Fantasy Feeder

Surviving summers heat for the disadvantaged (fat)

chubbynate:
I was getting ready to post a new discussion on being fat and dealing with the summer heat but you guys beat me to it. I've been sweating even more than before now that I've gotten bigger. By the time I reach 300 pounds I'll likely need to move north, lol.

Having a pool is the best way to deal with it. The deodorant between your fat rolls and folds is a good idea. I'm going to start doing that. My only concern is the toxic crap in the deodorant. Having it more places just means more toxic stuff on your skin.

My advice to my fellow fatties is to use a natural deodorant brand on those special areas of your body. Now I need to order some online and take my own advice. Until them I"ll be taking several cold showers a day when ever possible.

Also, baby powder or something like Gold Bond can take the place of the deodorant and help you immensely.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Lower sex drive from weight gain?

TheyCallMeHurricane:
It's probably different for every individual. I know for myself that when I weighed 240 my sex drive was less than it is now at 190, but not by much. While my wife's sex drive only seems to increase as she does.

I think the reason for this comes from several places, she feels more attractive the bigger she gets so she is less reserved while I feel more reserved. The higher levels of estrogen due to fat gain probably lower a male's sex drive while raising a woman's. And, (this may be a bit forward) but... just the comparison of how it feels could also play a role in that. When Fiona was 86 pounds she did not feel the same as she does now at 120 so just the difference in how sex feels could lower or raise someone's sex drive.

So:
Confidence,
Hormone changes,
And stimulation.

Also, having a partner or admirers who drool over you and encourage you may increase your confidence and subsequently make you feel more sexual and help you be more confident in the bedroom. No one, regardless of size should ever feel like they should hide their body from their partner.

Your last point is well taken. No one should believe that your greatest sex organ is between your legs. It's really between your ears, and what goes on in our amazing brains certainly has much to do with our libidos.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Is it bad?? {{sensitive topic}}

transkitten:
I have a Eating Disorder (Bulimia), but I'm really into stuffing/ force feeding..? It's like..i hate my body except for when I or someone else stuffs me..Is that maybe my brains way of trying to make me recover? Is it bad? Should I just..let myself give into my kink? Thoughts?

I doubt that this is your brain's way of making you recover. It's just that this fascination with fat and stuffing turns you on, and that may or may not be related to bulimia.

Is it bad? No, don't think for a moment that it is. There is far too much shaming in our society -- and far too little pleasure.

If this makes you feel good, give in to it. And really, this may help you develop a better self-concept and learn to love your body.

One final thought: Since you are here on this site, I rather suspect you would have a hard time fighting your desires anyway. You might as well find some joy in them.

I hope you can find someone to stuff you -- someone who will also show appreciation for your body.

Best to you.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Why?

flingbing1819:
For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated by fat, but I don't know why. This is something I need to know (I need to know why to everything); while this is by no means any sort of scientific study, this is just me looking for answers. I can't figure it out and am hoping that perhaps if I can talk to people about why/how others enjoy it, I can find insight into my own personal reasons. What do others enjoy about weight? I like the aesthetic, not the mentality, so what about the aesthetic is enjoyable? Psychological reasons make sense, but solely physical attraction doesn't.

So much of who we are is dictated by our body chemistry, genetics and biological imperatives. So what about these things might make fat and weight gain seem so fascinating to you? And are there environmental (nuture) factors as well?

These are difficult questions, certainly. And if we think of ourselves as animals, what is it about animals that leads to certain mates being preferable over others?

Sorry, I'm just rambling and asking more questions rather than giving some plausible answers.

I do think there is some biological imperative among many humans to prefer a bigger mate. It could be perceived health, virility, fertility, even the notion that a fat man (or woman) has a regular food source -- as well as the capacity to store food as adipose to get through times of food shortage, famine, the winter, whatever.

When you see a big man, your body's reaction might be fascination and attraction due simply to propagation of the species -- the survival of the fittest (or in this case, the fattest).

And also, there is nurture. At some key point in your early through adolescent life, did you experience something related to fatness or fat people that caused arousal or strange feelings? You may not even remember that event, but somewhere your brain took notice and associated all things good with all things fat.

Perhaps someday, they will discover the "fat-lover's gene" and we will see that all this was pre-determined way before our birth -- same as our gender and sexual preferences.

Until then, it's a fascinating subject, and like you, I think about it often.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Why?

