I'm very sorry to hear that.

However, if you do come across scammers, please report them.

Side note: I'm a man.

And no, at no point did I say all skinny women are bitches. I would never say such a thing, I've never said such a thing.

As an aside, my mother is a small woman, and she's anything but a bitch. Sure, in retrospect I think she made some mistakes, but her heart was always in the right place and I thought she tried to do the best she could, knowing what she knew.

Whether that teacher was skinny or fat, I would have thought she was bitchy anyway. At the time, her physical size had nothing to do with it, but just so happened to be skinny.

I must be abundantly clear on the following point. As a general rule, I would never call or deem someone a "bitch," or an "asshole" until that individual has done something to me, or possibly to others to ultimately earn that title, particularly if that individual refuses to be reasonable and there's an ongoing pattern that won't cease.

That, is a very far cry from the stereotypical frat-boy attitude where women in general are referred to as bitches like they're just meat and something to have sex with. Or the misogynistic He-man Women Haters Club attitude of how they're supposedly all conniving and evil for no other reason for having been born with two X chromosomes. Either of those, I consider a disgusting attitude that should remain in the 20th century, although in some places it seems to persist.

Perhaps this is the kind of response Kitsune was looking for, were he still here and hadn't deleted his account.



I sense that you are asking for context, I just hope you like the answer. I also hope you read the above section.

I was 5 years old, and this was the kindergarten teacher who I considered a bit of a bitch. It was so long ago, the Soviet Union was still around.

I don't remember much from that year, but I vaguely remember it was strong dislike that eventually devolved into hate. I don't think she liked me very much either, as if I was a pain in the ass she was forced to tolerate. There is however, one day that really stuck out to me.

One day, I guess was some sort of arts & crafts activity, and the assignment was to make a picture of a log cabin from the supplies provided, I think maybe because the topic earlier that day was Abraham Lincoln. The supplies consisted of construction paper of various colors, scissors, glue, tape, markers/pencils/pens, and.. straight shaped pretzel sticks that I guess were supposed to be the "logs."

5 year old me.. I ate the pretzel sticks, thinking they were supposed to be a snack. The teacher didn't point out they were intended for the assignment. When I figured it out, seeing what the other kids were doing, I asked for more pretzel sticks. She basically said "too bad, so sad, tough shit, suck it up." (not literally, but that's the gist) No apologies. I felt mislead, humiliated, and angry. At that age, that shit really stings - still does.

I tried to complete the assignment as best I could despite that, and tried to kind of make it up to look like the inside of the cabin. But I have no idea if anyone else picked up on it. It was easily the worst one.

Back then, of course I didn't have much life experience, didn't really understand nuance. Was I being fair? I don't know. The teacher seemed bitchy to me.

Overall, it was apparently bad enough, my parents moved to another house to change school districts.

I'll also point out that a preschool teacher I had, she was fat and she seemed nice, as did many others who were fat.

The school bus driver I had during kindergarten, she was also fat and one day she took all of us kids out for ice cream.

Santa Claus is also always portrayed as fat.

Was this logical? No, probably not. But 5 year olds aren't really known for being the most logical. I've often thought back and wondered where my preference for fat people came from, but I can't think of any one particular event.

Eventually, I would meet more counterexamples. Some skinny people who were actually nice, and some fat people who sadly weren't so nice. But maybe by that point the association was established.

I hope this clear things up, and sorry for the long post.

WooPlus is another simpfest and a complete waste of time, the way most niche dating sites/apps are. I checked it out for maybe a couple weeks, but I'll probably just delete it.

Niche dating sites all suffer from the same problem of network effect too. There's never enough users, so why even bother to stick around? Why pay when no one on there is active anyway?

If you want to go through the online route for a possible relationship, it's best to stick with the largest, most mainstream services you can, because they actually have users who are active.

I don't think anything really properly compares to FF these days. It's pretty remarkable really, since it's the third online web site in the feederism space I'm aware of, and the second oldest one that's still around.

It's also the only one I can think of that has managed to strike a good balance with fostering a friendly, open community largely free of toxicity and has kept that up for more than 20 years.

A lot have come and go, either fizzling into nothing or turning monstrous or toxic. For the sake of brevity I'm not talking about the ones that are defunct.

FatCelebs/Curvage - It started off as a borderline creepy voyeuristic message board, albeit minus the nudity. Some members would even go around and take pictures of random people. Legally, if you go out in public you don't have the right not to be photographed or recorded, but this still rubbed me the wrong way somehow. Lot of creepy comments though. On one occasion, I think I remember one of the subjects even got doxxed, at which point it turned into danger, and from what I recall that information was up for too long.

Eventually, it devolved into a discount/knockoff version of OnlyFans and ManyVids and has been a simpfest ever since. I haven't checked it out since, since before COVID at least. Whatever it is, it's NOT a place where you can really hope to make any actual, genuine connections, friends or romance.

Grommr - A subsidiary of Grokio, LLC, it's focused pretty much entirely on the gay side of feederism. They do have a competent technical team behind it, but I can't speak to the quality of the community as I've never been.

Feabie - Created by the same team as Grommr as another subsidiary of Grokio, LLC, they have the same solid technical team. However, community development leaves a lot to be desired. I never really interacted on there much, but reports say it's full of toxicity and is very cliquish. Yeah, I don't have any time for that. I haven't checked it out in years either, it's probably worse now, if anything. My recommendation is to give it a pass.

AOL and Yahoo Groups are long gone. Maybe if you get lucky on Reddit? Most boards on Reddit are simpfests and shitshows though, so you'd have to dig through a LOT of crap, but you might find the occasional diamond in the rough.

I'd say FF is the best out of all of them.

Be careful about fast food.

When I was a teenager, I worked at one; a McD's franchise.

