveal more about their character than mine. Those who immediately insult, degrade, couch-faint or try to make me afraid are themselves slaves to their own fear(s) in those moments.

I haven't tried to come out to many people outside this community besides my partners. When I brought it up with my partners, it was only after talking about their own kinks and the kinks that I have besides feederism.

I get the feeling that most people who aren't into something *at least* as fringe as BDSM will react more judgmentally than those who understand kink firsthand.

So while I do feel somewhat "closeted" still, and that sometimes feels frustrating, it's important to remember that as important as *this* kink is to us, kink in *general* isn't nearly as important--or agreeable to converse about--to many normies.

As an autistic person and a feeder/fa, I don't feel strongly about this. It's just a part of me. I'm blessed to have friends who either are feedists or at least accepting of it. Still, I don't feel a strong desire to tell the whole world. Not because I'm ashamed but because it's none of their business.

It's like telling people you like vanilla sex. Nothing shameful, but it's no one's business.

Agreed.

Also autistic. I rarely volunteer any info at all.

I'm autistic

And have shared my fetish with others that I know, but I don't really view it as a big "coming out as a fat lover" kinda deal

But tbf moat my friends did find out I was into this by accident lol

It appears I used the term too generally. What I meant was just telling someone that I wanted to gain weight, and only if and when it was somehow relevant to the conversation.

That definitely seems like information that you would only share when it’s relevant to the conversation. I think you’re good.

I'm some flavour of neurodivergent (not diagnosed) and just wanted to add my two cents.

I agree that generally you're not going to be talking about your kinks unless it's in a kink context.

However, my neurodivergence often comes in the sense of not really having a filter for things I like! So I'm enthusiastic about adjacent topics like body positivity, fat activism, food in general, and stuff like that. And anytime I am in a relationship, I tend to be very enthusiastic to other people about how amazing and attractive my partner is and they get the point.

But yeah, I guess that's where I draw the line. I don't go around talking about kink stuff, but then on the other hand I want people in my life who matter to know at least something about this super important part of me that I happen to think is pretty cool.

Acknowledged