Sound advice SugarBaby. You have the voice of reason and experience.

I personally know two girls that each gave up a baby in their teenage years, to a family that could provide a better life then they could at that time. They are both +/- 30 yrs of age now, and still in loose contact with the parents and can look back with full confidence they did the right thing for the child at the time. It's difficult to do though.

HippoFeeder: Obvoiusly you didn't expect to be in this situation. This is a life altering event for you. Hopefully by now your Safty and security situation is resolved and you can focus on your future. You have a bit of time. Consider your options from both emotional and logical view point. Think long term as well. Lots of single moms out there. It's a difficult and challenging life. That doesn't mean you should avoid it, if you feel good about keeping it.

Be careful if Mr Knucklehead wants to reconcile too. Good luck to you in this situation. Please update us when you can. :-)

Probably any or all of those plus genetics and I think also nutrition and overall health of the skin. If one is deficient in certain vitamins or minerals that are used or needed by the skin, there has to be some kind of effect, but age and genetics and even how the weight is gained and where it goes may all play a role.

If the fat is behind the abdominal wall, the belly is probably more solid and round. If the fat is between the wall and the skin, that's probably more shaped by gravity and the persons clothing. I do think some people wear clothing that alters their natural shape.

I'm happy for you two, and any others who have had that good fortune. I have no expectations of meeting anyone to date here although that would be insanely awesome if it happened.

I once had a girl tell me that she liked how I was a nerd and a geek (both good she said) but not a nerdy geek (which would be bad) LOL

Official I live in AZ but I drive professionally, so I'm all over North America.

Always up for chatting though :-)

Yep, me two... Dance, Techno and other "electronica" :-)

I enjoy both a fat belly and a pregnant belly. Absolutely love them.

As for why I like fat, pretty much what everybody has already said. I like the round, soft, abundant look and I love the soft curvy feel as I run my hands over it. I love snuggling up to a nice fat girl who is fat enough to be soft everywhere I might touch - which is all of her! :-)

I like the freedom it signifies, to eat what you want, when you want, as often as you want, and as much as you want, and I love a subtle little jiggle or bounce in certain areas. I also love the heaviness, as in the feeling of her soft weight pressing into me if she's on top or reclining on my lap and I like the challenge of her size and weight if we're play fighting/wrestling.

I also like how a fatter body is more unique in appearance. Skinny bodies can all pretty much resemble each other with only a few variations, like height. As a person gains weight, they become a little more unique in appearance. I absolutely watching a person grow as they gain weight. I love watching their new fat fill out their body and tighten their clothes.

Kind of a disjointed, long winded response, but I'm on my phone, so not rewriting it :-)

Wish I wasn't on a mobile device lol. I'll try to keep it short. It's okay if this is a bigger deal to you than you thought it to be. That doesn't make you a bad person. This is more important to some, than to others, just like any other characteristic. It does mean you have to figure out how to deal with it.

If your girl was okay being bigger and now insisted on dieting and being smaller, why the change? Something they read? Something someone said? Something they randomly thought about and realized something that makes them feel the need to lose weight? Perhaps they suspect you're only "saying it to be nice" or maybe you do like them larger but perhaps they think you'd like them EVEN MORE smaller. Trying to pinpoint what changed and why, might be be helpful and might also be very hard lol.

One friend of mine was chubby and wasn't concerned about losing weight until her sister declared she would never lose weight. That sent her on a mission to prove she could, and she did, by taking extreme measures that had us worried. But, she did.

I think the best idea is to keep human nature in mind. What means the most to your girl, is your approval, support, acceptance and love. Never tie them to one particular thing. That's manipulation.

What I would do, is prove my sincerity in little subtle ways, that will add up over time and hope she reverts to her old ways. She might. She'll want to add to your happiness and she'll want you to enjoy her. Girls don't enjoy dieting and restricting themselves. That's no fun.

So, what would I do? I'd say things remind her how much fun we had before the diet. Subtly remind her what she's missing by dieting. Say positive things about her present while tying to something even better from the past.

"I was just remembering how fun/nice it was to eat out as much as we used to. All the good restaurants and no food to fix or dishes to wash. Pre-diet days, but I have to commend you on how well you've stuck with it. It's obviously important to you."

After something really good gets advertised on TV "Oh wow, did you see that? That's soooo good! Totally not compatible with your diet. Do you have any cheat days coming up?" Or, "Of you ever want to suspend your diet for an evening, let me know and we'll spend an evening discovering if it's as good as it looks"

"Wow, you look amazing in that dress/shirt/swimsuit. Even losing weigh/with as much weight as you've lost, you still look fantastic/hot/sexy". She may not ask, but she will definitely be wondering if you like her better before or now. If she does ask, be honest but don't make a big deal out of it. "Even though you look good now, before is still my favorite, but I'm glad you're accomplishing your goal. You've done well"

What you're doing is planting seeds. At some point in the future, they may start growing and even bare fruit. It's very unlikely - extremely unlikely - that anything you say or do, will change a girl's mind on the spot or over night, if she feels compelled to lose weight. Her mind can change, but it'll be a multi step process that takes time. You can help and encourage but you can't beat her over the head with it. If she suspects you have an agenda, you'll lose credibility. It kinda has to be something she arrives at on her own, but you can definitely help light the path.

Keep your focus on what she needs to feel good about herself, rather than feeling criticized or condemned for not doing what you want. If she was okay with being big in the past, she likely will again, especially if she's with someone who would appreciate and enjoy it too. At some point, she may feel that gives her permission to dump the diet and have fun.

Sorry this was so long and for any typos I missed. I hope it was at least partially helpful and I hope it works out for each of you - and everyone else in the same spot.

Yeah, that's kind of an awkward and risky spot. Rather than looking specifically for a "Fedee", I'd probably just look for a girl you genuinely enjoy who is comfortable being at least a little bigger - not constantly dieting and putting herself down.

Someone like that, is far more likely to be able to be opened minded and maybe even curious, if you introduce her to it, slowly, over time, so she can think about it and get comfortable it in incremental stages. If she never does, then at least you still got a great girl you can enjoy being in a relationship with, and that's far more valuable and fulfilling than focusing on finding one particular (and very rare) characteristic.

Good luck with your search. :-)

You're absolutely right. It goes back to beauty being in the eye of the beholder. We all have our preferences and it's important to remember that not everyone's preferences are the same and that's a very good thing. Otherwise, we'd all want the exact same person and we'd all have to look the same.

As I walk around stores and malls in different parts of the country, I am awed and amazed by the sheer variety and diversity of the human form. To me, that's beauty on a macro level.