Man, are you on the wrong site!

See "Deciding to Get Fat" on my site.

Technically it's a "paraphilia".

Another idea: find a fat doctor.

"How to Get Fat" on my site may help.

There seem to be differing opinions on the health benefits. See en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coconut_oil

I know, if he starts talking about diets, you say "Sorry, I can't hear what you're saying. I've got this problem with my ear..."

This place, assuming they keep the employee discount:

If your doctor suggests a diet, tell him only 2% of diets work in the long run. A much higher percentage of diets CAUSE even more weight gain. Why does he think it would be any different for you?

Reminds me of a cartoon: