Fantasy Feeder

A kink you have that you bet no one else has?

I'm pretty sure this is going to be a unique one. I'm short, but I've always been obsessed with how much my belly and midsection expands when I sit down and have nowhere to go but out. I'm already practically round when I stand. When I sit, I almost look like an oval on its side. The difference between my standing waist and sitting waist, as big as I am, is nearly 2 ft.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Weight gain and cholesterol

Art Tool:
Hi There,

Im asking on behalf of my girlfriend, is it possible to gain weight in a 'healthy way' that doesnt impact your cholesterol or blood pressure too negatively and if so what would be the best foods/ways of doing this be?

To give you the full picture. I came out to my partner that I was into this kink about 7 months ago. To my delight she shared my interest in it and feeding has been a feature of the relationship since. She has gained some weight and is now around 220lb (we dont know exactly), is 5'6" and 23 years old. She had a doctors appointment concerning her thyroid last week and after a call back they said that she had some health issues including high cholesterol, obesity and a thyroid that will require medication. She has been told to diet and there is a long list of foods she isnt allowed to eat which includes dairy, sugar, rice, tofu, watermelon, pretty much anything fun.

We both feel bummed out by this and I think it has been abit of a reality check. Obviously this kink is innately unhealthy but having a doctor put it in black and white like this isnt much fun. We would like to keep the feeding and ideally keep gaining weight but that seems at odds with what the doctor is asking and with long term health.

What are other peoples relationships like with feeding and long term health? Is it a concern? Do people ignore it? Are there any work arounds available? Any help would be appreciated, thank you.

You're thinking with your head instead of your hormones, and I love that. Kudos to you.

I do believe there is a safer, albeit slower way to gain that involves maintaining physical activity and healthier food choices. I didn't choose the healthier path, and not to say I have regrets, but there are definitely consequences. You two are thinking about it at the right time rather than 100 pounds down the road. The earlier you are on the journey, the easier it is to change trains and still reach your ultimate destination.

I'm afraid there are no hacks unfortunately. Your path forward is probably going to be bigger quantities or more frequent meals that include lean proteins, healthy fats, and a good portion of green things. She can absolutely indulge, and if stuffing is an interest, it can also be worked in as a periodic treat. Be careful about not making it a daily thing though. A massive appetite and stretched stomach are verrrry hard to reverse. Take it from a 650 pound woman who fights cravings daily, despite health issues.

Final piece of advice-- she needs a doctor she trusts, not one who shames her or pushes her to lose weight as the end-all be-all. No doctor is going to give an outright blessing to obesity, but you do want someone who respects her as a person.

Very best of luck to the two of you.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Outgrowing everything!

Johnxyz:
That is what stretchy clothes, muumuus, and tunic tops are for. Also try maternity clothes, until your arms and legs are too fat to fit.

Extra points when your belly gets so big, maternity tops are tight on it!

I busted a seam in maternity leggings once after very rapidly gaining 80 pounds. I was quite proud of myself.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

A kink you have that you bet no one else has?

Wearing a pattern (stripes, flowers, geometric shapes, etc.) that is distorted across my belly because my clothing is so stretched out over my gut.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Crushing doctor's office experience

BigBallBellyGirl:
I need to find a new cardiologist. I didn't exactly handpick mine. I had a medical emergency 13 months ago, and she performed my emergency triple bypass. At the time, I was over 600 pounds. Following the surgery, I was able to get down to 555 - 560, but no matter what I did, I couldn't keep the weight off. I settled around 585 for a while. Last December, I got married, and I did indulge on my honeymoon, although I only had one true stuffing. By New Years, I was back at 600. I decided I was going to focus on clean eating (lean proteins, vegetables, salads, lots of water) and activity to the extent that I'm capable of it. I've stayed on the bandwagon (until today) with the occasional treat a time or two a week (and by that I mean a piece of pie, not the whole thing). I also stay within maintenance calories.

