lol, the first year i heard of this, i said to my partner em, "it's... kind of an awkward name, isn't it?"

whatever - trans people are just people, and as that famous roman philosopher once said, "love 'em all, and let cupid sort them out"

i want to recognize that today is the international transgender day of visibility.

to all of the trans members of ff, i want to let you know that i see you and support you!

to my beautiful partner; i love you, respect you, and admire you for all that you are and all that you do.

is there any reason to believe there are more chapters? or did the author not complete the story (not yet, at least)?

i really struggled at first, i think it was because my fatter, flabbier body was clashing with the mental image i had of myself as a lean, athletic guy. a couple of times i freaked out a little and rushed back to the gym. but the path back was just too hard.

it took me probably a year for my mental image to shift to match where my physical self was heading.

this is a great topic.

i think because a lot of people come to websites like for the fetish aspect they hyper-fixate on the goal - get bigger, faster, now! as a younger, fit feeder, i may have been a bit like that, tbh.

my entry into gaining didn't happen until i hit 40, and it was completely by accident (and at times, a little reluctant), and it was all because i had a partner (now an ex) that helped me enjoy the ride.

she was very large, but with no connection or interest to feedism or gaining. but she *loved* food! she was a true foodie. we went out to eat (and drink) - a lot - and she knew the area much better than i did so i just kind of followed her lead. and she introduced me to a lot of different foods, and kind of taught me how to really enjoy food. flavours, textures, pairing different wine, beer and booze with particular food. it was a wonderful experience in indulgence, and it really did change me.

we were together for a few years before the pandemic, and i stopped going to the gym (mostly due to hangovers, lol) and started to pile on weight... by the time we broke up i was officially fat. i even tried to go back to the gym a few times to "get back in shape" but i was too far gone, and my ego back then couldn't take being "the fat guy" at the gym.

we broke up amicably when i had to move for work... then the pandemic hit and i got really fat, just eating out of habit and lack of anything else to do!

every now and then i will use the search function to see if a topic has come up in the past (it's great that there is such a long history to this forum, btw!). i may have necroposted in the past because i wanted to comment directly in relation to the thread already posted.

but usually, for the reasons described already, i would opt to start a fresh thread... the link to the past would have to be very specific, very niche, and completely pertinent to whatever i wanted to talk about.

that's why it is good to quote the post when you respond - the original post will disappear when a fly-by-night user deletes their account, but the quote will stay.

oh, i truly adore this lifestyle! i loved those years of not spending time in the gym, of eating and drinking and indulging to my heart's content - once i got past that initial uncertainty, i really enjoyed myself.

discovering the delights of food, all the flavours, aromas and textures... experiencing the disabling delight of being truly stuffed... i loved every minute, and i miss it now.

there is something wonderful about feeling big, feeling heavy, too. the reduction in flexibility, speed and endurance is sometimes more difficult to adjust to - but even those can be fun, in the right circumstances with the right partner!

i am still enjoying my fatness, even if i am not able to participate with wild abandon like i used to. i will never be thin again, i am quite certain!

i would agree with this theory, having been thru a similar experience.

i started gaining when i was with a fat partner. i'd been athletic my whole life, and it was the first time i kind of gave myself permission to "let go." when i was with my partner, enjoying our life together, it was amazing... but it was in those other moments when the realization was much harder to deal with.

after putting on 50 lbs i panicked a little and rushed back to the gym with an idea of getting back in shape, and that is when the reality of getting fat and out of shape really hit me. i was a (large) shadow of my former self in the gym!

that happened a few times during my that initial year of gaining. as time went on i think i kind of eased into being a fat (and growing) guy, and that conflict with my self-image as a buff, fit guy sort of died away.

now, several years later, and three times my original size, i look at it like a different life - almost a different person! and that is kind of cool, too, getting to live more than one life in a single lifetime.

like @frogman i am no longer trying to gain, and i should actually lose some weight, but i will never go back to being a thin guy or average sized.

hmmm, is that a new kink being unlocked that i'm sensing?....?