Fattening in secret
Munchies:
It is complicated for sure.
I'm of the mind that everyone has the right to bodily autonomy. I don't think someone should have to get permission from their spouse to get fat.
However, the true issue is not the fetish. This disagreement they have with OP's fetish appears to be a proxy to a much larger issue. I don't know if it's something between them or an internal issue that OP's wife hasn't dealt with. But it is very clear to me that the true issue has nothing to do with his fetish at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
We have a great marriage and get along very well. We’ve never given each other reasons to not trust or anything like that. She has always had body issues and since our daughter was born it’s gotten worse. I do my best to reassure her she is beautiful and attractive but she says she doesn’t believe me
Munchies:
And there it is.
This is a case of internalized fatphobia projected outward. She sees herself getting fat as failure on her part. I wouldn't be shocked if she's been living vicariously through your fitness, either. A bit of "I might be fat, but at least I have a muscular man that loves me. At least if I have him, I won't be a complete failure."
And then you come out and tell her you want to be fat, too.
Now, don't get me wrong. The way you planned on gaining was objectively stupid, and I am glad you decided not to do it this way. But she would have been upset no matter how you chose to do it.
I doubt this is a trust issue on her end. She probably hasn't engaged with these thoughts very much - if at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
Out of curiosity, what would happen from drinking a quart of heavy cream and maltodextrin?
It is complicated for sure.
I'm of the mind that everyone has the right to bodily autonomy. I don't think someone should have to get permission from their spouse to get fat.
However, the true issue is not the fetish. This disagreement they have with OP's fetish appears to be a proxy to a much larger issue. I don't know if it's something between them or an internal issue that OP's wife hasn't dealt with. But it is very clear to me that the true issue has nothing to do with his fetish at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
We have a great marriage and get along very well. We’ve never given each other reasons to not trust or anything like that. She has always had body issues and since our daughter was born it’s gotten worse. I do my best to reassure her she is beautiful and attractive but she says she doesn’t believe me
Munchies:
And there it is.
This is a case of internalized fatphobia projected outward. She sees herself getting fat as failure on her part. I wouldn't be shocked if she's been living vicariously through your fitness, either. A bit of "I might be fat, but at least I have a muscular man that loves me. At least if I have him, I won't be a complete failure."
And then you come out and tell her you want to be fat, too.
Now, don't get me wrong. The way you planned on gaining was objectively stupid, and I am glad you decided not to do it this way. But she would have been upset no matter how you chose to do it.
I doubt this is a trust issue on her end. She probably hasn't engaged with these thoughts very much - if at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
Out of curiosity, what would happen from drinking a quart of heavy cream and maltodextrin?
Well, between the severe insulin spikes and elevated triglyceride levels?
Nothing good.
9 months
Fattening in secret
LoLbreadplease:
This is a tough question. My spouse is also not into this fetish. It hasn't been easy, but we've gotten to a point where he understands that his wife is fat now, but he knows he loves me for me, and he's willing to rub my belly because it's what I need. I personally don't think our weight is something our spouses should control. I don't think your wife should get to say, no you can't gain weight, when it's simply not her decision. She doesn't have to like it, but ideally she understands why youre doing it and can compromise. If you guys can't reach a compromise, if she says she can't stand by and be witness, but you still go for it, you do run the risk of ending the relationship over this. I think you have decide what's worth it for you.
One thing that helped me was reading about what to do if one spouse is into a fetish and the other isn't. If the spouse is able to, I think they should find a way to support their partners. Maybe they can't, if the fetish is BDSM, and they have a history of trauma. That could end the relationship. But exploring one's fetish is very important. I think your spouse should understand our fetishes are part of our sexualities, and our sexualities are part of our identities, and it would not be fair if you're never allowed to take part in your fetish.
Some ways they can support without participating: learning about it or talking about it with you. Or allowing you space to explore it, like time when you can be on the internet engaging with others in the community.
Munchies was right that the answer isn't to gain behind her back. Try to reach an agreement before you gain. If she is never going to be ok with it, if she is going to kink shame you while you're gaining, that's not ok. She has to know you're doing it and why you're doing it, and coexist with it, and you have to hold your end of the bargain.
Also, I hope she's not kink shaming you, that's not ok.
I'm sorry she will not touch your love handles. You are a sexy human.
Munchies:
It is complicated for sure.
