I truly think that my brain shuts off when I get around chips and cookies because I can destroy whole packages of Oreos without even realizing that I ate them and then I want more. I will get full easily off of anything else but my stomach act like it gives a special pass for barbeque chips and Oreos. 🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽

I been stop even bothering to try after I couldn't see past my stomach and now I can't even find my scale so I just let it be. Lol.

This is a truly spot on assessment of how both lifestyles correlate and how each side responds to their particular "fix". I have dated women who were absolutely ravenous about gaining to a particular number so they wouldn't eat during the day so they would binge to the point of eating themselves asleep at night and there was a whole mindlessness about it and I didn't grasp it until recently that for some gaining is a part of their addiction.

It may never be enough for you. I know for some of us it has more to do with our addiction to food and stuffing than with the gain. The gaining is a by product of the addiction. This fat gift of ours has a habit of getting us so caught up in eating that we only notice the gain after our mobility changes for the worse.

Looking back at it, I would go down south with my parents for the summer and I would see how my aunts and cousins were treating their fat spouses and I have never been the type with a chiseled look so having a belly is something that I have always had so even as a child I knew that I was going to either be fatter or completely obese. And after I graduated college and saved up enough money that was when I met an ex and she introduced me to this lifestyle and it was like a match made in pound cakes because we both were overeaters and we didn't have self control so it started from there.

Yeah, those experiences of looking at yourself at the reflections you see feels like an out of body experience because you know that it is you in that reflection but you are just amazed at how you have let yourself go so you become both astounded and excited and you realize that you might just be fat for the rest of your life because it will be too much work to lose it.

WideJuan76:
We will all succumb to it because fatness is what sparks our dopamine so we aren't living in reality now. Some of us has eaten ourselves to the point that our hanging gut droops over or belts

NYCBellyBlimp:
There are different levels to that reality though. Blocking others out, separating yourself. Looking for that 2nd/3rd opinion to switch off to as your long lasting MD opted to get too personal or make things uncomfortable.
The ER doctor telling you about Laurel outliving Hardy but rather being fulfilled having the ride-share stop at Popeyes afterwards to block it out.[/quote]

I totally concur. We have amazing powers to self delude ourselves and this is no different. We will scour the web to find obese positive doctors and will gorge down later to fortify why our obesity is who we are.

I on the other hand, have always had like flabby moobs to the point that I was always self conscious about them and would wear two shirts to hide them but the fat I gained was subcutaneous fat and I didn't even realize the foods my ex was giving me gave me the real jiggly fat and I was always around the mid 200's but mine didn't hang until my 320's but now they are link with my side fat to have moobs that go under my armpit so I say keep eating and so what happens.

WideJuan76:
I think that I have had those but I typically had episodes in which I think my brain went to its default settings and I went damn near weeks not being aware of how much exes were cooking and I would get stoned so much back then that I forgot that I ate a whole pan of lasagna so I have had twilight zone fat wake up realizations.

NYCBellyBlimp:
Definitely got "Mother" Twilight Zone vibes from that 1.[/quote]

And that is what it feels like. Almost like the trance you get from those alien abduction people

WideJuan76:
I am willing to control the switch because I literally saw what my future was going to be because I had not calculated what being superobese was going to be like until I met my ex's friends who had spouses who were beyond me and those men couldn't do much of anything other than gorge and that terrified me because they literally gave into their fatness so all they cared about was food and their next meal..

NYCBellyBlimp:
Definitely challenging to fight that free fall when the last chain to keep you bonded to reality offline starts to break.[/quote]

We will all succumb to it because fatness is what sparks our dopamine so we aren't living in reality now. Some of us has eaten ourselves to the point that our hanging gut droops over or belts