Nevertheless, I'm gaining weight. I have a very large girth, well over 100 inches around standing. That limits my mobility in the extreme, and I can't stand for long without my walker. My husband helps me d sitting exercises every day, but I just don't have a big range of motion. I'm about 646 at the moment. I don't have lymphedema... I'm just... FAT.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not unhappy with my size. I actually like my appearance. But I know I have to control my weight, or I could easily be unable to leave the house in a year, maybe less. I definitely don't want that.

My last appointment with my cardiologist was in January, and I was about 600 pounds then. She doesn't have a scale that can accommodate me, so they asked me to estimate my weight. I know exactly what I weigh, and I was honest. She commented on my weight gain before asking anything else. She didn't ask how I was feeling, about my breathing, about my control over my diabetes. She went straight for extra weight and reacted as though I was 200 pounds heavier, not 40-something. Even worse, when I told her what I eat in a day, she refused to believe me. My eyes were stinging with tears the whole time, because I know the truth. I'm not a liar. Otherwise, I would have put 600 down as my weight and not admitted I'm heavier. I quickly got around to refills of my medications, and left. I'll also add, my glucose was 125 and my BP was 140/100, which Is high but pretty reasonable for someone who is super obese, so no alarming indicators based on my actual health.

This evening, I spiraled. Despite my sweet husband trying to distract me, I ordered 5 Big Macs with extra cheese, 2 Crispy Chicken sandwiches, 2 fish sandwiches, 40 chicken nuggets, a milkshake, and a large Coke. I ate all of it, and I felt nauseated, I think because I'm no longer used to eating greasy and fatty foods or consuming so much sodium. It's also unlike me to eat out of sadness. When I was gaining, stuffing was always a happy and festive occasion.

My husband is encouraging me not to guilt myself and reminding me we can reset. And I'm going to ask my primary care doctor for a referral to someone new. I just wish medical professionals didn't take such delight in admonishing, and I wish she had believed me when I told her the truth.

Munchies:
It sucks when medical providers have shit bedside manner. How you treat your patients greatly impacts their care. It would have been more helpful to get to the root of the issue and not berate you.

I'm sorry, love. You do not deserve that.

Thank you so much. I take your words of encouragement and empathy to heart.

She seemed as though she was personally offended I gained weight, as though I had done something to her. Furthermore, I clammed up because of her response, so if I actually was dealing with a major medical problem, she would never have known it.

My primary care physician and endocrinologist aren't like that at all. They don't pretend being over 600 pounds, strictly medically speaking, is in the best interest of someone's health, but they also don't hyperfixate or act like being fat is a moral failing. My primary doc also doesn't pin any concerns I have immediately on my weight. I feel like this cardiologist would blame an earache on my size.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Crushing doctor's office experience

I need to find a new cardiologist. I didn't exactly handpick mine. I had a medical emergency 13 months ago, and she performed my emergency triple bypass. At the time, I was over 600 pounds. Following the surgery, I was able to get down to 555 - 560, but no matter what I did, I couldn't keep the weight off. I settled around 585 for a while. Last December, I got married, and I did indulge on my honeymoon, although I only had one true stuffing. By New Years, I was back at 600. I decided I was going to focus on clean eating (lean proteins, vegetables, salads, lots of water) and activity to the extent that I'm capable of it. I've stayed on the bandwagon (until today) with the occasional treat a time or two a week (and by that I mean a piece of pie, not the whole thing). I also stay within maintenance calories.

Nevertheless, I'm gaining weight. I have a very large girth, well over 100 inches around standing. That limits my mobility in the extreme, and I can't stand for long without my walker. My husband helps me d sitting exercises every day, but I just don't have a big range of motion. I'm about 646 at the moment. I don't have lymphedema... I'm just... FAT.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not unhappy with my size. I actually like my appearance. But I know I have to control my weight, or I could easily be unable to leave the house in a year, maybe less. I definitely don't want that.

