5 months
Exhausting
BigBallBellyGirl:
Thanks in advance for letting me get something off my chest. I just wanted to make the point that, this community is more than a dating hub, and this isn't OnlyFans.
Some people come here hoping to make a romantic connection. I hope you do, and I wish you all the happiness in the world.
Some people come here hoping to share what they look like, showcase content, and build a following. I wish you every bit of success, and I hope the way you choose to use this site helps you reach your goals.
That said, that's not all of us. Some of us are here because society has made it so taboo to actually enjoy our bigger bodies and have fun with gluttony, we can't talk about this major part of our lives with 90 percent of the people we know. Sure, they know we're fat. I'm nearly 470 pounds. It's obvious I like to eat. But that's very different that being able to share the joy I feel when I gain 10 pounds or consume 20,000 calories.
There are a lot of people here who respect the ways in which different people use this site, including those who use it more privately. But there are also others who are outraged that I don't want a feeder (I have a partner), I don't want anyone to send me money or food, and I'm not a content creator. I'm very specific about this in my profile, yet just about every day, I get angry messages from mostly men, demanding, "Show yourself" or "Your posts do nothing to turn me on. I need pictures." No. No you don't. You don't need pictures from me or anyone else of any gender on this site. There are plenty of platforms on which to find those and plenty of other people to follow. No one is entitled to anything from anyone else.
I'll add a caveat of that if, someone with no personal photos is demanding money, it's only natural to want some proof you're not being scammed. That's entirely different, and in that case, people have a right to protect themselves from con artists. People don't have a right, however, to make angry demands of someone who has never initiated contact with them and asks nothing of them.
People have a lot of reasons for not posting images. In my case, I have a partner, and he meets my needs in every way. I don't need to get anything anywhere else, including compliments or gratification. Furthermore, I used to have a very public online presence, and I had pictures stolen twice. I had to go through a huge hassle to get a fake profile taken down from another site. And to this day, there is still an amateur weight gain progress video out there using my images. That's a violation. And it feels very unsafe.
I guess I said this to say, there are lots of comments about how women especially create profiles and then disappear. I can't speak for everyone, but I do know that an aggressive follower can certainly be a trigger. Sure, we can report folks, and there is a block function. But more than that, we can respect each other and keep our entitlement in check. It's not really a lot to ask. And thanks to all the awesome people on the site who already understand that!
Thanks in advance for letting me get something off my chest. I just wanted to make the point that, this community is more than a dating hub, and this isn't OnlyFans.
Some people come here hoping to make a romantic connection. I hope you do, and I wish you all the happiness in the world.
Some people come here hoping to share what they look like, showcase content, and build a following. I wish you every bit of success, and I hope the way you choose to use this site helps you reach your goals.
That said, that's not all of us. Some of us are here because society has made it so taboo to actually enjoy our bigger bodies and have fun with gluttony, we can't talk about this major part of our lives with 90 percent of the people we know. Sure, they know we're fat. I'm nearly 470 pounds. It's obvious I like to eat. But that's very different that being able to share the joy I feel when I gain 10 pounds or consume 20,000 calories.
There are a lot of people here who respect the ways in which different people use this site, including those who use it more privately. But there are also others who are outraged that I don't want a feeder (I have a partner), I don't want anyone to send me money or food, and I'm not a content creator. I'm very specific about this in my profile, yet just about every day, I get angry messages from mostly men, demanding, "Show yourself" or "Your posts do nothing to turn me on. I need pictures." No. No you don't. You don't need pictures from me or anyone else of any gender on this site. There are plenty of platforms on which to find those and plenty of other people to follow. No one is entitled to anything from anyone else.
I'll add a caveat of that if, someone with no personal photos is demanding money, it's only natural to want some proof you're not being scammed. That's entirely different, and in that case, people have a right to protect themselves from con artists. People don't have a right, however, to make angry demands of someone who has never initiated contact with them and asks nothing of them.
People have a lot of reasons for not posting images. In my case, I have a partner, and he meets my needs in every way. I don't need to get anything anywhere else, including compliments or gratification. Furthermore, I used to have a very public online presence, and I had pictures stolen twice. I had to go through a huge hassle to get a fake profile taken down from another site. And to this day, there is still an amateur weight gain progress video out there using my images. That's a violation. And it feels very unsafe.
I guess I said this to say, there are lots of comments about how women especially create profiles and then disappear. I can't speak for everyone, but I do know that an aggressive follower can certainly be a trigger. Sure, we can report folks, and there is a block function. But more than that, we can respect each other and keep our entitlement in check. It's not really a lot to ask. And thanks to all the awesome people on the site who already understand that!
It seems to be all too common regardless of which site it is related to and feeder type of content. I'm sorry you have to go through so many hoops just to avoid harassment from so many feeder hungry guys. Even from the other sites I've gone to the dms I've received have always been so extremely straight forward without any sort of introduction and just getting straight to the point like, "Here to fatten you up fat cow," or something along those lines.
I'd say you put it very well said, this is a message I believe most of it not all of the members of this specific community should look to and keep in mind. The one rule I follow when it comes to interactions online is that no matter the context, please try to treat the other person as if it were any other kind of relationship or friendship, as you would with many other people IRL. A lot of people here aren't looking for hardcore fulfillment of specific fantasies and are truly looking to form a meaningful connection.
In the end, for anyone reading this, try your best to give the best amount of respect you can in your interactions. Don't step over the boundaries they might create and overall just be a kind person.
Again, very well said
5 months
Exhausting
MessyEater:
I feel like the online community has changed a lot since FF began and perhaps the site needs to be more specific about what it is and perhaps even have a code of conduct.
I feel like the online community has changed a lot since FF began and perhaps the site needs to be more specific about what it is and perhaps even have a code of conduct.
every single site with membership on the planet has a TOS (essentially code of conduct, some are smart enough to label them clearly) and it doesn't mean anything at the end of the day when owners prioritize revenue over safety.
I'm not exaggerating when I say one day someone will be unalived because of the behavior that is *encouraged* by these sites collectively. Not one more than another another, they are all different and yet the result will be the same.
It's a systemic issue that starts from the outside in. It's patriarchy, misogyny, fatphobia, ableism, racism, etc., that people can and will gleefully engage in to get whatever they want, regardless of who it harms, and especially if they can do so without consequence (eg harassing, objectifying, impersonating, and profiting off of fat people).
that is to say, people gotta work on this stuff and handle it whenver they see it in real life outside of here and places like this.
5 months