I'm of the mind that everyone has the right to bodily autonomy. I don't think someone should have to get permission from their spouse to get fat.
However, the true issue is not the fetish. This disagreement they have with OP's fetish appears to be a proxy to a much larger issue. I don't know if it's something between them or an internal issue that OP's wife hasn't dealt with. But it is very clear to me that the true issue has nothing to do with his fetish at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
We have a great marriage and get along very well. We’ve never given each other reasons to not trust or anything like that. She has always had body issues and since our daughter was born it’s gotten worse. I do my best to reassure her she is beautiful and attractive but she says she doesn’t believe me
This is a tough question. My spouse is also not into this fetish. It hasn't been easy, but we've gotten to a point where he understands that his wife is fat now, but he knows he loves me for me, and he's willing to rub my belly because it's what I need. I personally don't think our weight is something our spouses should control. I don't think your wife should get to say, no you can't gain weight, when it's simply not her decision. She doesn't have to like it, but ideally she understands why youre doing it and can compromise. If you guys can't reach a compromise, if she says she can't stand by and be witness, but you still go for it, you do run the risk of ending the relationship over this. I think you have decide what's worth it for you.
One thing that helped me was reading about what to do if one spouse is into a fetish and the other isn't. If the spouse is able to, I think they should find a way to support their partners. Maybe they can't, if the fetish is BDSM, and they have a history of trauma. That could end the relationship. But exploring one's fetish is very important. I think your spouse should understand our fetishes are part of our sexualities, and our sexualities are part of our identities, and it would not be fair if you're never allowed to take part in your fetish.
Some ways they can support without participating: learning about it or talking about it with you. Or allowing you space to explore it, like time when you can be on the internet engaging with others in the community.
Munchies was right that the answer isn't to gain behind her back. Try to reach an agreement before you gain. If she is never going to be ok with it, if she is going to kink shame you while you're gaining, that's not ok. She has to know you're doing it and why you're doing it, and coexist with it, and you have to hold your end of the bargain.
Also, I hope she's not kink shaming you, that's not ok.
I'm sorry she will not touch your love handles. You are a sexy human.
Munchies:
It is complicated for sure.
I'm of the mind that everyone has the right to bodily autonomy. I don't think someone should have to get permission from their spouse to get fat.
However, the true issue is not the fetish. This disagreement they have with OP's fetish appears to be a proxy to a much larger issue. I don't know if it's something between them or an internal issue that OP's wife hasn't dealt with. But it is very clear to me that the true issue has nothing to do with his fetish at all.
Ninjaturtle94:
We have a great marriage and get along very well. We’ve never given each other reasons to not trust or anything like that. She has always had body issues and since our daughter was born it’s gotten worse. I do my best to reassure her she is beautiful and attractive but she says she doesn’t believe me
And there it is.
This is a case of internalized fatphobia projected outward. She sees herself getting fat as failure on her part. I wouldn't be shocked if she's been living vicariously through your fitness, either. A bit of "I might be fat, but at least I have a muscular man that loves me. At least if I have him, I won't be a complete failure."
And then you come out and tell her you want to be fat, too.
Now, don't get me wrong. The way you planned on gaining was objectively stupid, and I am glad you decided not to do it this way. But she would have been upset no matter how you chose to do it.
I doubt this is a trust issue on her end. She probably hasn't engaged with these thoughts very much - if at all.
9 months
Clothes
BobHoops00:
Me and my are in a feederism relationship. Me the feeder, my wife the feedee, she's currently 210lb. It's mainly in her stomach. But we're kinda new to this. Where can she find Plus Size clothing that's not expensive? We tried Walmart, Target and Torrid. But she didn't like the look (too plain looking). So where can we go? Thanks ✌️
Me and my are in a feederism relationship. Me the feeder, my wife the feedee, she's currently 210lb. It's mainly in her stomach. But we're kinda new to this. Where can she find Plus Size clothing that's not expensive? We tried Walmart, Target and Torrid. But she didn't like the look (too plain looking). So where can we go? Thanks ✌️
Torrid ain't cheap. But if you see it as such, then go to JC Penny's or Kohl's. YOu can get a lot of good deals there and the clothes are pretty cute.
