2 years in. my experiences. my wins+what not to do.
Iridescent Pearly:
It's been about two years since I joined this community. I've had ups and downs.(mostly downs) but that's expected when you live in a world as lively as ours.
Aside from being an espresso with a D at the start. I guess I wanna kind of give a recap so people don't do what I did and have a smoother journey than me.
DISCLAIMER
This is my story so yours will be different and is not the definitive truth.)
Lets start with the not so great experiences I had and how I learned from it.
MESSAGING)
Starting with being TOO nice. It's great to be kind we all love nice people they are truly a treasure in society. But unfortunately I gave too much of my aces to some very very selfish people, who took advantage of my kindness. Draining my patience and finances. I WOULD literally make posts saying I'd be someones feeder. IT DOESN'T WORK. It does the opposite infact. I had a live in feedee who ended up being 10 years older than me, and I felt like I was raising a child it became very one sided. No were not a thing anymore.
NETWORKING)
AVOID Feabie. If you are unfamiliar with this website. I strongly advise that you stay away from there. The site evolved from community to self promotion very quickly. The mods are NOT inclusive its even a fineprint when you sign up, so my fellow queers you are not welcome. I complained on the site and I got perma-banned. But that was one of the best things that could happen.
IN PERSON)
IF YOU HAVE A BAD FEELING THEN ITS PROBABLY RIGHT. I consider myself lucky because I've had so many close calls. I can't tell you how many times, I've had met the most desperate and touch depriven people that really really wanted to come over to their place only for me to elaborate a clever story on how I need to leave.
WHEN THINGS AREN'T GOING YOUR WAY.)
Don't do what I do. I complain and whine. No one likes whiners. Things are hard but it isn't impossible. Don't obsess over why you got blocked, or someone isn't responding. Some people handle rejecting others differently than others. I mean hell I've had people make straight up mean comments on why they don't like me. But I'm still here. WHY? I have no Idea hahaha.
GAINING WEIGHT)
I WISH I COULD TELL YOUNGER ME THIS (even tho its only been 2 years
). Don't rush the weight gain. It will come, like all things in life its a process. I found that when I turned 24 my metabolism decided to go on vacation and my weight shot up 60lbs in the past 1.5 years. You wont magically become 300lbs if you eat 10 cupcakes (even tho it feels that way) enjoy the process of gaining . Now I gain weight unintentionally I don't think about it you can see my progress in my own profile pic.
I originally was gonna post something about complaining how I am going to be a loner forever. But at least I can speak my mind on this site and not get banned.
Thanks for reading!
-Zoe
It's been about two years since I joined this community. I've had ups and downs.(mostly downs) but that's expected when you live in a world as lively as ours.
Aside from being an espresso with a D at the start. I guess I wanna kind of give a recap so people don't do what I did and have a smoother journey than me.
DISCLAIMER
This is my story so yours will be different and is not the definitive truth.)Lets start with the not so great experiences I had and how I learned from it.
MESSAGING)
Starting with being TOO nice. It's great to be kind we all love nice people they are truly a treasure in society. But unfortunately I gave too much of my aces to some very very selfish people, who took advantage of my kindness. Draining my patience and finances. I WOULD literally make posts saying I'd be someones feeder. IT DOESN'T WORK. It does the opposite infact. I had a live in feedee who ended up being 10 years older than me, and I felt like I was raising a child it became very one sided. No were not a thing anymore.
NETWORKING)
AVOID Feabie. If you are unfamiliar with this website. I strongly advise that you stay away from there. The site evolved from community to self promotion very quickly. The mods are NOT inclusive its even a fineprint when you sign up, so my fellow queers you are not welcome. I complained on the site and I got perma-banned. But that was one of the best things that could happen.
IN PERSON)
IF YOU HAVE A BAD FEELING THEN ITS PROBABLY RIGHT. I consider myself lucky because I've had so many close calls. I can't tell you how many times, I've had met the most desperate and touch depriven people that really really wanted to come over to their place only for me to elaborate a clever story on how I need to leave.
WHEN THINGS AREN'T GOING YOUR WAY.)
Don't do what I do. I complain and whine. No one likes whiners. Things are hard but it isn't impossible. Don't obsess over why you got blocked, or someone isn't responding. Some people handle rejecting others differently than others. I mean hell I've had people make straight up mean comments on why they don't like me. But I'm still here. WHY? I have no Idea hahaha.
GAINING WEIGHT)
I WISH I COULD TELL YOUNGER ME THIS (even tho its only been 2 years
). Don't rush the weight gain. It will come, like all things in life its a process. I found that when I turned 24 my metabolism decided to go on vacation and my weight shot up 60lbs in the past 1.5 years. You wont magically become 300lbs if you eat 10 cupcakes (even tho it feels that way) enjoy the process of gaining . Now I gain weight unintentionally I don't think about it you can see my progress in my own profile pic. I originally was gonna post something about complaining how I am going to be a loner forever. But at least I can speak my mind on this site and not get banned.
Thanks for reading!
-Zoe
These are all good takes.
I also wanna add that if you feel out of your depth, like you don't have enough life experience to handle these kinds of spaces, it's okay to take a break.
Never underestimate taking the time to work on yourself. Not only will it be easier to form connections, but it will also be easier to avoid bad situations.
8 months