FAscination:
I am sure that there must have been tons of research looking into why people have certain sexual preferences. I don't think we will ever understand this or know why. I have had this fascination for fat for as long as I can remember, so I am sure it must be something unconscious from very early childhood or something I was born with.
For me, it is mostly about the �softness�. Someone could have the biggest belly on earth, but if it would be hard to touch, it would not do much for me. Touching, feeling and cuddling a soft body, or the anticipation of how soft someone must be when I see soft curves, is what gets me going. Is this because it reminds me of soft cuddles as a baby, or the contrary, a lack of them? I don�t know. Is it something genetic? Possible, but then it must be random genetic variations, because fatsexuality doesn't usually seem to run in families.
I have thought about this a lot, seeking answers for my preference because I was struggling with it when I was younger. But you just have to accept it as it is without asking why because it will not go away. It is like if we were on a train that never stops. You are on it and you can't get off. You can see the outside world through your window, but you are not part of it. You may dream about it, pretend to be part of it, but you're not. You're fatsexual and you have no idea at all what other people find so attractive about skinny people. You can be sad about being on this train and constantly be staring out of the window, or you can sit back, get to know the other passengers on the train and enjoy the ride wherever it takes you.

Of course, this is just a metaphor, don't take it literally. I don't mean we are people in a different universe, of course we interact with "normal" people as well. But sexually, I feel on a different planet. I have no idea what drives other men so crazy about skinny or normal sized women. I have fallen in love with skinny women, but it was purely platonic, no sexual feelings involved at all. Sexually, I will never feel complete unless I am with a big woman, and I have learnt to accept that as it is without continuing to wonder why.

Part of the reason we have this conversation is the perceived societal "norms" which tell us this is something abnormal and perhaps deviant or perverted.

However, it doesn't work that way at all. We wouldn't have a conversation on these preferences if they had to do with liking men with muscular chests (rather than flabby ones) or women with narrow waistline (rather than roly-poly wide ones).

But throughout history, what passes for desirable (sexual or not) has changed, and different cultures treasure different features and appearances.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Feederism identity and attraction

flingbing1819:
I have been thinking recently about my personal dichotomous feelings about what is attractive: I think that big, round bellies on other people is the sexiest thing possible, however only find myself attractive when I am losing weight. For a very long time I believed that I was /attracted/ to both body types (very fat people and unhealthily skinny people), but after developing an eating disorder, realized that I am *attracted* to fat people, but want to *be* a 'skinny person'; I don't actually find unnaturally thin people sexually arousing, but I do find them... beautiful.
I understand the concept of mutual gainers, but I now and curious about if people who fall on either the 'feedee' or 'feeder' side have the same opposing beliefs on what is attractive on others and on them, and why. To people on either side, is all fat attractive? Is it only attractive on yourself or others?

What the heart wants, we can do little about.

I think that we all have a wider range of attraction than what we give ourselves credit for. I know, for myself, that my longest and most fulfilling relationships have often been based on much more than physical features.

The ability to laugh with someone is sexy as hell.
The ability to talk for hours about all kinds of things is sexy as hell.
The ability to just be silent with someone -- and really feel together -- is sexy as hell.

Oh well, I feel I'm going off topic, but bottom line: I think everyone should give themselves permission to expand their preferences.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Submissive gainer

TheWhipHand:
I started fattening up my bf a little while ago. Things are proceeding well, but the little Butterball has become rather submissive as he has gained. Has anyone else experienced a gainer or gaining accompanied by submissive feelings?

This just seems the natural consequence of most feeder/feedee relationships. Not that there aren't dom feedees and sub feeders, and those folks certainly enjoy that dynamic.

But by nature, the one feeding is the one in control of everything.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Lower sex drive from weight gain?

boundandfeed:
I think there are Domme feeders, that would love this expect of control. Know any?

TheWhipHand:
The only time when my little Butterball seemed reluctant, I was able to tilt him over and make him change his mind.

Butterball had grown more loving and sweet, but also more passive in bed, but I enjoy that

I think you hit upon the dynamic that many enjoy as they gain weight -- the giving over of control to someone else.

As someone who has experienced this, it is absolutely wonderful -- and perhaps a great relief -- to just let the feeder decide everything for you.

And I don't agree with the premise that weight gain leads to less sex drive. There are several studies which show quite the opposite, in fact.

Plus, the nature of just becoming a hedonistic glutton also opens one up to more overindulgence in all things.

Gluttony and lust are the powerful twins in the "deadly sins". One feeds the other (pun intended). Together, they just increase one's appetite for all decadent pleasures.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

Would anyone like a "how to stuff yourself...or your partner" guide?

hungrypiggygirl:
Sorry to bump this topic but did anything come out of this project? I would love to read the guide

Yes, Molly, is this something you've done yet?

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles

If you had to pick one little debbie cake...

Swiss rolls!

You are what you eat, and if you eat enough of them, you'll grow your own rolls!
****
An old question for some new fantasy feeder folks.

7 years

GrowingLoveHandles