9 months
23f i’ve been gaining too fast and it’s getting harder to control
Joshuanorris198:
Try to use the meal plan and make sure you include muscle relaxers and appetite stimulants and 20x of lactation hormone pills
Try to use the meal plan and make sure you include muscle relaxers and appetite stimulants and 20x of lactation hormone pills
Do not do this unless you wish to die of End Stage Renal Disease. I can promise you it is a slow, painful way to die.
And unless you can get a kidney transplant (they won't give it to you if you are too fat), you have no choice but to go on dialysis until you eventually die.
Joshuanorris, you should be ashamed of yourself.
9 months
Fattening in secret
LoLbreadplease:
This is a tough question. My spouse is also not into this fetish. It hasn't been easy, but we've gotten to a point where he understands that his wife is fat now, but he knows he loves me for me, and he's willing to rub my belly because it's what I need. I personally don't think our weight is something our spouses should control. I don't think your wife should get to say, no you can't gain weight, when it's simply not her decision. She doesn't have to like it, but ideally she understands why youre doing it and can compromise. If you guys can't reach a compromise, if she says she can't stand by and be witness, but you still go for it, you do run the risk of ending the relationship over this. I think you have decide what's worth it for you.
One thing that helped me was reading about what to do if one spouse is into a fetish and the other isn't. If the spouse is able to, I think they should find a way to support their partners. Maybe they can't, if the fetish is BDSM, and they have a history of trauma. That could end the relationship. But exploring one's fetish is very important. I think your spouse should understand our fetishes are part of our sexualities, and our sexualities are part of our identities, and it would not be fair if you're never allowed to take part in your fetish.
Some ways they can support without participating: learning about it or talking about it with you. Or allowing you space to explore it, like time when you can be on the internet engaging with others in the community.
Munchies was right that the answer isn't to gain behind her back. Try to reach an agreement before you gain. If she is never going to be ok with it, if she is going to kink shame you while you're gaining, that's not ok. She has to know you're doing it and why you're doing it, and coexist with it, and you have to hold your end of the bargain.
Also, I hope she's not kink shaming you, that's not ok.
I'm sorry she will not touch your love handles. You are a sexy human.
This is a tough question. My spouse is also not into this fetish. It hasn't been easy, but we've gotten to a point where he understands that his wife is fat now, but he knows he loves me for me, and he's willing to rub my belly because it's what I need. I personally don't think our weight is something our spouses should control. I don't think your wife should get to say, no you can't gain weight, when it's simply not her decision. She doesn't have to like it, but ideally she understands why youre doing it and can compromise. If you guys can't reach a compromise, if she says she can't stand by and be witness, but you still go for it, you do run the risk of ending the relationship over this. I think you have decide what's worth it for you.
One thing that helped me was reading about what to do if one spouse is into a fetish and the other isn't. If the spouse is able to, I think they should find a way to support their partners. Maybe they can't, if the fetish is BDSM, and they have a history of trauma. That could end the relationship. But exploring one's fetish is very important. I think your spouse should understand our fetishes are part of our sexualities, and our sexualities are part of our identities, and it would not be fair if you're never allowed to take part in your fetish.
Some ways they can support without participating: learning about it or talking about it with you. Or allowing you space to explore it, like time when you can be on the internet engaging with others in the community.
Munchies was right that the answer isn't to gain behind her back. Try to reach an agreement before you gain. If she is never going to be ok with it, if she is going to kink shame you while you're gaining, that's not ok. She has to know you're doing it and why you're doing it, and coexist with it, and you have to hold your end of the bargain.
Also, I hope she's not kink shaming you, that's not ok.
I'm sorry she will not touch your love handles. You are a sexy human.
It is complicated for sure.
I'm of the mind that everyone has the right to bodily autonomy. I don't think someone should have to get permission from their spouse to get fat.
However, the true issue is not the fetish. This disagreement they have with OP's fetish appears to be a proxy to a much larger issue. I don't know if it's something between them or an internal issue that OP's wife hasn't dealt with. But it is very clear to me that the true issue has nothing to do with his fetish at all.
9 months
The new norm?
BromineMoon:
With obesity rates rising worldwide, does anyone else think that fat appreciation will become more commonplace?
With obesity rates rising worldwide, does anyone else think that fat appreciation will become more commonplace?
No
Don't get me wrong. There will always be people who appreciate bigger bodies - even outside of this kink. But the diet industry is extremely profitable.
