I was well on my way to immobility last year, when I was gaining at an incredibly high pace. Had I not put the brakes on, I have no doubt I would be bed bound now. My fiance (We weren't engaged yet then) and I discussed it at length, and neither one of us were ready. Honestly, we probably will never go down that path, because we know how dramatically our relationship would change. I trust this man with my whole heart, but I can't imagine a scenario in which even the most loving and dedicated partner wouldn't have flashes of frustration caring for someone around the clock. It is normal, because of the stress involved, and frankly, some of the complications that can come from being unable to leave bed. Even as someone who can still walk, I'm big enough I need his help for some things already. Also, there are sooo many aspects of life we would miss. Today, we had brunch at a very nice restaurant. This summer, we are going to his parents' vacation home on the Great Lakes. And... we're planning a honeymoon. We just don't want our world to get so small it's confined to one room.
9 months
Today was the once a month complete gluttony session I allow myself to satisfy my desire to stuff, and it was such a lovely sensation to completely pack my gut with anything and everything.
The fun started with a lunch outing and continued at home. I think I tracked everything...
Lunch (~2,800 cal.)
- Entree cranberry, walnut, and blue cheese salad
- Jumbo lump crab cakes on toasted English muffins with Hollandaise sauce
- Asparagus
- Pomme fries with truffled mayo
- 1 Mimosa
- Turtle cheesecake
Afternoon snacks (~6,200 cal)
- 1 pint of Oreo ice cream
- 4 pieces of string cheese
- Celery, carrots, and southwest ranch dip
- 2 Spinach and cheese stuffed croissants
- 2 Totinos pizzas
- 2 green apples, sliced and dipped in peanut butter
- 1 large bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos
- 2 cans of Mt. Dew
Dinner (Double DoorDash) (~5,800 cal)
- 4 chicken tinga quesadillas
- 2 five-layer burritos
- 3 soft taco supremes
- Large Pepsi
- 2 Impossible Whoppers with Cheese
- Fish sandwiches
- 1 beer
Dessert (~950 ca)
- Large slice of Chocolate molten lava cake
- 2 glasses of milk
Snack (~320 cal)
- 1 lb. grapes
- Strawberries
- Cucumbers dipped in cream cheese
Total: 16,320 cal.
Morning weigh-in: 327
Night weigh-in: 338
Sitting here on the sofa, I'm very very full, and my belly is notably bulging even more than it usually does, especially out to the side. I didn't quite hit the magnitude I used to reach when I was actively gaining, but I'm still pretty happy with myself!!
9 months
Morbidly A Beast:
Content Creators are Toxic for the parasocial aspect it sends mixed signals to people who probably don’t know better, but it really isn’t the creators fault but like it isn’t said enough I feel like. But I also think sex work is real work. Big brain.
BigBallBellyGirl:
Agreed! I'd say that content creation is absolutely valid entrepreneurship, and I certainly respect people who are able to make it profitable. I think the danger is when people assume everyone on the site wants to put out content and is somehow not participating appropriately in the community if they are not doing so. As fat people, we don't exist for others' gratification. We exist as whole humans, all by ourselves, with the right to be active here and in any other space we choose in whatever way we choose.
Enas:
I think people, especially in America but in other places too, are much more selfish and much more... stupid, than that (i have a theory of stupidity but its gonna be too much to write it here), and i mean that litteraly. Not to offend, these are just the words that describe what im trying to say. From their point of view they see they cant find a partner the way they expect or desire to. They then indentify this as a problem. Instantly, the ideological narative of individualism kicks in and puts it as "Its either my fault or their fault" which might already be false, and of course entitled people almost always automatically assume that "its not my fault" without ever giving it proper thought. And then they are angry at other individuals, like being mad at someone will fix any problem.
Also, one question i have about what you write, what is "valid enterprenuership"? Is there a kind of enterprenuership that is not valid?
That's a good question, and honestly, I'm not entirely sure how to answer that. I think I'm pushing back against misconceptions that visual content creation somehow makes a person less authentic because they're "in it for the money". My point was that I applaud people who are able to monetize. It's just not what all overweight people on these sites are looking for.
I wasn't quite able to fully close the loop on that thought, but I hope that makes some sense.
9 months
BigBallBellyGirl:
We recently went back to my college town and ate at my favorite buffet. They now have a three plate limit, not including salad and dessert. I was very disappointed. I used to pile up seven or eight plates and eat to my belly's content. 😭
Finish8000:
To be fair, though, how often does anyone get to say they're the reason a buffet had to put a limit on plates because they were cleaning the place dry? I think you should consider that a major accomplishment.