My last appointment with my cardiologist was in January, and I was about 600 pounds then. She doesn't have a scale that can accommodate me, so they asked me to estimate my weight. I know exactly what I weigh, and I was honest. She commented on my weight gain before asking anything else. She didn't ask how I was feeling, about my breathing, about my control over my diabetes. She went straight for extra weight and reacted as though I was 200 pounds heavier, not 40-something. Even worse, when I told her what I eat in a day, she refused to believe me. My eyes were stinging with tears the whole time, because I know the truth. I'm not a liar. Otherwise, I would have put 600 down as my weight and not admitted I'm heavier. I quickly got around to refills of my medications, and left. I'll also add, my glucose was 125 and my BP was 140/100, which Is high but pretty reasonable for someone who is super obese, so no alarming indicators based on my actual health.

This evening, I spiraled. Despite my sweet husband trying to distract me, I ordered 5 Big Macs with extra cheese, 2 Crispy Chicken sandwiches, 2 fish sandwiches, 40 chicken nuggets, a milkshake, and a large Coke. I ate all of it, and I felt nauseated, I think because I'm no longer used to eating greasy and fatty foods or consuming so much sodium. It's also unlike me to eat out of sadness. When I was gaining, stuffing was always a happy and festive occasion.

My husband is encouraging me not to guilt myself and reminding me we can reset. And I'm going to ask my primary care doctor for a referral to someone new. I just wish medical professionals didn't take such delight in admonishing, and I wish she had believed me when I told her the truth.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

What's your earliest memory?

As a very small child, I already had a pot belly, and I remember pushing it out to make it even bigger. I often laid in bed secretly pretending I was very very fat and fantasizing about eating large quantities. I think it's likely some early media inspired some of these fantasies, or maybe it was my mother's fixation on thinness and diet culture. She often would describe certain foods as good or bad, and she focused heavily on losing 5 or 10 lb for special occasions. Somehow, the reverse thought pattern took root in my brain. If restricting food made her as thin as she wanted to be, then eating a lot would make me as fat as I wanted to be. It's no surprise that I'm now a 600 plus pounder, given how long this has been taking up residence in my head..

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Overstuffing/overeating

There's no feeling like drifting off to sleep with your belly completely full, swollen, and heavy.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

Pro tip

Bubbingscrubbles:
A good hot shower, a stretch, and a heating pad makes you reeeeeal stretchy and minimizes cramps! It’s absolutely unreal

A few years back, I ate a whole large stuffed crust pizza, a ton of bread sticks, and a party platter of boneless wings. Then, my now-husband fed me a whole cheesecake and helped me into a hot tub. As my muscles relaxed, my belly swelled up and the pressure inside doubled. It was delightful. I continued stuffing after getting out.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl

How did you overcome your fears and concerns? advice for new feedee

CrazyCoconut:
Hi All.

When you first decided to start gaining and getting huge, how did you overcome your fears and concerns about getting huge? I'm just starting my gaining journey, hoping to become bedbound and spend the rest of my days eating. I'm struggling with completely letting go due to fears of being so huge, the obvious health issues that come with it, how family and friends and coworkers react to my increasing size. I'm also by myself so I have fears of becoming immobile alone.

How did you overcome those fears when you first started actively gaining? Especially as you got bigger?

Not sure how much you want to gain or how big you want to be. I've always been fat, so in my case, it more a question of whether I wanted to be supersized (which I am). I overcame those concerns by planning for logistical issues. We bought a different vehicle; we took the glass shower doors out of our bathroom; I saved money to buy larger clothes while I was actively gaining. I'm also constantly reevaluating what concessions I'm willing to make and what limitations I'm okay with. I think at the moment, I may have more limitations than I want. They seemed to pile on after 600 pounds. Fortunately, I have a husband who's supportive and helpful if I decide a little weight loss is necessary for me to fully participate in life.

1 month

BigBallBellyGirl