I never noticed it was a fetish until I was 17 and a friend pointed out that my gf at the time was almost as wide as she was tall and that all we ever did for joint dates was go for dinner then for ice cream.

Date: yes, Marry: most definitely.

Outside of the bedroom, there are loads of perks.

In the long run, being with a partner who is indulgent is a real plus. If you're lucky enough to be able to travel and go on dates, adding in an enjoyable meal or snack is something that is a lot easier with a less diet focused woman.

There are very few cultures that are not proud of their cuisine and when making new friends it is a lot easier when there is a base common interest which is often a meal.

Having dated a lot of smaller more diet focused women, I can tell you it is a lot harder to socialise. There's nothing worse than meeting a new business partner and his wife and having your S/O turn down all hospitality due to her diet.

Making someone gain is a different thing. Not discouraging them from it when they clearly aren't against it is fine, but if theres a hard No despite you being honest, then I see that as an incompatibility.

"I also cant fantasize about sex and get turned on."
I missed this and I do see your point. It would be a good exercise for the OP to ask himself some questions and yes indeed, until the point of being of having had the option of real.life sexual experience and possibly executed that option, it is impossible to know as all other experiences can be thought of as a facsimile whether imagination or visual access to erotic stimuli.

That's simply not true. Asexuals can be turned on by all those things, they just don't have any innate drive to have sex. For example, someone writing about someone getting fatter can turn me on.



If not including grey asexuality, then by the definition of psychological asexuality he does not by his description demonstrate sufficient trait to be defined as wholly asexual and under definition should not be categorized as such.

Understanding that psychological terminology is not always how terms relating to sexuality are used inmodern online parlance, I assume that you are implying that he may wish to explore the idea of being in the grey scale.

This isn't a bad thing, but again given his wish to have sexual relations and that he simply doesn't enjoy graphical pornography, I fail to see the evidence for your response. Please elaborate if you have time.

For many people, until the physical association has been made, or you've actually had the experience, visual stimulation will have minimal effect.

Consider any other dopamine ramping activity like say extreme sports. Watching a ski or downhill biking or skate video triggers memories of the interactive process and hence affects your mood far more if you have had a similar experience to the activity being viewed.

The same is true for war films.

Before a tour of duty, and particularly if that tour saw a fire fight, you will have a very different reaction to the fire fight scenes in screen to just the normal ramp in adrenaline from a person without closer associative memories of similar events.

How do you respond to reading erotica?

If your own imagination of erotic moments bring arousal and further to that, stimulated visualisation by reading and imagining erotic moments cause you to be aroused, then it is unlikely that you are asexual.

Porn was not and is still not a massive thing for me unless it matches experiences I've had. However erotic literature or erotic real life experiences have a normal effect.

The not eating until later in the day is anecdotal. The majority of data suggests that people hanging weight tend to eat a lot at any time.

If you're trying to slow your metabolism you would need to go a prolonged number of days on a highly calorie restricted diet which can have health risks if not done correctly.

Far better to eat often and keep eating lots that way you can ensure you have a high enough calorie intake so.your body has something to store.

Also consider cycling your diet patterns if you plateau.

As far as I'm aware, anything above a 4xl is usually a custom. To echo the previous comment, get on Etsy find a maker and ask them. I know I've seen stuff out there on people above a 4X but from the only designer I've met who worked in latex and vinyl, it's often a similar price to make to order as there's little point keeping stock.

This seems to be one of those costs of gaining that a lot of people don't consider.
There's always the food and the wardrobe but rarely the car and the bed that cross your mind.

Even having just crested 200lbs today my wife now finds our old matress less comfortable. This is partly due to its softness and partially due to her change in shape which means her habitual sleeping positions from a few years ago are really working these days.

If you're continuing to gain, try finding new positions and using pillows for support until you've saved for a matress which you should really spend some proper time researching and trying in stores before buying.

If going big big, consider that frame choice and size of matress are very important too.

I'd start with the idea that there's a lot of societal pressure to deal with.

Before I got married I dated people of various sizes and have never found anyone that didn't try to adhere to some kind of published normality.

This was very evident in the early 2000 where in the peak of hip-hop popular culture "curvy"was published as favorable for a period of about 18months where my gf at the time really embraced her curves for that period but quickly fell out of love with the idea as fashion changed.

As a silver lining the most successful time I've had is with my now wife who had been about 210lbs before I met her but had over 5 years lost an obscene amount of weight and was around 110lbs when we met.

When she noted the size of a few of my ex's I was open and honest about my preferences and gradually over 7 years she has began to be more comfortable with her natural habits and body. Today she's just shy of 200lbs and seems to find herself very confident in her skin (more so than when we met), though again she still has a lot of pressure from friends and work colleagues over it.

I've noted that more people within our friend set that are of similar habits and sizes to her, the less the comments from more distant acquaintances seem to come up in conversation.

When we're in London she has a couple of friends who really like to eat and talk about food as part of the social interaction rather than generic pop culture etc. After a few outings with these friends she really embraces her impulses and that relaxation in to herself seems to extend to all aspects of her behavior from her work to our home life: she becomes charged and positive and very productive.

As a take away, and only from this one currently successful relationship I would say that tuning your social set to one with more similarities in terms of size acceptance may help you in the future, but again this is only anecdotal as all my previous relationships with larger people have not had the same success.

English, Spanish, French, Hebrew, then a smattering of Arabic (darujah and fassaha), Russian, Cantonese and Lithuanian. I took Japanese for business some 20 years ago but could broker a deal in it any more (I can just about order a meal and ask for directions).

It's funny how one can lose skills over time.