9 months
Gaining as an escape (fantasy)
CelticBlimp:
Sometimes I think what it would be like being taken by a feeder away from society, far from worries and responsibilities, far from struggle and drama. Just being happy together in a hedonistic life were only love and fattening exists, my body being engorged daily and swollen till only I can see an ocean of fat and my partner perched on top of me and living his dream as well.
Sometimes I think what it would be like being taken by a feeder away from society, far from worries and responsibilities, far from struggle and drama. Just being happy together in a hedonistic life were only love and fattening exists, my body being engorged daily and swollen till only I can see an ocean of fat and my partner perched on top of me and living his dream as well.
I feel this. Sometimes, when life is crazy, I just wanna escape to a fancy hotel somewhere far away. Just me, my partner, and an endless supply of food. I love treating him like a spoiled house pet. Not only is it sexy, but it's soothing. The only thing I have to worry about is our shared pleasure.
I did that once with him for a week. I'd love to do it again. Maybe even for longer.
9 months
The daily shake
BiggerestBelly:
Okay,
Surely after all the time FantasyFeeder has been around and all the time we've had to share and collaborate on gaining...
Surely, someone among us has found the most effective and palatable daily weight gain shake.
Boost? Heavy cream? A particular brand of mass gainer?
What daily supplement or shake recipe has ACTUALLY made a difference for you in your own gains?
Munchies:
Extreme feeder here. I've tried out a number of shakes with the feedees I've had. I don't use them anymore because I find food works so much better. Not only is food more cost effective, but it's easier to fatten up a feedee with delicious food long term. The shakes are better for short-term rapid gains.
BiggerestBelly:
I know regular food is better but I just so love chugging lol
Okay,
Surely after all the time FantasyFeeder has been around and all the time we've had to share and collaborate on gaining...
Surely, someone among us has found the most effective and palatable daily weight gain shake.
Boost? Heavy cream? A particular brand of mass gainer?
What daily supplement or shake recipe has ACTUALLY made a difference for you in your own gains?
Munchies:
Extreme feeder here. I've tried out a number of shakes with the feedees I've had. I don't use them anymore because I find food works so much better. Not only is food more cost effective, but it's easier to fatten up a feedee with delicious food long term. The shakes are better for short-term rapid gains.
BiggerestBelly:
I know regular food is better but I just so love chugging lol
That's fine. But if you love chugging so much, then add some variety in there. Smoothies, juice, fancy coffee. You can even go ham on lots of soup. It's good capacity training, and it will keep you warm on those cold winter nights.
9 months
Fattening in secret
Munchies:
It's not about the fetish. It's about the mentality. And if you don't find a healthy way to approach this situation, your marriage is over.
It's a tale as old as time.
Ninjaturtle94:
How would you suggest we move forward? What could a compromise look like? Or do you think gaining is not really in my cards
Munchies:
It's one of those "It takes two to tango" kinds of things. You both have to be willing to engage with this.
But I'd tackle this in a nonconfrontational way. Wait until you two are just hanging out. Say, "I've been thinking about our conversation about me gaining weight. Your concerns are important to me. However, gaining weight is something that's important to me too. Can we talk about ways for us navigate this?"
Marital counseling and sex therapy may need to be on the table as well.
Invite her to see the kinds of things you enjoy in this community. Show her an insider's perspective instead of an outsider's perspective.
But don't push her. Let her engage with these things at her own speed. Be open and honest with her in all things.
But most of all, be patient. Based on how she reacted, I suspect there's a lot more to this than even she has unpacked.
Ninjaturtle94:
I do feel like maybe she is holding something back. I’m not really sure what it is but I think there may be something else to it. I made sure to tell her I didn’t expect her to engage in it as far as feeding or really have any interest but it was just something I wanted to try
I have asked her before about touching my belly and love handles during sex and just in general and she was not for it and said it was weird and made her uncomfortable. So I figured I could maybe just enjoy this fetish by myself
It's not about the fetish. It's about the mentality. And if you don't find a healthy way to approach this situation, your marriage is over.
It's a tale as old as time.
Ninjaturtle94:
How would you suggest we move forward? What could a compromise look like? Or do you think gaining is not really in my cards
Munchies:
It's one of those "It takes two to tango" kinds of things. You both have to be willing to engage with this.