The policy was that I was *not* supposed to eat fries straight out of the heater (likely more for hygiene reasons than being stingy as hell).

However, they were pretty stingy. It wasn't free, but a 50% discount. Furthermore, that only applied to half an hour before and after the shift, or during official break times, not the few minutes here and there to have a smoke or use the restroom where you'd stay on the clock.

I've since seen some franchisees being even more stingy, only offering 30%.

The only free food I could get was any beverages or that because I regularly worked the closing shift (that location closed at 9PM), I regularly took the leftover pies. The only rule was for the manager on duty to record them as waste, since they obviously couldn't be sold the next day. There was also a policy to keep at least 2 pies of each type available, precooked, for immediate sale, so it was guaranteed there would be some.

You're definitely not getting fat off of that. At best it might help restore the calories burned during the shift.

Even crueler, I've heard that at all Tim Hortons locations, employees are banned from taking the waste home with them at closing time, and that's why I will never buy from one.

Free food and catered lunches are definitely a nice bonus, but let me be clear. The only thing you should be looking at is the pay and size of your paycheck, paid time off, and healthcare coverage. Even employee discounts are relatively worthless.

Wal-Mart offers a 10% discount to employees, which sounds nice at first, but consider this. Suppose you spend $500/mo. at Wal-Mart, which you probably don't, but suppose you do. The 10% discount reduces that to $450, for a $50 value. Suppose you work very part-time, once a week, 8 hours each time. That's an average of about 34 hours, 40 minutes a month, making the value of the benefit to be only $1.44 an hour. If you work more than that, and you probably will, the effective value is even less than that.

Maybe if you're a teenager or young adult, and you know of a local bakery business of some sort (not as many as you might think) that has a strong focus on freshness (*very* important), perhaps that would provide a lot of waste that they'd be happy to let you take home.

Or if you're lucky, certain pizza places, depending on how stingy they want to be.

But in the long run, this is not a benefit that should really be prioritized. The primary focus should always be the pay, followed by paid time off and healthcare coverage. Never, ever switch to another job that pays less because of free food. It's never going to be worth it.

If you are referring to my post, I reread it twice and I don't see where I was being derogatory against plus size women?

That was certainly not my intent.

I would certainly be interested in reading your experiences sometime.

I wouldn't say I was particularly active back then, but I certainly remember mostly lurking around a lot of that old stuff. Back when Yahoo Groups were still a thing. Back when Kelligrrl and SexyMic were still active. Back when Dimensions was more than just a message board, yet was pretty much the only game in town, AOL and Yahoo notwithstanding.

Think I even still remember back then, the kind of feeling I had when I first discovered this sort of thing online. I remember seeing the various weight loss ads on magazines or on TV, and thinking that at least 95% of the time, the before picture looked better. I guess at some point, I wondered if there was anyone who was deliberately trying to get fatter on purpose.

So, I searched on Excite!, or perhaps it was Lycos or Yahoo Search. I think I used a phrase like:

"weight gain" "before and after" pictures

Or phrases like:

"getting fatter" pictures

The quotes were important to match the literal phrase, because otherwise searching for weight gain could return results about gaining confidence from weight loss, which was not what I was looking for at all.

At that point, I discovered Dimensions. I don't really know how else to describe it, so here goes. It was almost as if St. Peter opened up the gates in the sky, and the angels were all singing Hallelujah! It totally blew my mind at the time. I wasn't crazy! It wasn't just me! Somewhere, in this big wide world, there were others who felt as I do.

Keep in mind this was a time when you would be made to feel bad if you ever dared admit that a 5'3", 160 lb girl was possibly attractive, and didn't want her to lose 40 lbs. And don't even dare think, much less admit out loud that you wish she'd gain 40 lbs, and maybe even more than that.

The department stores never had any plus-size mannequins, and suggesting that one use Lane Bryant clothes was derogatory.

This was also when just a few years earlier, the film What's Eating Gilbert Grape? was released. I didn't like how his mother was portrayed, that she was basically a depressed shut-in who never left the house, and that she was fat only because she became a slob who didn't care about anything. Then in the final scene where she went to the courthouse to post bail for her other son who's mentally disabled, everyone around her pointed and laughed at her, mocking how fat she was.

I certainly couldn't really understand such attitudes. Most of the fat people I met back then, actually seemed very nice. Yet I remember this skinny kindergarten teacher I had who was skinny but also a bit of a bitch, like the Wicked Witch of the West.

Very dark times indeed back then, the 90s and before. I hope they never come back.

The funny thing is, I actually saw that film again recently and while the film was still as sad as I remember, Gilbert's mother actually wasn't that big after all. Any time I go out the door, I'm guaranteed to see quite a few people as big as she is, or even bigger. No one cares anymore or gives them any grief.

I don't even know how many hours I spent looking through and getting lost on the entire web site of Dimensions. All the stories from the Weight Room, all the personal accounts, the featured images of Kelligrrl and others, and so on.

I even remember Dimensions had a mod for The Sims 1 for fat sims, and I regret not downloading it. A couple years ago someone asked me if I had those files, and I had to disappoint him. It didn't help that I was using dial-up, and that download would have taken a long time.

Maybe don't lead with being a virgin. It is what it is, but it's not something to brag about. Never lead with something perceived as negative in most of society.

I'm not saying this to be mean, but never lead with anything negative like that. I would tell you the exact same advice if you lead with something else like "I haven't been on a date in years."

The only thing that will do is invite questions as to why this is, which can lead down a rabbit-hole of other questions you really don't want them to be asking, like "what's wrong with this person?" This could then result in "yeah I'm giving that person a wide berth."

If you want me to delete the thread entirely, please let me know and I'd be happy to do so.

In the meantime, I think this belongs in the personals board.