Hahaha! I'd like to think I at least factored into the change in policy!
9 months
Current BMI is 93.7. I'm a bit of a chunk.
9 months
Morbidly A Beast:
Content Creators are Toxic for the parasocial aspect it sends mixed signals to people who probably don’t know better, but it really isn’t the creators fault but like it isn’t said enough I feel like. But I also think sex work is real work. Big brain.
Agreed! I'd say that content creation is absolutely valid entrepreneurship, and I certainly respect people who are able to make it profitable. I think the danger is when people assume everyone on the site wants to put out content and is somehow not participating appropriately in the community if they are not doing so. As fat people, we don't exist for others' gratification. We exist as whole humans, all by ourselves, with the right to be active here and in any other space we choose in whatever way we choose.
9 months
BigBallBellyGirl:
I mean... He's not wrong. Between Nov. 2022 and Dec. 2023, I went from 290 to 490, and my belly went from 58 inches to 93 inches because I was shoveling in pounds of hamburgers, chicken tenders, fries, pizza, bread, chips, pasta, and cheese everyday. That not only led to a big pot belly, but to a huge layer of hard visceral fat.
Nofbar:
Ack! You're making me jealous of you blowing up so big so quickly.
And I have zero regrets! If my body could handle 100 more pounds, I would do it in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, I had to put the brakes on after I hit 500 to 525.
9 months
LeFerrellV:
My fiancee goes on my case about eating my food fast. I just can't help it. It's like my mind turns off when I eat. I do get indigestion from it but the idea of mindless eating is really erotic. Does anybody else have this issue.
BigBallBellyGirl:
I have a friend who teaches middle school. Lunch periods are 40 minutes. That time includes lining the students up to walk to the lunchroom, standing beside her class in the lunch line, and waiting at her designated spot for them to line back up when finished. As a result, teachers end up wolfing down food quickly. She realized, as she unintentionally gained about 20 pounds (unwanted, in her case), she was eating everything quickly and would often be overly full before her brain and stomach connected to realize it. One of her weight loss strategies was to slow down and eat mindfully.
I don't want to lose weight, but when I did decide to more or less maintain, I started doing the same thing. As a stuffer, I'm accustomed to putting away a whole large pizza in 15 minutes. I've had to step back and learn to taste my food instead of packing it in as fast as possible. Granted, I still eat a lot. My maintenance calories at my size are about 4,500 a day. But eating more slowly has helped me cut back to that, from 10,000 to 20,000 as my norm.
I said that all to say, what you've read is definitely true. Take it from a long time power stuffer
LeFerrellV:
10,000 to 20,000 Wow!!! I like to stuff from time to time. I think that's why I eat fast because I have probably learn to turn my mind off when I eat. I don't want to lose weight either. I get stomach indigestion sometimes, especially from eating pizza, and I absolutely love pizza. I wish that I had the money or resources to consume 10,000 to 20,000 calories a day. It is hard for me to consume 4500 calories a day. I wish that I could be mindless to a lot of things sometimes.
Pizza is delicious -- but I know some folks pay for eating large quantities of it with indigestion! For some reason, I have an ironclad digestive system. In spite of everything I have packed in my belly over the years, I can't really recall a time when I had heartburn. Other issues, yes, but not heartburn.
9 months
Aliaspace10:
Hello
I have always been chubby and I have self-consciousness until now, I have tried all the diets to lose weight since I was very little, today I accept and I love my fat and flabby body. would like to gain even more weight but I'm afraid that my family and friends will comment and put me on a diet (this has already happened) How I could gain weight without them noticing?
Munchies:
Friendly reminder that you are 18 now. They can't make you do anything.
Aliaspace10:
But I still live with my parents
Munchies:
Still an adult. And as such, they have no legal right to your bodily autonomy.
That said, I highly recommend securing income so you can buy your own food if possible. That way, they can't harp on you for eating up all their food.
Echo this... Part time job, freelancing, Up work... It *IS* reasonable that you expect to contribute to expenses you incur. It is *NOT* someone else's right to demand your body look a certain way.
That said, I do understand. And realistically, it is a balance. What do you find exciting and hot? What do you find reasonable for your daily life and budget? How much judgment are you willing to tolerate? Are you ready to face it? Know wherever you are in your journey is okay.
But if you are ready to take the leap, good for you. Your body only belongs to you, even if you find the love of your life. Wishing you the very best.
9 months
We recently went back to my college town and ate at my favorite buffet. They now have a three plate limit, not including salad and dessert. I was very disappointed. I used to pile up seven or eight plates and eat to my belly's content. 😭
9 months