But I'd tackle this in a nonconfrontational way. Wait until you two are just hanging out. Say, "I've been thinking about our conversation about me gaining weight. Your concerns are important to me. However, gaining weight is something that's important to me too. Can we talk about ways for us navigate this?"
Marital counseling and sex therapy may need to be on the table as well.
Invite her to see the kinds of things you enjoy in this community. Show her an insider's perspective instead of an outsider's perspective.
But don't push her. Let her engage with these things at her own speed. Be open and honest with her in all things.
But most of all, be patient. Based on how she reacted, I suspect there's a lot more to this than even she has unpacked.
Ninjaturtle94:
I do feel like maybe she is holding something back. I’m not really sure what it is but I think there may be something else to it. I made sure to tell her I didn’t expect her to engage in it as far as feeding or really have any interest but it was just something I wanted to try
I have asked her before about touching my belly and love handles during sex and just in general and she was not for it and said it was weird and made her uncomfortable. So I figured I could maybe just enjoy this fetish by myself
Sounds like she has some fatphobia going on. This is a powder keg situation that you have not taken the time to properly appreciate. I would not proceed until you untangle ... whatever this is.
9 months
Fattening in secret
Munchies:
You really don't. There are two major aspects of gaining - physical and mental. Most people focus on the physical, but it's the mental aspect that gets ya.
You are looking to engage in spiteful gaining. That is the most dangerous kind of gaining because it clouds your judgement. You've already shown signs of it too.
You chugged a quart of heavy cream before your wife could throw it away.
You planned on consuming excessive amounts of heavy cream and maltodextrin in secret specifically because your wife doesn't approve.
How long before you start stuffing your face whenever you two start fighting? How long before you start engaging in reckless, rapid gains specifically because it will piss off your wife?
Next thing you know, getting fat is all you'll care about to the detriment of everyone and everything else in your life.
Ninjaturtle94:
I honestly never would have thought that a sexual thrill could turn into something like that. I’m really not looking to piss her off I’ve just wanted to try it for a long time and if I do it and get it over with I can at least have the closure of trying it and then maybe I won’t want to do it again. Then I can just kinda lurk and see other
People do it
Munchies:
It's not about the fetish. It's about the mentality. And if you don't find a healthy way to approach this situation, your marriage is over.
It's a tale as old as time.
Ninjaturtle94:
How would you suggest we move forward? What could a compromise look like? Or do you think gaining is not really in my cards
You really don't. There are two major aspects of gaining - physical and mental. Most people focus on the physical, but it's the mental aspect that gets ya.
You are looking to engage in spiteful gaining. That is the most dangerous kind of gaining because it clouds your judgement. You've already shown signs of it too.
You chugged a quart of heavy cream before your wife could throw it away.
You planned on consuming excessive amounts of heavy cream and maltodextrin in secret specifically because your wife doesn't approve.
How long before you start stuffing your face whenever you two start fighting? How long before you start engaging in reckless, rapid gains specifically because it will piss off your wife?
Next thing you know, getting fat is all you'll care about to the detriment of everyone and everything else in your life.
Ninjaturtle94:
I honestly never would have thought that a sexual thrill could turn into something like that. I’m really not looking to piss her off I’ve just wanted to try it for a long time and if I do it and get it over with I can at least have the closure of trying it and then maybe I won’t want to do it again. Then I can just kinda lurk and see other
People do it
Munchies:
It's not about the fetish. It's about the mentality. And if you don't find a healthy way to approach this situation, your marriage is over.
It's a tale as old as time.
Ninjaturtle94:
How would you suggest we move forward? What could a compromise look like? Or do you think gaining is not really in my cards
It's one of those "It takes two to tango" kinds of things. You both have to be willing to engage with this.
But I'd tackle this in a nonconfrontational way. Wait until you two are just hanging out. Say, "I've been thinking about our conversation about me gaining weight. Your concerns are important to me. However, gaining weight is something that's important to me too. Can we talk about ways for us navigate this?"
Marital counseling and sex therapy may need to be on the table as well.
Invite her to see the kinds of things you enjoy in this community. Show her an insider's perspective instead of an outsider's perspective.
But don't push her. Let her engage with these things at her own speed. Be open and honest with her in all things.
But most of all, be patient. Based on how she reacted, I suspect there's a lot more to this than even she has unpacked.
9 months
