So glad you waited 6 months to come back and hit us with this nugget of sardonic ennui.

Welcome back

I have mixed feelings. I had wondered if some of my friends who don't know about my fetish/preferences might see it and I could then talk about it with them. But because of the shock-value parts I think it's more likely to make them think I'm a freak than someone who just happens to have a particular niche interest that maybe they hadn't heard about before. They'd probably immediately make the assumption that I'm going to end up immobile and unhappy, or that I am only doing it because that's what the men in my life want me to do.

There seemed to be a lot of reference to the fact that a lot of the fans of these women wanted them to get bigger. The implication, especially in the voice-over for Patty, was that she was getting bigger primarily for that reason, and not because she personally wanted it or enjoyed it. It was more balanced when interviewing Kitt and Reenaye though as they made it clear it was part of their sexuality and what they wanted.

I agree with some of the posters above that it would be refreshing to see a documentary focussing on more regular people who have either come to terms with and enjoy being fat despite society's pressures, or with people who do have a fat/wg/belly fetish but aren't making money from it or pushing it to extremes. However I imagine most of us who fall into those categories would be wary of appearing on television for our gran/employer/more "straightlaced" friends to see...

I enjoyed the start to the programme though. I thought Lizzie, the gorgeous blonde from Leeds, was a terrific advert for how bigger girls can be sassy, fashionable, beautifully made up and impeccably dressed, and someone who I'm sure a huge percentage of the male viewers would love to have on their arm on a night out, whether they were FAs or not.

Reenaye and Kitt's boyfriends were portrayed well I thought. I was worried beforehand that any partners or admirers in the show would be spun as creepy, controlling types with no regard for the woman's wellbeing.

And what's with all the fast-food eating they filmed? We fatties CAN eat normal healthy food as well you know! Like, just more of it!!

The lower level of inhibition when talking to people online does enable me to be more honest about the subject matters on this site though. It means I can confront issues that I had previously been far too shy and mortified to discuss, to the point where occasionally I can actually have a conversation with someone like-minded in real life too.

I think we should all wear a medal or a badge commemorating our achievement! I'd like to thank my agent, my local bakery and takeaway outlets for enabling me to spend so much time talking what was inevitably... drivel haha

This site provides me with many happy hours of amusement, thanks Hiccupx!

I'm similar to your gf. I call it recklessness - that grey no-man's land between accidental and deliberate. You realise there's a risk you'll gain weight if you eat that cake (and the next, and the next, and then "forget" to go to the gym) but you go ahead and eat it anyway, even though you can foresee the consequences.

I had this problem even before I realised I had a fat fetish and my appreciation of my own size and shape was fully in the closet and buried in my subconscious. I've never successfully been able to lose weight permanently.

So why don't people like me and your gf diet and lose weight if that's what we want to do?

I think it's about conditioning and expectations. Some people are mortified if they gain weight, embarrassed and have concerns about health issues or appearance that they are able to act on. I don't have such a highly developed level of concern because I've always been at least chubby, and my whole family is too. If you come from a thin family, you're more likely to react adversely to a gain than someone already chubby who has chubby people around them.

And once a girl becomes fat, a little more weight isn't such a big deal, right? Once you're chubby, a little more chub doesn't make that big a difference. Society seems to classify people into fat and non-fat. So it sometimes seems as if it doesn't matter if you're 11 stone or 31 stone, the point is you're not 8 stone and thin. That's a difficult mental block to shift if you're brought up in our society.

As for expectations, I watched my mother fail diets all through her life. She most definitely didn't fail them because she had a fat fetish. So I have had it blueprinted on my mind that it is inevitable that I, like her, will gain weight throughout my adult years. Of course it's not inevitable - I am not my mother and I can make my own choices. But it's the same as we see in other areas of society (eg. people who commit crime, or people who come from multi-generational dependence on benefits) - if you are labelled, or label yourself because of deep-seated long-held beliefs and expectations, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. I believe that it is unlikely I will be able to lose weight, and so this is what actually comes to pass, because the mind is a powerful thing. I have been conditioned to allow it to happen.

Add to that a now-discovered fascination with my own belly, a bit of a gaining fetish and a kinky streak that likes fat-girl humiliation, and you can imagine it would be hard for me successfully to lose weight.

That's my explanation for how my situation comes to be - not sure if that has any resonance for your gf's state of mind?

I need London to have one of these! I'm totally becoming a member!



Totally agree with this, feeder_f. If I don't respond, surely that's better than my sending you a message outlining all the ways in which you fail?

Bear in mind that if someone doesn't reply it's probably because you don't meet a truly random set of criteria which are set by that one person. It doesn't mean you suck. Horses for courses and all that.

Someone whose BIRTHDAY IT IS TODAY!!!!

Happy birthday!!

Hope you have a great one.

My gran (aged 92) has been all over the world as all her life she was truly intrepid. She's my heroine . So I asked where she would most like to visit that she hadn't yet seen. She said she'd go and see the wild horses of the Camargue. So yeah, that's what I'd like to do this summer. I'll take photos for her.