If I recall, originally it put you wherever your ISP was. I don't know when or why it changed, but there were complaints then, too. I uspect there will always be complaints, no matter what. Not that I love the default setting locations as they are, lol.

I guess I don't think about this matter the same way as some others. I don't think that our preferences are the same in public and in the bedroom--I know mine aren't. For whatever reason, I take space and have authority in everyday life; I haven't always liked it, but I have come to accept it.

Sexually, I prefer not to be in control. I prefer a Daddy, though I don't mean in the ABDL sense. I'm convinced there's a relationship between the two: I get tired of dealing all the time in the everyday, and having someone make decisions for me is a huge turn-on.

But there's one more thing: I think Dom/me/s and Subs exchange power knowingly and freely. It doesn't work if there is a real imbalance of power between two people. If the sub doesn't give permission freely and knowingly, then it's abuse, not BDSM. If you presume that means something more than the purely physical, the boundaries take some thought and exploration.

Just a theory, but it feels right about me, anyway.

What I think is my main fear is never being able to control it. It comes from lots of things in my history, including gaining when I didn't want to, and looooong tedious struggles to lose. But I think it has much deeper roots in issues about control that I think I share with many, many people.

I thought this was pure fat hatred. Not that I don't love seeing fat people, but I hate fat suits--hugely. I have yet to see a single instance of the use of a fat suit that isn't fat hating. (And let's not rake over the old Shallow Hal debate again, please. There is disagreement about that film--and it is best left to lie fallow in it's own inconsistency.)

I loved it. So smart and funny and fierce.

This is a complicated issue, as so many posters have contributed to pointing out.

First of all, if we don't have enough money to pay for kids with diagnosed disabilities, there's already something seriously wrong with the system and how it's funded. But people in the US are always so anti-tax--that's one major factor that leads to inadequate services.

Second, I agree that people shouldn't play the system. Without doubt.

Third, what if you start to gain and something happens to you as a possible result? like legal blindness from diabetes? Do you still not get any money? If you're an idiot and engage in street racing and end up a paraplegic, should the state not pay for you?

Fourth, who should determine whether the person is genuinely disabled or not? or whether or not they got that way by intention? Suppose I can't get around in part due to my size. Some people--and I know there are some of you who dont' believe this, but I *know* it's true--get very fat without meaning to. How should a social worker decide who's deserving and who's not?

Systems that try to figure out who deserves benefits and who doesn't almost always end up being cruel to people who are vulnerable and can't handle it. I would rather live in a system that took a bit more money from me and took care of people than one that treats people like they're lying scum before they open their mouths.

My sense from guys here is that there's no one story, but rather many different ones. Along any axis--sub/dom, active/passive, masculine/feminine, etc--there are guys who fall anywhere along the spectrum. A joyously infinite number of variations and patterns!

Thanks, Winterstocking and lilwitchygirl.

@Winterstocking--while I still think it's wrong, I probably would pay for the larger seat. It matters to me to be comfortable. But when I was younger, I probably wouldn't have, though it depends on how much. I might always have paid $50 more.

@lilwitchygirl--I wonder if the same is true of other airlines? It might be worth calling and asking each time we fly, I guess...

The first time this issue came up, I was working for an orchestra, and some fat women came and said they wanted seating that fit them. Me and the other fat woman in the office giggled embarrassedly, but the thin marketing person said 'Why should they be uncomfortable? They paid the same as everyone else.' Quite a lesson.

I often think those of us who are fat have been less inclined to see the justice we deserve. We're too used to apologising.

My daughter was totally androgynously skinny when on ADD meds, and when she came off she gained about 40 lbs, I'd guess--she never offered, I never asked. She looks great--exactly the body you want, though sadly she doesn't.

She's a little queer thing, or more specifically, bigendered, and doesn't like having hips and breasts. I'm sympathetic, though I wish she could like her own body more just as it is.

Brava! I couldn't have said it better myself.